This hurts...

It's complicated. More complicated than I care to discuss fully.

I'm just hurting tonight. Watching my ex (of five years) sleep next to my best friend... it just ****ing hurts.

I've told them, since I found out he likes her, that they're also friends and I'm not gonna ruin that by getting my friend to quit talking to him. That'd be wrong, at least how I see it, it would be. The things he does for her, all of the **** he's willing to do, it's so much more than we ever had. God... I can't look at them without sending my mind into chaos.

I live with my friend, so it's nearly impossible to not be around him doting on her. I don't know how she feels about him, but she's not really even attempting to stop it from happening. Which leads me to believe that she likes him back on some level.

Today, I told my ex that I care about them both a lot and whatever happens, happens. I lied and said I'd be okay with it and that I'd just disappear for a while until I got my head on straight. I might end up living with some family half way across the country for a few months.

Holy **** I don’t believe anyone would not be cut in your situation.

What is he thinking and what is she thinking? This is one boundary that you simply don’t cross.

There’s no way if it were me I could live under the same roof. Can you look for a room share somewhere else?

I am so sorry that you are going through such a terrible thing. You do not deserve this, my friend.

I agree with Crazy Hitch. They are both simply wrong.

((((Sò leigheas)))) You're being treated horribly, in a way that you just don't deserve. I'm sorry you have to put up with this, as well. Is there any chance to look for another appartment? I'm so sorry, friend

I'm with Crazy Hitch here. Of course you said you're ok with it what are you supposed to initially say upon the initial shock of it all. However, do either one of them have no scruples? No sense of compassion? Empathy? Some sense of maybe this may be hurting you?

I'm trying to go about this without losing anyone. I don't think that's possible.

I can go back to my dad's where I just lay around and then chop wood. That's all my life would be. But maybe it's better than here.

"Staring at the moon, I know I'll be there soon. Luna forever."

I can't keep this up.

I don't think either of them realize how much I love them. It's the only reason I'm letting it take its course. Maybe they'll save each other. Maybe they'll complete each other so they don't need me anymore.

I’m utterly speechless.

(((((Só leigheas)))))



How can these people be so cruel?

She should move out.

If she doesn’t, and if okay, please tell us more about your thinking regarding where else you might live.

My heart goes out to you, Só leigheas.

WOW. I have never heard of such a thing in my whole life! How could your so called "friend" even do that to you?? And your ex?? I agree with the others! They have no scruples or morals!!!! That is plain WRONG. It's very admirable that you are trying to accept the unacceptable, but what they are doing is beyond my understanding and comprehension. You shouldn't have to move. I believe she should move if she is going to be with him. If it were me, I would want to cut off contact with both of them 100%.

This was the first I’ve read about your situation. Your #1 priority is YOU. There’s no good reason to be living with your ex and watching your best friend move in on him right under your nose. No wonder you are depressed!!! I suggest you move out and chop wood for a while. Let it get out all your anger. Then move somewhere else and start anew. Hugs.

The apartment's my friend's, not mine. I can't kick her out. Being honest, if I could I doubt I would.

I feel like I can't reach the spot on my back to pull out this damn knife.

I think I'm gonna try and confront them about this. Let them know that this is crossing a line they won't cross back over from if it continues.

Good for you!!

BC this is HORRIBLE relationship etiquette -- or just plain horrible Human Relations. Good fracking lord.

And AMEN to everything others said above. OP, you deserve consideration and respect for your feelings. This is NUTZ!

hugs;
Chyia, stone horrified

I concur!!!!

I told my friend what was up. Like I said, things are more complicated than I was able to convey here. Her and I talked some things through and I feel better about the situation. As for my ex, I'm still deciding if I should even give him the time of day.

I'm so sorry for this, it's a terrible, terrible situation. I think you should get those people out of your life somehow. You don't deserve to suffer like this.

Don’t give him the time of day.

(((((Só leigheas)))))

((((((((Só Leigh's)))))))
I'm so sorry. Can you tell him or her or both of them, what this is doing to you? Or can you get out of this situation (in a healthy way, like move out)? It's not fair to you, and you really need to take care of you.

I told my ex. Something tells me he doesn't really care what this has done to me. Meanwhile my friend actually listened and gave a ****. I think I know who I should keep in my life and who I shouldn't.

Good for you for speaking up about it. That's a huge step!

You did the right thing, and it seems that you've cleared the fog about this a bit.

GOOD. Glad you talked to your friend. She must have said things to help you feel better. I still hope she doesn't date your ex right now. That would be very rude and inconsiderate inho, but as long as YOU feel better, that's what matters the most. As far as your ex, I wouldn't give him the time of day.

I'm so sorry you went through that pain. They both are in the wrong for entertaining the idea of them dating and not considering your feelings in the matter. I'm glad your friend and roommate was considerate in listening to you. Hopefully she respects you. As for your ex, forget about him. He doesn't seem to give a care.

When I was talking with my friend, she made it clear that she'd told him to back off, especially since she also just had a breakup. I believe her and I know my mind was messing with me a bit on this subject, not completely because there was some stuff there, but I'm also suffering with getting to be severe paranoia.

As for my ex... I just can't hurt him. A part of me wants to, a part of me wants to verbally tear him a new one (maybe physically too). At the end of the day though, I still feel the need to protect him from harm. Regardless of what's going on with me, I can't just ignore five years of being this way. Ha, a part of me is still in love with him. Five years, and he just moves on....

I'm sorry.

(((( So leigheas ))))