Thanksgiving loneliness

Hi everyone. I am new here. I spent Thanksgiving alone due to my friends being unavailable and my inability to go to my brother's house because of his wife. Anyone else on here with dysfunctional family dynamics?

I think everyone here has some dysfunctional family dynamics in one form or another... I'm sorry that you spent Thanksgiving alone.

((((carriesiegel23)))) I'm sorry you're struggling If it can help a bit, you're not the only one in this situation. But we'll understand and listen here, if you want to talk and vent

Hello carriesiegel: Since this is your first post here on PC I thought I would welcome you to PsychCentral. You might consider introducing yourself over on PC's new members introductions forum. Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/new-...introductions/

And then here are links to 7 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on the subject of navigating family dynamics during the holidays:

10 Tips for Surviving Thanksgiving with the Dysfunctional Family

Holiday Feasts and Family Misbehavior

Talking Turkey: Managing Unhappy Relatives at Holiday Time

6 Tips for Dealing With Difficult Family During the Holidays

9 Ideas for Coping with the Holidays When You Have a Mental Illness

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/relat...-the-holidays/

https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhaust...dium=popular17

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

Being alone on a major holiday can be very depressing. I'm sorry you have family difficulties that have kept you alone. I remember a Thanksgiving when I was alone. Some friends who I thought would invite me over didn't and I felt hurt.

In-laws can be strange. One year, my sister invited me for Thanksgiving. Then I found out that her husband didn't want me there. We had not had a falling out or anything. But my sister withdrew her invitation. To this day, I do not know what her husband's problem was. But he would get mad, if she invited anyone without his permission. When I have visited my sister, I have felt like her husband was counting the minutes till I leave.

I hope the day comes when your family tensions ease up. We're here to listen, if you need to talk.

Sorry to hear it. I got invited (as I do every year) to my brother's wife's family dinner but honestly I don't know how much longer it can go on. It is horrible.

you never know who wants you there or why they ask or what one may say. Prefer to be alone than not wanted. so i will get my preference at xmas it seems. My folks are dead. friends will be with their families

The samething has kind of happened to me I won't go to my sons house anymore because of his wives family. They act like they think they are better then you. Every time I have been there they just look at you like well u r nothing so I told my son I will not be coming anymore of course I could never tell him it was because of his wives family makes me feel so uncomfortable,His wife sometimes can be very annoying hey sometimes she wont even say hi to me then there are other times like today when they came to my house she actually gave me a hug and a kiss. At least I got to see my two beautiful grandchildren. I like my son's wife
s mom but she shows up after I am getting ready to leave and with my mom's passing this year I would not feel very comfortable with nobody to talk to,my son is quiet too.

Nothing like the 'holidays' to bring out all those feelings. I was trying to keep up the thing with my dysfunctional family 'for my kids' but, wow, now that they're teenagers, we just say no thanks, and we do what we want.
I would rather do something simple and be happy than to have to participate with those folks I call my family. So much trouble.
Just remember, its only one holiday out of the many that you'll get to create in your life.

Maybe one of my thatkfuls is that I no longer have family to spend holidays with. My daughter is my only family left & she lives 1100 miles away & neither of us has money to travel.

I have spent many alone holidays with my doggiez on my farm over the last 11 years & I love that just as much as being invited to friends for dinner though I enjoy that too.

I didn't know anyone when I moved here & was so amazed when a family on a farm down the road stopped by with a plate full of thanksgiving goodies & a whole pumpkin pie. Talk about feeling blessed. This community has accepted me & now I have friends who are better than family ever was & more like the family I always wished I had. But I still love having my alone time spent with my awesome fur-baby family

I know that Thanksgiving has now since passed but Christmas is on the way. I have a few suggestions:

Firstly, I think it very important that you celebrate the holidays on your own terms. This means making new traditions. Would inviting someone to spend time with you be difficult? You need not put on a dinner but what about candy canes and hot cocoa one night.

Can you volunteer for an organisation or event? I volunteered for years at my local museum's two week long tree festival. I got to meet some very nice people and at the end of it all we had a very nice gathering to celebrate. I also volunteered for the local food bank preparing and handing out hampers (it just so happened I needed one myself).

You need not be alone. You can be in control of your holidays.