[a.l.90]

My girlfriend of 5 years and I broke up. It wasn't a nasty argument, we didn't fight, but it still hurts so much. It was more of a mutual agreement that there was so much going on in our lives and we have so many inner demons that we need to work on in order for us to be happy with ourselves. Because if we aren't happy with ourself, how can we make each other happy? It's scary because I am so used to doing everything with her and depending on her for so much. Now I have to find ways to occupy myself because I overthink and worry about everything way too much. I'm scared of what the future holds. I don't know whether or not we will be back together after we have fixed things or if we're gonna just move on from each other. And it terrifies me to think of her with someone else.... I have so much going on and I just need advice.. How do I battle this? How do I not sit and cry every night?

[seesaw]

I think you two made a very mature decision. It will be hard for a while, you will cry a lot...but eventually the pain will ease. Time does heal all wounds.

Try to distract yourself with things you like to do; if you keep yourself from ruminating on it, you will feel better.

Seesaw

[MickeyCheeky]

It will take time. Keep yourself busy and work on your self-esteem. It will be hard at first, but keep going.

Many hugs to you

[a.l.90]

It just seems so hard... and I feel like what’s holding me together is he hope that we’d get back together after some time... but i don’t even know if that’s something that would happen... I can’t focus on that and hold on to thag and in the end be let down.

You never know what can happen -- anything is possible. And it was a very mature decision. It's painful and very hard I know... I just went through the mourning of a breakup. It's going to take time, as others are saying, but it will get better as time goes by. Mickey has great advice -- keep yourself occupied and busy somehow. Also, do you have friends you can lean on for company and support? I called my friends a lot for support through my breakup and went out a lot with my friends. Most helpful to me was also posting here a lot about it.

Also keep reminding yourself that this truly is for the best right now. It was a wise decision. That should help soften the blow somewhat.

Do you have a therapist? That can help too.

Hang in there.... understand that you will go through a mourning process, and it's perfectly normal to mourn the loss.

(((((Hugs)))))))

[a.l.90]

You’re right... I never know what can happen. I’m trying to keep myself occupied and keep my mind away but it seems like every little thing reminds me of her. I only have one good friend that I feel I can go to with anything but they’re too busy with their significant other too so that’s hard.

I do feel like coming on here for advice or even to vent has been helping me a lot lately with everything that I’m feeling.

Thank you all for your positive words of advice & encouragement! I truly appreciate it so much