Single for a month finding new guy very interesting

divine1966 · Oct 07, 2015, 05:16 AM

I don't even think the issue is not buying a house. Not everyone has to or can. But renting a room or an apartment doesn't take 10 years or even a year? Where does it take that long ? And why? As long as you have a job you can rent a place.

Also from your other posts he is way in his 30s! He doesn't have his own place even if rented? Even if just a room in
The house?

He talks about scriptures? Religious folks don't have sex in porn shops!!!! He lied about religious aspect. Stay away from both ex and current man. They don't owe you the house but they owe you respect but they don't show that

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Rose76 · Oct 07, 2015, 05:39 AM

[QUOTE=divine1966;4712803. He talks about scriptures? Religious folks don't have sex in porn shops!!!! He lied about religious aspect.
[/QUOTE]

Good point. I glossed right over that.

Oct 07, 2015, 07:19 AM

It's perfectly OK to friendzone him because you don't want kids.

I've done the same thing myself with a couple of women who were compatible with me all because they had kids and I dislike children myself.

Take care of you first and foremost. Never settle for second best.

ladytiger · Oct 07, 2015, 09:38 AM

Someone else mentioned finding a guy one day and getting married. I have nothing against marriage it would be nice, but I would need to redefine marriage for myself and I don't mind common law either (even though the state I live in doesn't recognize it).

Darknessismyfriend,

Yep, I have friend zoned a lot of single dads in the past ohh they were pissed! Not like any of them had any romantic interest in me, not sure why they were mad anyway.

Sigh. I haven't heard from new friend in a few days told him good morning hope everything is alright and left it at that.

ladytiger · Oct 07, 2015, 09:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rose76

Smart people don't buy houses with people they're not married to. The most important reason has nothing to do with scripture or religion. Any lawyer will tell you this. It has to do with the fact that people's property rights are insecure when they co-own a home with someone they are not married to. So people get married first and THEN they think about investing in a home together. And, usually, it takes two incomes for a couple to make that investment. It's not usually a gift that a man gives a woman. It's an investment that a couple struggles to make together, with both contributing as best they can. And they co-own it, with both their names on the deed. They share the responsibility. That's how sensible people make progress in life.

Of course, before people get married, they do have to have a place to live - as man and wife. So they get an apartment, or one of them already has an apartment. Or, in some families, they live with his or her parents, while they save up a down payment. Very often, these days, a couple will live together in his or her apartment, until they proceed to get married. It's good to know someone real, real well before you marry them.

If you want to know if a man is committed to you, you don't find that out by asking, "Hey, Honey, are you committed to me.?" You will know by how he behaves and what he puts in to the relationship. A guy who's idea of having a love life with you is to take you to rented rooms in porno parlors is not committed to you . . . and doesnt even respect you - or himself - very much. You don't go by what guys tell you, but by what they show you. If, after 10 years, a guy is still living with his parents, then being with you is not a high priority for him. You're just a convenient outlet for him.

So look forward to having a little place of your own. You'll learn a lot from the experience. You'll bump into guys who'll offer to move in with you and share expenses. Don't even consider doing that, until you have lived for at least a year on your own.

I totally agree. Living in two different places would be a nightmare marriage which he didn't see it that way told me it would work out until we have full time jobs. He also said an ex co worker and his wife don't live together but still legally married his wife has an apt and I said how come the guy isn't with his family? He said not sure. Why are you trying to pattern what other married couples are doing? I don't want to live like that not in a marriage like that.

My ex said something to me that was disturbing during the summer. I was excited about my financial goals and I am almost at my goal. Something I said about savings and spending he adds into my sentence "spend your money on me." I looked at him and couldn't believe what I just heard this was before he was hired. That was the problem i was always spending my money on him and gee he wonders why I don't trust him with my money anymore. I told him he should be ashamed of himself not like he can't start his own financial goals. If his mom knew he'd been doing that to me or even heard that comment, she would slap him so hard and tell him why can't you be a man and have your own assets? I can see that conversation and big time argument between them. Her son is just like his dad as his dad is married a 2nd time got his wife taking care of him like he's a king (I've seen how his wife is treated like a slave) and my coworker said your ex has two women taking care of him you and his mom.

I am almost there to moving!

Rose76 · Oct 07, 2015, 03:16 PM

That's one smart co-worrker yu've got.

I can see why you wouldn't want a conventional marriage. Sounds like you've got a much better system figured out.

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Single for a month finding new guy very interesting

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