Unwanted opinions & advice

Real friends will not walk away from the friendship just because you politely set boundaries.

You can always limit the amount of personal information you share with others.

People need to stay the F out of other people's business- there are times where I have said that too.

I like the suggestion of "can we just drop this topic and talk about other things". It wouldn't work with heavily critical, self-righteous people, but it's useful for redirecting a situation. It gives a clear indication without being controlling or aggressive. I could use this, thank you SilverTrees.

People do apply their own life formula to other people. Sometimes it's cultural, or thoughtlessness: I get the marriage question persistently and predictably from certain cultural groups. Sometimes I think that it's because I've over-shared emotionally and people are uncomfortable with not knowing how to respond. For them, giving advice switches back into the ego mode: I'm guilty of doing that. In fact I think conversations with strangers can either be uncomfortably boundary-breaking emotional, or uncomfortably ego-centric. Hard to hold the delicate balance in the middle.

I like the suggestions of saying, 'I appreciate that you are trying to help, but... please don't'.

Interesting that this makes you nauseous @SilverTrees. It would be good for me to allow myself to feel the nausea rather than switching off in this type of situation.

I agree. I think this is an excellent way to put a stop to the discussion.

If you are sensitive to criticism and unwanted advice and opinions, you feel how you feel. Some people here said that's something you may want to change about yourself. I disagree. I think you can find ways to cope. That's what I do. There is nothing wrong with having a sensitivity. And unsolicited and unwanted advice and opinions are annoying. They can even be upsetting depending on how its delivered. I often don't get this crap in real life. Its more online, so I take measures to protect myself, like blocking the person. Doesn't mean I don't like them or have some sort of vendetta. I just know myself and when someone is repeatedly upsetting to me, well, bye bye. In real life though, I CAN think of some times. Like family things. I felt criticized by some extended family about my financial status for a while and this person was violating my boundaries after my saying that I wasn't comfortable talking about it. I ended up sending him and his wife, my aunt, a letter about how their unwanted comments make me feel, and telling them what I wanted. For them to stop. It worked. You don't have to go into personal specifics to set boundaries Sisabel. I wish you luck.