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#1
Jul 04, 2016, 08:54 PM
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I feel very guilty right now. I'm talking to two guys right now via text.
Guy #1 is very much into me and has expressed stong attraction with equally strong reluctance due to understanding I am very vulnerable emotionally due to my mental health issues. We have been talking for a few months now and I enjoy every word. He says he cares deeply for me and the last thing he wants to do is hurt me with his tendencies to be emotionally and sexually dominate. He also has been recovering from a really bad breakup with a girl he was engaged to. He keeps on saying we are just good friends but it might change down the road. He also says he is happy I haven't been talking to other guys. I haven't been the most honest with him in this area as I have another guy I am texting with. Anyway, enter Guy #2. I went on Okcupid and met another guy when Guy #1 said he wasn't going to peruse me romantically despite wanting to so bad. I haven't been talking to him long, only this past weekend, but I feel super guilty about not telling Guy #1 about Guy #2. I kinda like Guy #2 because we share an affinity for aquariums and fish keeping. I just feel so guilty and like I am texting him behind Guy #1's back. Its almost like I am cheating on Guy #1 with Guy #2. I just don't know what to do....
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 MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!! [UPDATED: 4/30/2017] LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!! |
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#2
Jul 04, 2016, 10:18 PM
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If you aren't in exclusive relationship with neither one of these men, you can talk to 20 other guys. No need to feel guilty. Have you met any of them? If not then for sure there is nothing to feel guilty about.
The guy who tends to be sexually and otherwise dominant (or so he says, rolling my eyes)sounds rather strange to me. If he really just wants to be friends as he says, he has no business to even comment on if you talk to other guys or not. He sounds fishy to me. Bottom line there is nothing to feel guilty about. He isn't your boyfriend and you don't need to disclose who else you are talking to Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
 Onward2wards, unaluna
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#4
Jul 05, 2016, 05:40 AM
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Guy #1 isn't as fishy sounding as you'd think. He's more upfront and honest than anything. He's just being cautious I think.
He and I are making plans to meet up. Since he lives 4 hours away, he is asking a friend of his who lives in my area if he can stay with them a couple of days. However, since the friend is over seas visiting family, we won't be meeting up for another few weeks.
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MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!! [UPDATED: 4/30/2017] LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!! |
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#5
Jul 05, 2016, 06:02 AM
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Ok. Personally I think
if the guy says he doesn't want to hurt me as he tends to be dominant (in what sense he is afraid to hurt me?) and he is reluctant ( whatever is he reluctant of) I see it as not dating material but I might be totally wrong. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
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#6
Jul 05, 2016, 06:04 AM
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Can't he stay in the hotel?
Overall if the guy says he won't pursue you romantically, then he isn't dating material, but I might be wrong Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
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#7
Jul 05, 2016, 06:26 AM
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Well, hotels cost money and he's still getting back on his feet from his breakup.
__________________
MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!! [UPDATED: 4/30/2017] LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!! |
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#8
Jul 05, 2016, 07:28 AM
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Ok. One or two nights in a simple hotel/motel can't be that expensive unless one doesn't work. I assume he is a grown man and is employed. Just my opinion, I again might be wrong. Just be careful.
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#9
Jul 05, 2016, 08:19 AM
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I think it's perfectly fine to wait for friends to return so that he has a cheaper place to stay. Plus he can spend some time with his friends as well. I've got a solid job with a good wage, and if I can avoid hotel costs I do. Then again, travel costs where I live are super expensive as I am very isolated.
Artchic, it's totally fine to be talking to more than one guy. You are not in any relationship so there is no need to be commited to anyone. He's not your boyfriend, so his desire for you to be exclusive... Well, that's just his ego talking basically. I understand how you're a bit conflicted though. There's always going to be someone you are drawn to more, but you can't pick one over the other when you've not met. Cause it might not work out in person. But at the same time it could feel like a betrayal of the guy you like most, and like you're stringing along the second one. But that's part of dating.
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"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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