Why so much communication with this ''female'' friend? Confused

About almost 2 years ago (Beginnig of our relationship), my boyfriend who is in his late thirtys, asked me (27 years old) to do him a favor and to please call his female ”friend” to give her an address (which I looked up later on and found out it happened to be of a lawyer as far as I can remember!).


He wanted me to do it because the woman’s husband is somehow Abusive and jealous so basically it seemed to me that this woman in in some sort of toxic relationship and she has 2 children with this abusive husband , and supposedly this husband has even been in jail in the past.My bf wanted me to do him the favour of calling her, Just in case the husband picked up the phone out of rage. That way her husband would think I was just her friend, and would not put her in any danger or suspect that it was my boyfriend calling her.The abusive husband had even called my boyfriend numerous time at midnight to tell him to not communicate with his wife. and he also smashed his wife’s computer for talking too much on Facebook.My bf also told me this woman is also complicated since she does things to nag at her husband.Also this woman lives in New York while my bf and I are studying in Latin America(Fact: the women is originally from this country where we are both at right now) but my Bf and I live in the states but are currently finishing our carees here in latin america and he is heading back at any time now.


So Recently 5 days ago, after 2 years of not mentioning her to me whatsoever, he mentions me this women AGAIN!! The fact that now she is contacting him because he says he has ‘suicidal’ thoughts., so he was emailing her back trying to talk her out of it.He told me that she is a ''long time” friend and he is “concerned of her doing something crazy or wanting to hurt herself'' and that she contacts him when she needs his help or advice.I feel my boyfriend is too caught up in all this drama. From a very long time (Since we started dating I been hearing about this), I have a very strong feeling this is an ex girlfriend and there is some type of an emotional connection or affair between them or this woman is using him as an emotional dishrag,,,,even though he says she’s a ''friend'.What do you think can really be going on here? I already asked him twice and he keeps on saying the same things nothing new so, I am very confused here.

I don't really know, honestly I don't think it's the right thing to make assumptions, though. You may just be jumping on conclusion. I'd say try to have a VERY serious talk with him about this and explain your worries and fears. If he keeps denying, then I guess you can just keep checking on him. I'm sorry I can't be more helpful :/

I don't know for sure, but if he hasn't been mentioning her for two years if he had something to hide why mention her at,all. If there had been constant drama with this woman the whole time you were together, and your bf was constantly inserting himself into the situations, then I could maybe see why you would be worried.
Tbh though he avoided getting involved before by asking you to pass the details onto her.
If something was going on between them do you think it likely he would encourage you to talk to her at all, for any reason?
If this was a guy friend would this even be a question?

Guys have a tendency to offer good solid practical advice which might be what she needs, we just don't know.
If one of my friends was separating from her his partner, then I hope I'd be able to offer some help.

Maybe as Mickey says it would be best to just talk to him about your suspicions.
But it's only worth asking him if you are going to believe the answer otherwisewhats the point.

Hope it all works out. Take care.

Um... Don't want to be negative but sound like a bunch of crap. The "She's mentally unstable and I'm the only person there for her" is used to cover up what is usually called "cheating". Keep your boundaries sister.

This is too serious of a situation for me to comment or guess about. I can understand wanting more answers about the nature of this relationship and feel that having an open talk with your boyfriend is in order. Good luck to all parties involved....I hope you all stay safe and end up content.,