why is it so hard

why is it so hard to meet someone / have a relationship when you have mental illness...

im intelligent, attractive, fun/funny, yet cant meet anyone because im sick apparently

i just wish someone could give me a chance to prove my worth, someone that im interested in.. tired of being alone..

I'm sorry to hear how alone you feel and have been.



What happens when you meet someone that might interest you?

they dont see me for who i am, but for issues i face

sure im avoidant... i have severe ptsd... i can't drive so dont have a car (due to ptsd)
i cant work because of issues

so they think im a loser, maybe i am a loser... but im the nicest guy, most dedicated, hardest working, type of person i know... but none of the qualities matters when your 'social standing' is so low...

doesnt seem to matter that im working so hard to make my life better.. or matter how hard everything is for me

im really about to just give up all hope that its possible for someone like me to ever have a real meaningful relationship, even more so to be able to fall in love with someone that can love me back

and my pathetic birthday is right around the corner, december 6th... to celebrate alone again, im going to get so wasted ill have to recover for a week..

Finding someone is hard for many unfortunately (((hugs))). If you want to meet someone, please don't give up on the possibility. 14 years ago I could have written your post almost word for word but I met someone when I least expected it. Give yourself time and keep working hard to improve your life...someone will come along and appreciate your effects. There are lots of single people out there in the same position you are in. (((Hugs)))

A hug for you:

I have met a couple of men here on pc...and loved them both very much. One I still talk to , we've known each other for over 2 years, still haven't gotten together though, life keeps getting in the way (he lives very far away), he has a couple of diagnoses...the other, we did very well for a year and he had numerous diagnoses, unfortunately, it wasn't the illness that made me break things off, it was him taking advantage of me financially. he was legitimately living in poverty and I didn't mind helping but when he asked for money 3 times in one month, I had to tell him I just couldn't send the third time, I didn't have it to give. he was upset with me for not sending more but I had to stand my ground and eventually end things. In saying all this, I found that my bf's with mh issues were more loving and understanding for the most part than any of the 'neurotypical' men I have met.
I hope you find someone as well that you connect with and find love with. Being ill doesn't mean we aren't able to find someone to love and who loves us.

Not for as long as we keep trying to overcome the issues that can make some people think we might be losers...and where maybe you absolutely cannot do something for yourself, do something else for someone else. Having character is great, but character in action is what grabs people's attention.

Hi ElevatedSoul I love your username. There are social dating groups for people with mental illness. How do you feel being in a relationship with someone whose MI? Not here to tell you what to do but one benefit is you could be yourself, be open. There is a dating site called nolongerlonely.com. Relationships: Online Dating Resources | Psych Central
Good luck to you in finding a partner.