Becoming a shut in

Just watching a lot of TV and sleeping. I fear that I don’t have the intestinal fortitude to get out of this. It’s been a long lonely slog and I don’t have anymore magic dust. The dawn is harsh dear Plato. The fact that I’m getting old don’t help. Grant me peace in this final act..... blue will always be my favorite color - ah but what of love.....turn out the light please!!!!!!

Gets some good shoes and start walking--start with 15 minutes then keep adding 5 minutes until you are walking at least 40 minutes a day. I am 54 and I walk 4.5 miles a day. It helps with my depression and after a while, you will start enjoying it. When I started walking after being in the hospital--I forced myself even though the "bouncing" was painful and it hurt my knees. (They had weakened from being immobile in the hospital or IP for 25 days.) Once I walked for a year, the walking strengthened my muscles around my knees (I have osteoarthritis) to the point that they hurt less and movement helps my joints feel better.

Just noticed this "Location: Seattle"--I think this may explain some of how you feel right now--the chill and the rain does make people depressed during the winter. I assume you have a raincoat? I must admit that sunny days with mild temperatures make walking much more enjoyable. Spring is coming--that will help you so much!!!!

It snowed today. We got about four inches... air temperature 15 degrees... feels like 9 degrees with the wind. No place to go... nothing to do... I've spent most of the day here on PC. The good thing is, I guess, I AM old! So I have no expectations of anything else.

Well I’m oldish - what’s throwing me into a tailspin is some upcoming surgery - it’s always been hard for me to get motivated but the surgery is really putting my feet in the cement....I fear big time being able to take care of myself. Therefore, there’s fear and loneliness and general anger at life. Thanks!

That's right... now that you mention it, I recall your impending surgery. I'm sorry that is still hanging over you. I have something going on, on the right side of my abdomen. I had a double hernia repair there going on 20 years ago now & I think I've done some additional damage to it. I was doing some yoga & physical therapy exercises for my low back. But I've had to stop because it made my side ache. I'll only go to the doctor if I'm forced into it.

I’m to the point where I’m alright if I can just enjoy my chair, my TV and go for my walk..... I don’t ask much but that’s in jeopardy now at least the walk part ☹️☹️☹️

Yep, I would say walking is so beneficial in a lot of ways. And it's cheap and easy. I walk about the same plus do a ton of exercise. Think of all the ways you could add walking and exercise in your life. Walking groups, meetup.com, exercise classes, walking tours etc etc. Do you like dogs. Do you know anyone with a dog, if so offer to take it for walks.

I'm sorry you feel this way. I agree with the others.. if you could go for a walk every one in a while you might feel better.

I walk everyday - I guess I’m just tired of paying people (therapist) to listen to me. It’s degrading and not very satisfying. I’m having my arm operated on next week and I hired somebody just to show up for a few days afterwards. It just beats you down that nobody is close enough for you to rely on. This my friend has always been the case. Thing is I’m pretty comfortable with myself - until something happens where having somebody around would make life bearable. I hate being such a downer and I realize that I sound like I’m paralyzed but I’m tired and scraping what’s left at the bottom of the jar.....

PC is free. When I haven't been able to afford therapy--I posted here instead. Therapy is not a cure all or helpful for every situation. I am sorry you don't have a friend or relative to rely on. I know this happens more as we get older (we lose our siblings, ect. )

What about volunteering with at risk kids? Latchkey kids, Big brother ? Could be really rewarding , just a thought?

Right now I just want to get through the surgery and feel good about it... it’s a big cloud hanging over my existence - thanks everyone!!!!!!

The trouble with chronic depression is that it's chronic. You do get depleted from having to pull out of it over and over. I know that firsthand. But you pulled out of it, in the past, when that was hard to do. You probably can, and will, pull out of it again.

Start small. Maybe just shower and go to the store. Get yourself some special treats. Pick up something nice to have for breakfast in the morning. Then let that be part of what helps you get up tomorrow. What you've done before, you can do again. Some days, we have to be satisfied with doing just one constructive thing - just one thing.

Hope you feel better. The rest you've taken was one you needed.