Arguing in relationships - what's normal?

I am not sure what’s normal.

I’d say lots of people probably do like to argue, otherwise you’d never get anyone to argue with you.

No, come on. You're probably a pretty nice guy in real life but it's just the arguing where things go a bit haywire. Don't be so hard on yourself.

Apologies for the delayed response. I had things to do.

Yeah, I notice when people are getting uncomfortable, and I'm capable of pulling back somewhat. But it'd be interesting to know their perspective, or why they get so uncomfortable.

For example, I have two friends, one of whom is much more domineering, whereas the other is quite passive. The more domineering one pretty much steamrolls over the other such that she's now pressured her into living a lifestyle that has put her into financial debt, yet the passive friend still won't stand up for herself. I don't understand that. I'd like to, partially so that I could offer her some advice which might actually stick, or just in general because I'm curious.

I've been told on several occasions by various people in my life that they refuse to argue with me anymore because it distresses them.

No no. I'm an asshole. It's important we not deceive ourselves.

[QUOTE=theoretical;
I've been told on several occasions by various people in my life that they refuse to argue with me anymore because it distresses them.

.[/QUOTE]

That makes sense.

I am just saying there must be people out there who do like to argue otherwise you’d not find anyone to argue with. People either find it distressing or not interesting for them so they don’t want to argue, but some people might enjoy it like you do.

Some couples actually like drama and seek conflict. I find concept of make up sex ridiculous but it seems to be somewhat common?

You just have to find like minded lovers of a fight lol there are out there. I’d not worry about what’s normal in a relationship but just focus on finding right match. That would be “your normal”.

I’d warn against raising children in argumentative household as it’s not healthy for kids but two or however many consenting adults could fight to their heart content!

Well, we're all a-holes brother, in one way or another. I just think try to be nice - and that takes effort, work, - but accept in your fellow man b.s., just as you accept it in yourself. Grow is my main message.