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  #1  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 04:10 PM
Anonymous50384
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I'm concerned with one of my workers. I noticed that she lies. Like a ton. I'm kind of sick of it. She's very nice. But I am just not sure what to do, if anything. Usually I just go along with it. But I am not stupid. I know when people are lying to me. Somethings she says are way too outlandish. And other things just seem very odd. It's about random everyday things. And also she tells tales. Ugh. I wouldn't want to get her fired. She's a good person. I'm not sure why she lies though. I feel like I can handle it but at the same time, I'm like, "this is so weird and I'm a little uncomfortable." I have said things to her before, jokingly, like "you're telling tales." Ugh. I wouldn't call her out on it because I get the feeling she might get mad. Ugh. She just left my apt. so that's why I'm bringing it up.

Here are some of the things she has said to me that I feel weird about:
-"I went over the high bar on the swings."
-"Doctors take classes in how to write bad signatures so their sig's aren't forged."
-"My family almost went over Niagara Falls in our boat."
-"That nursing home was closed (part of it) because they got a lot of complaints" (she didn't know I currently volunteer there and heard nothing of the sort about that.....)

I could go on.

She told me she passed from 7th to 9th grade, and then from 9th to 11th grade. She doesn't seem that bright though (no offense). She said she never took algebra but is good at geometry. I said: "how many degrees are in a right angle?" She said "36?"

Not to judge. I just am not sure if I should do anything about it. I wouldn't want to get her fired or in trouble. I'm just sick of her telling what seem to me bold faced tales.
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  #2  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 05:53 PM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
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Is she just playing around? Or wanted to see if you pay attention? Or she has some type of OCD? Or Tourette’s?
  #3  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 06:00 PM
Anonymous50384
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No, I've said to her before that she is full of it (in a joking way). She denies it though. I am kind of scared to call her on it directly. It would be too bad if she wanted to see if I pay attention. That would be weird. I don't know if she has OCD. She told me she is a clean freak (and cleans her toilet twice a day...lie? IDK). Tourette's? No.
  #4  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 06:04 PM
Anonymous40643
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I couldn't be around someone like that. It would drive me insane. I like honest people, not people who bs like that all the time. Not sure what to advise you... she seems a bit sick.
  #5  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 06:06 PM
Anonymous50384
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Yeah, I'm kind of concerned. I'm sick of it tonight. I don't choose friends like that either.
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  #6  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:08 PM
Anonymous47864
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KnitChick View Post
Yeah, I'm kind of concerned. I'm sick of it tonight. I don't choose friends like that either.

Ugh. I always feel unsettled and irritated when I’m around people who have issues that get under my skin... it’s like nails on a chalk board. I’ve learned to say very little around people who get to me like this. I don’t share anything about myself and I don’t encourage further conversation. I hope you can get away from her.
  #7  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 03:29 AM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KnitChick View Post
No, I've said to her before that she is full of it (in a joking way). She denies it though. I am kind of scared to call her on it directly. It would be too bad if she wanted to see if I pay attention. That would be weird. I don't know if she has OCD. She told me she is a clean freak (and cleans her toilet twice a day...lie? IDK). Tourette's? No.
That could true, about toilets. I clean toilet very often. When I have time, twice a day is not unusual for me.

Otherwise she must have some kind of compulsion to lies ( OCD doesn’t have to be about cleaning).

My brother had a colleague who routinely lied in the most fantastical ways. Like elaborate tales. Like such and such country he visited is a kingdom and their king is so and so and he met him and so on. When pointed out that it never was a kingdom and there is no king hed argue that there is. He made up new stories every day. They were harmless but bizarre.
  #8  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 05:54 AM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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You mentioned that she left your apt, is that apartment? And are you spending time outside of the workplace?

I'd limit my time with this person, if in your shoes.

Try saying at work, "sorry, no time for small talk right now." repeat as necessary.
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eskielover
  #9  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 06:44 AM
Anonymous50384
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Healing, she is a residential worker so comes to visit me at my apartment.
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healingme4me
  #10  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 06:54 AM
Anonymous50384
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Divine, I think what I was trying to get across is that I don't know what way is up or down with her because of the things she says. I'm not sure what her deal is.
  #11  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 07:54 AM
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seesaw seesaw is offline
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1. If she is a residential worker for you, perhaps make a note to her employer that she's having a lot of chit chat that is quite wild and bizarre and to ask them to address it with her.

2. You could always ask her to refrain from the chit chat.

3. You could also ignore her when she starts to tell tall tales. Change the subject. It will send the signal that you are not impressed.

Good luck!
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Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

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  #12  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 10:07 AM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KnitChick View Post
Divine, I think what I was trying to get across is that I don't know what way is up or down with her because of the things she says. I'm not sure what her deal is.
You’ll likely never find out what her deal is. You might need to address it with whoever is in charge. It’s a waste of your time if she comes over and tells stories.
Thanks for this!
Chyialee
  #13  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 10:14 AM
Anonymous50384
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Divine - I understand that I will not find out and also that I wouldn't be able to get her to change. I called her supervisor earlier about it who is going to call me back. It is not helpful to me and yes, it's a waste of my time.

Seesaw - thank you. I like those suggestions.
  #14  
Old Aug 13, 2018, 10:21 AM
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eskielover eskielover is offline
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I would limit my contact with her to work related issues. When she goes off on tales I would just ask if she was finished with the work related discussion & just say you have other priorities you have to take care of (even if that is just getting away from her)

Not much you can do about her lies & tales unless you talk with the person in charge of her. Pointing out her errors will just start an argument. Broken brains sometimes don't even see their own brokenness.
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  #15  
Old Aug 30, 2018, 01:21 PM
Anonymous50384
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She was my primary worker, and today I not only complained about her to her boss, but I said working with her does not feel healthy or helpful to me. She is being taken off my case.
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Thanks for this!
Chyialee
  #16  
Old Aug 30, 2018, 02:46 PM
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eskielover eskielover is offline
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So good to hear.....glad you handled it in a healthy way for you
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Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this.
Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018
  #17  
Old Aug 30, 2018, 04:11 PM
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s4ndm4n2006 s4ndm4n2006 is offline
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glad it got handled.
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