Not gay but got accused... Again

You seem like a badass! Keep rocking it

@SorryShaped; Yes, but I WANTED to be a "girl."
I admire the women at work when they have just had their nails done with a new color or design. Or their hair styled/colored. I like feminine clothing, and jewelry. I just don't have a life that supports that.

You certainly deserve it! Find a way to get yourself some girly girl stuff and do some girly things. Be you for your own health and life. Being a badass is very attractive to me, by the way, but being able to wear a dress and paint your nails is certainly a thing you've earned. Don't deny your self. That's what this whole post worked me toward. Finally I got it.

I have the same problem. Except that I do wear makeup, and I do look feminine. But I'm very outspoken and independent. I've been told that I have a very masculine energy, and most people don't know what to do about it.

So I must be a lesbian.

My husband is straighter than a yardstick, and people have questioned him. Why? Because he is a good cook, doesn't like watching sports, and loves cats.

Hobbies, body language, appearance, etc., none of that makes a person gay, straight, or anything in between. The ONLY thing that decides whether a person is gay or straight is who they're sexually attracted to. But I suspect you knew that.

Also, ask anybody who's ever been bullied in school, and I'll bet most if not all will say that this bullying includes being accused of being gay. Tossing around homophobic slurs is a very common bullying and harassment technique. Which I think sucks. Could it be that people who are questioning you don't really think so, but are just saying it to be jerks or intimidate you for some reason?

It will be one hell of a hard time for someone to intimidate or bully me today. Been listening to some fairly violent music today, Puscifer, "the remedy," and really don't think I'll take crap anywhere. If a chick does that again I'll show em straight all right, smooches

I haven't read the whole thread, but I don't believe it's really an 'accusation' if someone thinks or comments or gossips that they believe you're gay. They're just saying, that's all. As misguided as their little judgments may be, I wouldn't consider it an accusation as such. If they were 'accusing' then that would just make them homophobes and not worth your time [unless you wanted to say something to them]. People think all kinds of crazy things, nothing's going to change that.

Just be yourself and move on. Who cares if they think you're a sword swallower? All it means is that you don't fit into the typical category of the "straight male" which honestly, is pretty damn boring.

I was talking to a few of the women in the hall before class tonight and asked if I give off that vibe. I got all no's but then when I asked the instructor as she came in, she said that she'd said partner in the "buddy" sense and did not say boyfriend. I distinctly remember she did but she was immediately on full-alarm and it was obvious so I didn't press it. She made several attempts to tell me that she didn't care in any regard what my preference or preferences were and that made no difference to her. I told her it didn't matter really, and to a point it's funny, but it's something that keeps happening and it's frustrating and I just want to get it sorted for my own self. I looked at my mannerisms tonight in the mirror and it's obvious. I look like a skinny gay guy. I make scrunch up my face when I talk about things I don't like. I show emotions, all of them, in my expression and body language I suppose the numbers I've gotten in my pockets before and the gay guys that did hit on me directly were because of how I behave. I'm in-between straight and flaming, but no steady place in there at all. I suppose it's just the way I am. I wasn't always though. At one point in life, I was very reserved, but it was because I was pressured to be that way. I guess I'm ok with being a straight guy that appears as gay. People.... I dunno about em.

It's not that I don't feel "deserving", it is that my life doesn't fit with all that. Ok. Nails. I love them. But I work production and my nails are very soft naturally and tear easily. Plus, I do manual labor, clean cages constantly (lots of pets), and any number of other jobs that would just ruin the manicure. As far as pretty clothes...where would I wear them? Walmart is about the only place I ever go that is considered "out". Imagine me wearing a nice dress mowing the lawn with dust flying everywhere! LOL!!

I don’t know what this is in response to, but I like the not taking any crap part.

Oy! Were you near, we would go anywhere you wanted to show off a pretty dress, if only as friends

My T gave me the best response, and it's both funny and true, "oh? I'm not gay. I'm more of a European."