[pheonixashes]

My husband and I have hit a rough patch. By rough patch I mean he's saying he doesn't see a future for for us. I'm so confused because he was offended when I asked if he wanted a divorce. Said I'm still his wife and he doesn't want me out of his life. He's recently confessed to using marijuana daily for weeks now just to be around me. I asked if he wanted to try couples counseling and he said no. Tonight he started to get rude and defensive during a casual conversation when there was no call for it. I have nowhere to go if I leave. We agreed to work this out but tonight is leaving me feeling hopeless. He's supposed to be going to counseling to work on his personal issues outside of our issues, but I don't think he ever went to his first appointment. I feel so lost.

[sarahsweets]

First of all you do not have to leave- let him. I am sorry about things but getting rid of the hateful, racial stuff I am not sure you can cohabitate after the reality show is over.

Even if you pursue a divorce, if you have no where to go--do not leave! Everything you own is half yours and "possession is 9/10s of the law." Divorce is a big deal and of course asking for one will effect your relationship. It hurts when our partners don't want us or are irritable.

While it's unfortunate your husband missed his counseling appointment, I think you should consider getting counseling to. Your relationship is already rough and if you go through with a divorce, it may get worse. Also, make sure you have your own bank account, phone, etc before taking any concrete actions.

Since you are confused, I am not trying to say whether you should divorce or not. It is a big decision.

[Fuzzybear]