I am creeped out by nice males in general

I think I will always be uncomfortable and creeped out for random guys or any guy in general asking questions and trying to get to know me. Why would you want to know if I am married what I work as what my age is? Just so creepy and makes me so uncomfortable I guess that makes it easy for me to be interested in guys that are apathetic and uncaring towards me hmm... It's just doesn't make me feel as uncomfortable and as threatened as a guy being interested in me...

How old are you, if I may ask?

How do you expect people to know if it's okay to know you?

Preliminary info is important. Seems like the guys who are asking those kinds of questions are less creepy than the ones who don't...

Are you in therapy? I highly recommend it to you just reading about what bothers you ( like normal human interactions?)

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I think it's just random small talk and nothing to be creeped out about. Why does that make you so uncomfortable?

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I have no idea it's like it's an invasion of my privacy when a guy starts asking questions and how am I going to bring this off to my psychologist these are strange things to be creeped out by. It's almost like I am visualizing them hurting me while they're asking me questions. sigh*

20 years old

So uncaring apathetic guys who are certain to hurt you, are less scary than nice guys whom you visualize hurting you?


Yip, I would definitely be discussing this with my therapist, his job is to help me through the weird.


I would rather admit to illogical fears and work through them, in the hopes of being comfortable and able to date a nice guy, than doomed to be stuck with a**holes forever.

It's no use I believe that all guys are selfish, heartless people that can't love you unless they are getting things out of you. I don't really believe their is such thing as nice guys just guys that hide their true intentions.

So then what the problem?

I am unable to attach myself to others without feeling terrified and completely loosing my identity...

Definitely a subject to bring up to your psychologist. Talk to them, tell them how you feel. It's important for them to know these things.

But why would you even want to attempt to attach to others if you truly believe....




Forgive my confusion but you are contradicting yourself quite a bit in this thread, so that makes it hard for me to formulate a helpful response.


For what it's worth, I too had a problem with losing myself (still do and am working on it) boundaries are key, and a therapist can help with that.

Yeah I guess I fear that I will never have strong boundaries with men and boys and there just going to make me a towl to wipe there wet shower floor. I guess, this is based on past experiences with them if you can understand what I mean now.

It's the nature of things. Everything is based on mutual interest. Girls like guys because they need care and attention. Can we say there is no nice girls? So, it's a two way road. You just need to make sure it's a just two way road, and don't let anyone to take advantage of you. I suggest to talk with your (girl) friends about these things, as friends could help you spot who is good and who is not among the guys.

I can't imagine a guy wanting to get to know you any better so you should be fine really.

Your title is "I am creeped out by NICE men..." So does that mean you rather be approached by rude ones? Is there something about your past that makes you dislike men in general? I have this issue with older women where I'm very intimidated and feel picked on because growing up, I never had a good female role model as my mom passed when I was young. I actually relate and get along with men a lot more. I'm starting therapy again soon and I plan on working on my issues with women. You should do the same

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Lol oh my

Well, it's to do with being mistreated by guys because it kind of feels good versus being treated nicely by guys

That's what I was thinking to myself last night why was I worrying about it?

I couldn't agree more with you.

Cleared my confusion honestly.

Not to be rude, but I am hoping this is just an age thing and something that will pass as you get older. I have been hurt by a lot of girls in the past, and yes sometimes because of that I have a hard time trusting them. I still give them a chance though. My point is that this is a two-way street. Especially in the society we live in today, females can be just as cruel as males. Not all men are bad and out just for themselves. Just like not all females are bad and out for themselves. And to be honest, you throwing us all in the same category is a tad hurtful. Yes, I consider myself a "nice guy".

This is definitely something I would speak to my T about, but I also think it's something you have to work out on your own. Just because someone is being nice to you doesn't mean they are looking for something in return. It also doesn't necessarily mean they are trying to have a relationship with you either. Sometimes it could just be friendly conversation, which in my opinion is definitely lacking these days. Nice guys can hurt you, and they can definitely turn out not to be nice. But I would take a chance with someone being nice way before I would with someone being rude from the get-go lol.

Yes, I am just the one who is feeling bitter and like a crappy person and I am basically trying to blame jerks for my problems but to be honest I don't want to be bitter and angry and negative all the time anymore. I had enough of how disgusting I am conducting myself.

That is really confusing. It's hard to tell who you are blaming.

Maybe there is hope for you. As someone who has been the nice guy and the... not so nice guy I can clear up a few things maybe. What we're looking for mostly is someone who isn't the center of her own world. Someone who is interesting. The rest is fluff more or less... the icing isn't the best part of the cake. You may be wondering (or not...) if this is the nice guy talking or the not so nice guy. I think people need a little mystery in life.