I may meet a man this week

I scared my new man with my hypergraphia. I feel bad but invited him to breakfast on Saturday. I'm not sure he will come. I will wait for his answer. I want to make pancakes again, eat yogurt, mueslix cereal, banana, have coffee, and drink almond milk. Strange breakfast but this is what I want to eat with him. We shall see.

Well, he says he would come, but told me to not to eat too much. hahaha. He is saying I'm fat! ok! Well!! I'll try not to eat too much then. He means well but eating is my hobby- just kidding.

We met again. He ate breakfast with me then we went to the garden park and enjoyed the scenery. Since my father is coming, we won't see each other for two weeks. I will miss him!

IMO the most important is that you have an honest morally upright reason for whatever you do. At least that's what a woman wants. So if he's got only sex on the mind then he may not get far with you. Even a kiss should have meaning behind it.

So, we met again last weekend and had lunch together. He talked a lot and was happy. I was happy to listen. We had a good time together. Hopefully, we will meet again this weekend too.

I've read all your past posts and it sounds like he is a decent guy. Especially if he hasn't been pressuring you to have sex. The first date with my husband lasted about 10 hours as well. We just had so much to talk about. I wish you the best and keep us posted. Sounds like a great love story just take your time getting to know each other.

Thank you very much!! He comes over each weekend. We spend most of our time talking. We don't have sex. We kiss and hug occasionally. He is decent. I will continue seeing him. At times, I wonder if his meeting my parents would scare him. It probably would. They are not open-minded and are rather isolated. They don't like anybody I meet. They never accepted anybody I met as friends etc. I am hoping he does not want to meet my parents too soon. He did say he would meet my father when my father came. However, I did not want him to meet my father so soon because my father is not nice to anybody and would probably scare him. Eventually, I will ask my parents to meet him. For now I will be happy as it is.

I'm afraid it is over between us. I had a problem with my situation and asked him for help. He is reluctant to help me so he is no friend to me. I am ending it with him and am glad to have realized his true character. I need help and he said he would think about it. If he needs to think that hard about helping me then we are not friends.

I’m sorry but this doesn’t make sense. Everything was going so well as of yesterday and in less than 24 hrs you are willing to call it quits?
What is this problem that he won’t help you with?
Is it something where you need him to be there physically, mentally, emotionally?
What’s his reason why he can’t be there for you?
Does it interfere with his work schedule, or does it deviate from the regular meeting times you guys had prior to this problem arising?

I am impatient and am stressed out from my family's situation. I am giving him time to respond but am irritable from my own situation. I will give him the benefit of the doubt. I like him much but understand my illness and situation are blinding me from seeing him as he really is. I think he is having difficulty understanding what I wrote so am giving him time to read and think about it. I like him very much but am angry at my family for making me stressed out. I have no patience now with anybody but need to calm down. I will give him more time to respond and see what happens.

He sent me a smiley face. I don't know if he understood what I wrote or is telling me it is ok based on telling him that I did not want to let my situation interfere with our relationship. So, it's lost in translation so to speak. I will let it go for now. What else can I do?

I am unhappy with him and will let him go. I was using skype to contact him but changed my account and will no longer use the previous account. I know I sound nuts and probably am. However, I am not happy with him and really don't want to be bothered by him anymore. I feel he wanted to use me for speaking English and for free meals. I don't need him that much and realize that being alone is not that bad. I am free to do what I want and don't need a man to make me happy. I will keep busy with my tasks and job and be happy it was not any worse.

Well things can definitely get “lost in translation “ when It comes to written messages, whether it’s via texting or email. I read a little bit of your background with your parents. It sounds like a heavy situation. Timing is everything in relationships and perhaps it’s just not the right time for you right now to be in one. And that’s okay.
This guy obviously saw something valuable in you that he would drive to see you every weekend. If possible on your part try to have a conversation with him about it (in person preferably) and try to maintain a friendship with him. You never know what the future may hold.

I slept all day yesterday and feel much better now. Yesterday,he wished me well, but I was sleeping. I am still chatting with him on the same skype account. I feel rested now and feel we will overcome this situation. I will continue chatting with him and if he still wants to see me, we will meet again. I worked everyday last week and also on an emergency basis. It was stressful but I made it through somehow. This week I am hoping to have more days relaxing than working. I am hoping to see him again soon after relaxing some more. Thank you for your message!

Sounds like y'all bonded over racial stereotypes.

I’m thinking the same. It sounds like there is still communicating between you two, so I wanted to throw my two cents in.

Also, some people enjoy the thrill of the chase so it’s possible he’s doing that...there’s nothing inherently wrong with that, but if it’s leaving you hurt/confused...that may be a sign that they are manipulating you simply for their own pleasure at your expense. I don’t know if that’s the case, but sending positivity your way.

He and I are still chatting online. We are doing fine again. I realized he may not understand my long-winded text messages and am giving him time to read them and understand them. He is still caring and told me to watch out for the typhoon today. I do like him much and don't think my bad situation with my family and my feelings when I am stressed will be the indicator of my relationship with him. We are doing well again. I was very exhausted last week and needed to rest. I did and feel fine again. I realized he is good to me because he talks and listens. We have problems online when he does not understand what I wrote. Thus, he is not a bad person as I thought but a person who does not understand English too well. This is not his fault. I adore him still. He is special to me. I am hoping to see him again soon. I am blinded at times by my situation and can't judge others too well. My judgment is impaired from my illness. It takes me time and much reflection for me to understand that not all people are bad to me. He is really quiet most of the time and pensive. I like him much and hope we make it as a couple. He is not manipulative but has problems understanding English. So, he pauses and has to read and re-read then responds. I am trying to be patient and understanding. He is really trying hard to learn English. I admire him for his effort. He knows I like him much and care about him. Sometimes, this is more important than being able to communicate well in a language. This has been our first misunderstanding and we are doing well still. I am grateful for those who tell me to take it slowly and let our relationship grow steadily.

I can't criticize meeting your potential man online, because it worked out for me. However, there were a lot of lemons before I finally met the peach. Don't be afraid to let him go if you're not comfortable with the situaion. It would be better to be alone a little while longer than to be with someone who isn't right for you.

By the way, when my husband and I were just beginning to get to know each other online, we exchanged pictures. You know what really impressed me about him? In one of the pictures he sent me, he didn't have a shirt on. So he cut out a paper "shirt" and taped it to the photo before he scanned it. He knew it was too early in the relationship to start getting sexy.

I appreciated that bit of modesty and humility. It scored many more points with me than some guy strutting around like a rooster, trying to convince me he's God's gift to women, would have.

I'm having serious doubts about continuing the relationship again. For some reason, my gut feeling is telling me to let him go to allow him to find a woman whose family will accept him. My family will never accept him because they think I can't handle even taking care of myself. They are also mean and unable to deal with the fact that I like other people besides them. It is ok. I don't want him to deal with my family or lack of family. I may just let him go. I have the feeling that once he realizes my family will never accept him, he will be mean to me because I believe he is looking for a woman and family to accept him. He is not a bad man but once he realizes that I'm all alone with him he may change his attitude towards me. I feel bad about this whole situation. I knew my family would never accept anybody I like. Thus, I feel if I like him enough to let him go to find someone whose family will accept him. It is the right thing to do given he does not have much family either. I like him but not enough to leave my own family behind. I love my family because they are all that I have. They are dysfunctional but they took me back after I was homeless and after my divorce to someone they never accepted and who was abusive towards me. They stood by me throughout my hospitalizations. I'm worried about this man because he believes mental illness can be fixed by going on vacation and taking it easy. He does not have the slightest idea of how painful it is to have a mental illness. He thinks I have a slight problem being mentally ill. Little does he know that it is a big problem as it is for others. As a result, I feel he won't understand me and my problems. I think he is a nice man but his lack of understanding into my issues and my family's lack of acceptance of him are enough to think about letting him go to find someone whose family will accept him and allow him to be part of another family. I know if I were in his situation I would do this for me too. I feel nobody will be good enough for my family to accept and nobody will truly understand my needs. These are my issues I must face. I rather be alone and free and not worry about another person's feelings and treatment of me. I am leaning towards remaining alone and just dating occasionally for fun but nothing too serious. I wished it would have worked out with him. He has been the most decent towards me of all the men I have dated. But, I realize I can't change my family's attitude and his lack of understanding about mental illness. I am ok and will survive as usual. I was married to another mentally ill person who was severely paranoid and abusive. I liked him initially because he had a nice family unlike mine. But,his family turned against me when things went wrong and they blamed me for not taking care of him etc. I couldn't take care of him and myself and do a full-time job so it ended in divorce. I am happy to have divorced. I don't want to marry and divorce again though. It is too much trauma and sadness on top of all the stress. I will cut this short and let this man go. It is the best I can do for him given that I like him. I wish him well and hope he finds that special woman with an accepting family.

Can't you explain to him the dysfunction of your family and give him the choice to decide or not?

I lied. I am still chatting to him and invited him this Sunday to go to the park. I'm not sure if he will go. I like him much and will worry about my parents and him later. I am a bit nutty due to my illness. I can't help it. I should play the game does he love me or not. Ahhh, I am stupid!! May be, he will turn me down. Then, I will be at a loss. Hmmm, roller coaster ride of emotions is part of my illness as always. I wish I could stop the ride and just enjoy his friendship as it is for what it is. I feel ok but feel bad at times that nothing is ideal, especially with my family.

I sent this to him.
Mr. Big- to be with you

He has not responded yet since he is busy. I will wait until tomorrow. He works long hours on the weekdays and must be exhausted. If he does not want to see me, I will understand. But, so far, I believe he is too busy to answer and will soon.

He turned me down so it is over. I am not surprised. I will be ok. He sends me messages but does not want to see me. I will let him go. Thank you all for bearing with me and my emotions. I am not hurt but relieved. I hope he finds someone special.

I told him to remove me from contacts on skype. He has not done so yet. So, I told him that I would wait to meet him again one day, but to be nice if he finds someone else to tell me and let me go. I don't know what to expect but hope he does find someone good for him. I also hope to find someone who can understand me and care about me.