So I’ve been in and out of group homes since I was 16, but the last one I was at was my favorite. Although it was expensive and they didn’t allow me to keep my SNAP (food stamps) I had lots of great room mates, wonderful staff and really felt like I was well cared for there. I wanted to move out on my own, admittedly because I wanted to try and have a baby (I lost a daughter to stillbirth in 2016) so at the end of February, I moved into my own apartment that I had been on the wait list for months.

This was my very first time living completely on my own, not with room mates or family. I was in and out of the psych hospital for the first few weeks because I found it very difficult to cope and I dealt with some psychosis and suicidal thoughts as well. Now I’ve been able to stay out for over a month and I’m somewhat getting used to being alone but it’s very difficult. I’m naturally a very quiet and reclusive person so I NEVER make the first move socially. That’s why it would be difficult for me to join a group or club and follow through. But the emptiness I feel not having the support I need is devastating.

I feel like my life is hollow and has no meaning. I miss the group home because it gave me stability and support. Now I have no one to support me and make sure I care for myself. I did ask them if I could return during a hospital stay and they said no because I’m too high functioning. But I recently sent an appeal email to the director and the supervisor of the program fully explaining my situation and why I feel I need to be allowed back. I haven’t gotten a reply, and I’m not optimistic about it.

The biggest issue here is that I went from having 100% support and guidance to basically having 0. A better step down would’ve been going to the program’s independent branch, but they require one to be out of the hospital for 6 months to qualify. I wish I had stayed at the group home and stayed out of the hospital, then gone there. Then at least I’d have more support than I do now. I’m not willing to consider other group homes because they are either more restrictive than the one I was at or they aren’t in the city I want to stay in. I’ve discussed this with my hospital social workers.

Basically any type of advice on how to deal with this feeling would be appreciated.

I can imagine how hard it would be to go from 100 to 0 support-wise. That's a hard transition.

I would recommend leaning on your community resources. You may not have a group home right now, but maybe there are other supports / people in your community who can help you get your needs met. For instance, a warm line that you could call daily to talk about what stresses you, Google mental health services and organizations in your area and then if they offer services you might want, apply for them.

Are there specifics that you're struggling with? Like Buying groceries? Cleaning? Taking meds? General stress and loneliness?

If you're struggling emotionally, there's lots of ways to cope. Firstly, pause and give this time. Change is hard but we also adapt to it. 2. I really like to, when I'm just inconsolable and want to wallow, wrap myself in a blanket and listen to music for a little while. 3. Distract yourself by doing a puzzle, reading, watching a movie, something u enjoy, 4. Connect with or,just find a way to be around others. Its hard during this time. But if there's anyone you have kept in touch w, maybe reach out to ask how they are. They may be struggling too and appreciate your asking. 5. Consider if the way you are thinking about your sitch is helpful or not. 6. Sometimes in dark moments people look to a higher power. If that might feel like your thing, try it out. Or try mindfulness.

Lastly, a hug: I'm glad you reached out here. I hope things get better for you soon iphone.

[Bill3]

[Aviza]

Talk with your social worker about getting you an arms worker. You need mire support but you don't need a group home. Your social worker is key to getting you the support you need.

Update: I talked to the director today, he said he’s going to discuss it with the rest of the team and see what they think. Another option may be for me to go directly to their independent program, but we’ll see.

[*Beth*]

First of all, I am so, so sorry about your baby. What a painful loss that must have been.

I hope you will be accepted into the independent program. That way, you'd have community and support.