Is pushing yourself to date worth it?

I have a date tomorrow. To be honest, I'm just not feeling it. I chatted one time with this guy on POF. He gave me his number right away, which I thought was odd. I didn't give him mine till we chatted a little more. He asked me out on Thursday (first time we chatted), to go out on Sunday morning. Then he just kinda disappeared until he texted me this evening asking if we were still on. I tried to engage him in convo, asking how he was, and he just said "good. how are you?" I don't know. I don't feel up to going out with him tomorrow morning...
I think I'm going to cancel.

How's your outlook about relationships? If you feel like a SO would enhance your life experience at this point, then you should go for it! You'll never get your feet wet if you dont dip your toes in the water first... if you're not ready or think it may complicate matters to date at this point, then I would hold off. It sounds like you are hesitant of not only going out, but going out with this guy in particular. It IS important to feel ready to date and to want to put forth every effort in having a great experience. If you're not ready, that's okay. The time will come for you to WANT to go out. By then, your mind, heart, and mood will all be ready. :-)

Thank you, LostSoul! My outlook about relationships is that I'm all for them! I would love to have a SO. However, lately, I've been kind of blah about dating online. The other night, I went out with someone and it was disappointing. I also had been chatting with a different someone from POF, and I was sort of into him, though he was sending up red flags for me, and we are not talking anymore, so that was sort of disappointing too.

I think I'm sort of...dated out. Lol. I'm a little tired from it. And I don't feel like going through meeting someone again, and being disappointed. I also feel wary.

Thanks again.

It’s always best to listen to your own good judgment. I regret every time I don’t. I can understand your reservations with online dating. Maybe try joining some groups or new hobbies and meet people that way? Then either way you are likely to have a good time and not worry about whether you didn’t make a connection with someone... ? Best of luck.

I may still go out with him tomorrow. I'll see.

Awww, thanks Sisabel! I think that is a good idea, joining some groups that I have interest in. I'm in no rush to get married or find an SO.

I canceled with him.

I agree with Sisabel... I think it's best to try to meet people face to face with common interests. Unfortunately, progress in technology has made it so communication and discovery has become practically obsolete when dating. Today, instant communication brings the expectation of instant results. It's become less about finding common interests, manners, personalities, and beliefs, than trying to get the best profile selfie and 'witty' retortes. That's what scares me about dating soon, you can Be, Do, or Say ANYTHING online.

I guess my rant has gone on long enough... I apologize if I lost you at 'unfortunately', lol. The basis of my reply was to reinforce what Sisabel was saying about meeting in person. If you haven't heard of an app called Meetup, it takes your interests and matches them to groups that meet in your area. Then, you can pick and choose from a calendar of events to go to based on those interests. Think that might help?

Lol. I uncanceled with him. Lol. I guess I'm going on another date tomorrow.

edit: we just talked on the phone. I think I'm just nervous. makes sense. But I'm meeting up w/him tomorrow. .

That's good! If you are ready, willing, and able, you SHOULD go out. It's okay, natural, and expected to be nervous. Like I said in my previous reply...
You cant get you feet wet without putting your toes in the water first. Hope all goes well for you!

:-)

I would encourage you to date, even as just friends. People need interactions to be healthy in society.

Thank you for this, SS. I appreciate that reminder a lot.

I go back and forth on this. I tried dating for a while, but realized that I prefer to be single. It wasn't fair for me to lead people on. I still have friends I spend time with, but no one romantically.

Communication is good. Makes sense you wanted more information about him before going out to meet somebody you don’t know.

I'm a bit late to the party here, but always trust your gut. If your gut is telling you not to go then you don't have to go and it might be saving you from something. If it's just nerves like you think it is though, of course it's good to try to push past them like it seems you plan on doing. I hope things go well for you!

My intuition was right. We did not connect and he was kind of off-putting. Ugh. I erased his number right after I got in my car to leave. I would like a hug.

Sending you my hugs. They're a bit sweaty right now, sorry. I'm at the gym

*Hugs* Sorry it didn't go as well as you would've liked. Be prideful that you went out and tried though. Dating is kinda nerve-wracking these day, so much respect for the effort. :-)

I got so pissed for a little while. He had pressured me into talking about aspects of my life I'm not comfortable talking about. Like my disability and financial situation. Then he made fun of me for it. What a loser. I'm considering writing him a text just telling him that it was not ok of him. He had the ****ing gall to hug me at the end. Should I text him? Leave it? I would not read his response, if he did respond.

Let us know how the date goes!

I did end up messaging him. It was not scathing. Just feedback, because I thought he was rude and very off-putting. If he responds I will not read it.

Sometimes that's what you need... to get it out there. Rest assured, that it wasn't on you regarding his behavior, it is on him. It is good that you pointed it out to him though as to bring his attention to it and make him aware that his behavior was not only off-putting, but offensive as well. It's also good you kept yourself in check enough to come across as advising as opposed to berating. :-)

I dunno, I tried. I did capitalize the word never, as in "that is NEVER ok." But I did my best and now I'm done.

Ouch, sorry to hear it didn't go well. >.< What a jerk. But hey, at least you can be proud of yourself for getting out there, even when it was scary and didn't go well in the end.

Hi ShadowGX, thanks. It's ok. I am ok.