[evildouble102]

I thought my boyfriend was being an %#@&#! but he gave me a christmas gift tonight with the story that he was being a jerk to distance himself from me supposedly because He was making this very pretty Jewelry box. Should I buy it, the story? Part of me wants to but I'm cautious.... the first time we slept together he told my mother he slept in my bed or something like to that affect. so maybe he's for real. Feedback would be great. Thanks, Danielle

[Perna]

Well, first off, is the jewelry box handmade? :-) Why did he give it to you now instead of apologizing and getting your relationship right first and then giving you a present. I don't think being a jerk should have "excuses" especially "good," convenient ones.

I'd tell him the gift is nice, if early but a better gift would have been his respectful behavior toward you?

[AAAAA]

Perhaps I'm too cynical evil, I am positive that a person can carry out a Christmas surpise without acting like a jerk. Unless by jerk you mean that he's been too busy to spend time with you lately because he'd been working on the jewlery box, that's believable.

I would certainly with a man discussing our personal life with my mother. Did I misunderstand that part?

[evildouble102]

He actually had apologized profusely for his misbehavior; but, he can't keep secrets so this was his idea of distancing from me so he wouldn't tell; like when the first time he slept over he told my mom; which I know I'm 23 but still my mom doesn't need to know lol.

[evildouble102]

He worked on it while at his day program. I'm confused what ur asking about him telling my mom... I think when he said something he kinda what o no lol. I refused to spend time with him for quite a while beforehand because he was acting like a jerk but when I finally did decide to give him another chance it was just like we left off minus the jerk part. He said he had been praying to his deceased father that we could atleast talk and give the relationship another try.... I made a big mistake about telling my Dad about some stuff my mom heard about him. She heard Joey was a sexual deviant and how he was just obsessed with getting women pregnant and used his seizures as an excuse to touch womens breasts and what not. I have not seen this but was feeling angry at the time and told him this which I guess is really a rumor but when I told my dad about that he had been around and about the gift, he says he's a good one to stay away from

[Perna]

If he worked on it at his day program, I take it he was a jerk only so he wouldn't tell? I sort of get that but what do you mean by "jerk"? Was he just preocuppied and just wouldn't talk to you or was he on the offensive and deliberately starting things?

I guess I would take all the things you hear about him with a grain of salt but keep them in the back of your mind in case some behaviors come up that you're not sure of. The being a jerk/apologizing thing is not a very good start? I could see someone like that "blaming" his seizures for not being in control of his actions, etc. I'd just keep things in mind and only let him make a couple more mistakes before I decided he might be more trouble than he is worth?

[salukigirl]

im totally confused about this whole story.

why would someone have to be a jerk to keep a secret? my boyfriend has done stuff like that where he has bought me a present and kept it a secret but he was never a jerk "to distance himself". this whole thing just sounds very very odd and it feels like were missing part of the equation. mostly on how hes a jerk.

if youre dad says stay away then i would trust your dad. i wish i would have listened to my family when they told me to stay away from my ex boyfriend. hence, he is now my ex.

[Sultrysorrow]

You know some people are just terrible at having tact. Maybe you should cut your boyfriend a break. And seriously thing about all the situations that might have made him a jerk at the time. If it's something that's hand-crafted then It's honestly from the heart. And you should embrace it. Gifts that people put their talent into are timeless...

[evildouble102]

He was a jerk in pushing me away for several weeks. I don't agree with my father because he's never met my boyfriend. I agree that I should be cautious and be limited on mistakes for fear of being hurt. Not sure this answers all questions..... He just said he had to stay away so he wouldn't blab or tell me what he was working on; what makes it more from the heart is that he has cerebal palsy so he can really only use one hand primarily to make things but he doesn't let his disability get him down and that makes me proud and feel special, etc.

[evildouble102]

Long story short we are no longer a couple.. he was the one to say lets just be friends on the phone because he spent the day in my apartment bc I was late for work and didn't have time for him to get dressed before I left; so apparently he used my computer to talk to other woman so screw it. It feels like (whether she meant it or not) my mom is rubbing salt in the wound kinda saying I told u so.

[AAAAA]

I'm really sorry to hear that things didn't work out evil! I'm more sorry that you don't feel that your mother is very supportive!