[Zkk122]

Hi guys. I am writing for my Husband as he just developed self hitting habit. We have a 4-month-old baby and he is home to take care of her around 2.5 days a week when I need to work.
He would yell at the air (when holding the baby) since the very beginning if the baby won’t stop crying. Today he texted me said he was going insane since our baby won’t stop crying. He said he was hitting his head with his hands and got a headache. I went back home for a bit to check to see if everything was ok and he was upset.
I do not know if this situation is bad enough for us to seek for counseling? as he only have been hitting himself for one time. (the other time he said he hit his head on the wall but then claimed it was a joke) I am concern about him yelling when baby crying though. Any suggestions?? He refused to put baby into daycare as well. I may not have perfect grammar since I am not a native speaker. Thank you all!!!!

[~Christina]

I would not be willing to leave a child with someone that is going to yell if a baby won’t stop crying , babies will do that , they are babies for gods sake.

I’d find other child care and go to couples therapy and he needs his own Therapist to help him with anger issues.

[healingme4me]

By all means if the sound of a baby crying is driving him to the brink of insanity, reach out for every and any service that you can find. My state has a 211 line to call, I don't imagine your state being any less progressive than the one I live in. You shouldn't have to worry about your child while at work. Does your baby have colic? Acid reflux? An allergy?

Can you sign up for a child care circuit?

What's going on with your husband? What's creating this overwhelming reaction from him? Is there any substance use with him? What type of work does he do?

[Skeezyks]

Hello Zkk: I'm sorry you & your husband are struggling with this most difficult situation. Caring for a newborn can stress even the calmest person. And if a person isn't used to being around babies, or if a person is anxious to begin with, it can be a really difficult situation.

Your husband's yelling while holding your baby certainly isn't doing your baby any good. And his hitting himself isn't good for him either. Plus I'd be concerned that his inability to cope with your baby's crying could potentially lead to something really serious such as your husband shaking the baby or even hitting her / him.

From my perspective, I think you must do whatever you can to resolve this situation as quickly as possible. Get your baby into some sort of child care. Or, alternatively, arrange for someone else in your family to care for your baby while you're at work or to at least be present when your husband is caring for your baby.

And, yes, it certainly wouldn't be a bad idea for your husband to seek counseling, or mental health therapy services, either. If your husband's lack of ability to tolerate your baby's crying escalates, & he physically hurts your baby out of frustration, it could potentially result in some serious consequences for all three of you. Please do whatever you have to do to resolve this situation as soon as possible.

I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I don't know, of course, if you're here simply seeking advice with regard to this particular concern or if you plan to continue posting. However, should you be planning to continue on (we hope you do)... may I suggest you introduce yourself over on PC's New Member Introductions forum? Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/new-...introductions/

There's a lot of support that can be available here on PC. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are the chat rooms where you'll be able to interact with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) So please keep posting!