[Gymgirl71]

Had a really unnecessary fight last week. My boyfriend opened up about his past relationships and I realized what happened during our fight was a trigger for him, and made him feel unsafe. He has done a 360 where most of his energy is on himself and we see eachother basically once a week now on the weekend...i have agreed to change my behavior but I’m disappointed in myself for losing control of my emotions and right now our relationship isn’t the same. He has been under a lot of stress lately and I didn’t make things better for him. I want things to get better so we can be close again

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Gymgirl71 Relationships can be complicated. The good news is that at leas you know why he got angry in the first place. I'd suggest to just be there for him. Remind him that you're there to support him. Listen to what he has to say if he wants to vent. Just be supportive. Try not to insist too much, otherwise he'll be put off by this behavior. Hopefully he'll come back to you, but it will take time. Just be patient. Hopefully he'll come back when he feels less stressed out. Please don't be so hard on yourself. It's not your fault. Relationships are hard to deal with. What matters is that you've recognized your mistakes and that now you're trying to fix them. Good for you! Be proud of yourself for that. I'm so sorry, I know it's hard. Please don't give up. I hope things will get better soon for you and your boyfriend. Is there anything we can do to help you? Please let us know. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this

[sarahsweets]

Originally Posted by Gymgirl71

Had a really unnecessary fight last week. My boyfriend opened up about his past relationships and I realized what happened during our fight was a trigger for him, and made him feel unsafe.

Are you able to say kinda what happened here?

He has done a 360 where most of his energy is on himself and we see eachother basically once a week now on the weekend..

Because of this fight or is this an in general thing?

.i have agreed to change my behavior but I’m disappointed in myself for losing control of my emotions and right now our relationship isn’t the same. He has been under a lot of stress lately and I didn’t make things better for him. I want things to get better so we can be close again

Since I do not know what the fight was about its hard to give my precise opinion but it seems like you are taking a lot of blame for whatever happened and I am not so sure you have to.

[Gymgirl71]

We had a nice Valentine’s Day...he also had a stressful week and was tired that night. In the morning I approached it wrong in an accusatory way, but I had wanted him to be more affectionate so then he felt pressured.

[Gymgirl71]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Gymgirl71 Relationships can be complicated. The good news is that at leas you know why he got angry in the first place. I'd suggest to just be there for him. Remind him that you're there to support him. Listen to what he has to say if he wants to vent. Just be supportive. Try not to insist too much, otherwise he'll be put off by this behavior. Hopefully he'll come back to you, but it will take time. Just be patient. Hopefully he'll come back when he feels less stressed out. Please don't be so hard on yourself. It's not your fault. Relationships are hard to deal with. What matters is that you've recognized your mistakes and that now you're trying to fix them. Good for you! Be proud of yourself for that. I'm so sorry, I know it's hard. Please don't give up. I hope things will get better soon for you and your boyfriend. Is there anything we can do to help you? Please let us know. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this

yes I realize it will take time and patience. Pressure makes him go into his man cave as they call it. So, I’m going to let him take the lead for a while

It may just be that he is less emotionally-dependent on you than you are on him. So maybe there is a mismatch there and the balancing act will take some time.