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#1
Oct 28, 2017, 12:34 AM
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Hello. Recently my significant other and I got into an argument and I'm not sure what to make of it. I saw that she was Facebook friends with a guy she had a one night stand with 4 months before her and I met (who is a friend of a friend of hers). They have no prior relationship, spent only a couple days together, and haven't really spoken since (only a couple scattered texts after the hookup). I kindly asked her to unfriend him since it bothered me and she became quite upset. She said "that would be rude" and "that's just not how we [not sure who she's referencing] do things." I was surprised since I thought this was a reasonable request, but now she's upset with me and harboring some resentment over the ordeal. This was after she expressed some hesitancy at the idea of become Facebook friends with me. Not sure what to think of that. Thoughts?
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#2
Oct 28, 2017, 05:01 AM
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If it was a one night stand it just seems weird to me personally, that she'd bother to keep him on fb if she knows how you feel about it. That or she's overly sensitive about hurting other people's feelings, given that she said it would be rude.
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#3
Oct 28, 2017, 05:08 AM
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Suck it up. Donīt be controlling. If she wants to keep some ugly *** dude on Facebook, let her. Sure, some things are worth communicating and getting upset over. But certain things in a relationship you just have to let slide, making everything into big deal will only exhaust you.
If she still messaged this dude though, that would be bad. And then you could definitely bring it up again, and stand your ground. |
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#4
Oct 28, 2017, 02:02 PM
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Why is it important to you that she unfriend him?
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#5
Oct 28, 2017, 05:13 PM
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I hooked up with this guy many many years ago and he and I became Facebook friends. He does a lot of work in a field that I'm very passionate about as an advocate. I doubt that we'll ever even hang out again, since we live in different towns, but it's been nice to see all he's done since our short time together.
If my BF demanded I unfriend him, I would unfriend my BF. You don't tell me who can be my friend and who can't. You're opening up a huge can of worms here. Unless you're worried about your girlfriend's fidelity, LET IT GO. If you are worried about your girlfriend being faithful, that's a whole different conversation that you need to have with her. Seesaw
__________________
 What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
 Bill3
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#6
Oct 28, 2017, 05:52 PM
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There's a lot of different perspectives, but this thread reviews a lot.
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationshi...e_has_had_sex/ The best idea is to voice your discomfort about it, but stop short of making demands. |
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#7
Oct 28, 2017, 06:02 PM
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Quote:
__________________
What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
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#8
Oct 28, 2017, 06:16 PM
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Woops, null that post then.
In any regard, it's ok to voice your insecurities (because we all have them). Demanding your significant other to do things is a different ballgame though. Mistakes are made in relationships. It's ok though. Last edited by sky457; Oct 28, 2017 at 06:32 PM. |
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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