[C2015]

I am hurt with my boyfriend. Last month he asked if we bad to see each other every week. On Friday he called me at the last minute on his way here letting me know he's on his way. That's the only notice I had. I knew he was coming Friday but he never said what time. It made me mad him calling saying he's on his way. I had to run around at the last minute to get ready. Twice he's done that last minute bull crap. I finally told him yesterday how I felt. Friday he was here only two hours. As he left he said he thought about taking me out to lunch. Then he said he wanted to wait until he got paid to come here. That really made me mad. He has only taken me out once for lunch. We've been together over a month. He never spends money on me. I do not give him sex. This week he's spending his days off with a friend. I have seen him only two hours this month. He never calls me he sends me usually just one text a day. I am tired of this. He never wants to go out on dates he doesn't call me and he doesn't seem to want to see me. So why on earth does he want a girlfriend?

[C2015]

I feel like I'm an option not a priority to him.

[JustJenny]

To me it doesn't sound like he loves you. Do you love him?

[Mika no Chiyoko]

From what you're saying it sounds as if your boyfriend may be stringing you along, and it certainly sounds like he doesn't respect you. I do agree with what JustJenny said.

[C2015]

I do love him. I have often wondered if he loves me. All though he says he loves me every day I can't help but wonder. I told my step mom how I felt. She said maybe he's saving up for something special like a ring. I know she has his number and he has her's. I do know for Christmas he asked her what I would like best. He showed her three things. He knows she knows more than anyone everything I like and everything I want. I asked her last night if he has said anything to her as in about a ring. She hasn't responded about my question. Usually if she knows something I am getting and I don't know it is she will tell me if I ask her to.

[C2015]

She did just say he hasn't said anything.

[JustJenny]

Getting a ring after one month of dating? That is a little bit unrealistic...

And why is he spending the weekend with a friend and not you? I really don't understand why he doesn't make more effort to see you more often. Or are you both busy?

[C2015]

My mom and step dad became engaged after just two weeks of dating. So a ring after one month isn't unrealistic. My Dad and step mom were also in a hurry. My parents second marriages have both worked despite the fast engagements. They have both been remarried for nearly 30 years.

My schedule isn't at all busy. JustJenny I am glad to know I'm not the only one who doesn't understand him not making an effort to see me more.

[Bill3]

C2015 I am glad that your mother's marriage has worked out. Even so, when you look at the statistics, the experiences of many couples, I think you will find that the odds of having a lasting, happy marriage are much better when the couple has a longer time of dating and getting to know each other.

And why is he spending the weekend with a friend and not you?

You could ask him this.

So why on earth does he want a girlfriend?

You could ask him this as well.

For best results, though, don't ask him these questions when you are mad. If you are mad, he will withdraw and defend.

Instead, ask in a civil, kind way. Express genuine curiosity and interest in his thinking.

[divine1966]

I am really confused. Is this the same guy you said you thought was going to ask you to marry him? And you were planning on who invite to the wedding. Yet he only saw you two hours this month and never took you out and only sends one text a day and never calls plus spends weekends with friends .

Nothing in his behavior indicates the desire for serious relationship with you let alone marrying? That's not how guys who are that serious act.

What did you base idea of him marrying you on? It can't be his behavior towards you!

Also how old are you two? I thought you were very young. But if your parents were remarried nearly 30 years you have to be in your 30s at least? 30? He acts like much younger guy

Does your BF not work? Why can't he go to simple lunch?

Why your stepmom has his number already? He doesn't call you yet talks to your stepmom on the phone?

He might like to have a gf but he either wants to take it very slow ( which is fine) or wants very casual and undemanding. I would have a conversation with him what does he really want but I would abandon ideas that he is about to propose. It's way too eRly considering how he behaves.

Even if he does propose I don't suggest you accept as he doesn't even want to hang out with you! Plus he is too broke to eat simple lunch?

He might not be the best prospect for dating let alone marrying. You deserve so much better



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