[bpforever1]

I met someone online on Valentine's Day! He is nice and healthy. He is about 13 years older and divorced. He wants to do activities with me!! We are meeting in two days. I was not expecting to meet anybody decent from online dating apps but he is so far intriguing and really decent. I am happy. The other men I've met in person wanted sex so I had to turn it down. I know some people are not dating because of covid-19. I wear a mask while talking so it is not a problem so far. I really look forward to meeting him!! He wants to do many things with me but we first have to meet in person to see how it goes. We are meeting for lunch. I am hoping for the best!

[Mion]

I hope it goes well for you. I hope you are careful and on guard, even though you said he's a decent man.

Good for you, however...

Originally Posted by bpforever1

The other men I've met in person wanted sex so I had to turn it down!

How do you know he's not any different?

[MickeyCheeky]

Really happy for you! i agree with the other wise and wonderful posters about being careful though! Please do keep us updated! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @bpforever1, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

[AzulOscuro]

Don’t forget to meet him in a public place and let some people in your life know where you are going to be. Take it easy. All the time you need to meet him, don’t feel yourself pressured. I wish you very luck!

[bpforever1]

So, we met for lunch at a restaurant! And, we clicked!! We are meeting again on Sunday!! Thank you all for your messages!

[*Beth*]

How exciting! Enjoy, and I hope you have loads of fun times ahead of you.

[bpforever1]

He met another woman and had sex with her. But, he still says he likes me!! WHAT! I was happy without him and will be ok still without him!!

[buddha1too]

I'm so sorry, bpforever1. Your attitude about it sounds very healthy, though. At least you didn't have to wait long to discover his nature. Hang in there.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by bpforever1

He met another woman and had sex with her. But, he still says he likes me!! WHAT! I was happy without him and will be ok still without him!!

I want and aim to be compassionate without judgement, but I am straightforward and honest with what I am about to say. It may sound harsh to you, but I am not trying to be harsh.

You meet all these men online, get very excited by them immediately, claim how happy you are with them within one day's time and without knowing them at all, then they do something to hurt, betray or seriously disappoint you in some way - each and every time.

Many members have cautioned you around this, yet you ignore all advice given and do as you please. And you keep repeating the same mistake over and over again.

It's hard to understand why you don't listen to the wise words of caution from everyone... or most who post in reply. Then it's also very hard to understand what you really want out of each thread?

Most members keep advising you to slow way down. You get overly excited about each man you meet SO QUICKLY. And then just as quickly, you have to dump them, or they've dumped you, and you have to move on. See the pattern here?

[divine1966]

What a loser. After just one date he thinks it’s appropriate to tell you he had sex with someone. Who even cares? Good riddance

[AzulOscuro]

Thanks god, he showed up his true intentions from the beginning. It will save time for you.

[bpforever1]

Well, I met someone I was in contact for over 6 months online. We met for the first time and hit it off. I was not feeling too well though because I drank some alcohol and asked him to let me go home which he did. He is from a similar background so we are more compatible. We are meeting tomorrow and I am hoping for the best. The other man wants to remain in contact and admitted he slept with the other woman. What a jerk!! lol, I believe things won't go well for him and her. But, this is none of my business. Thank you all for your messages!

[bpforever1]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

I want and aim to be compassionate without judgement, but I am straightforward and honest with what I am about to say. It may sound harsh to you, but I am not trying to be harsh.

You meet all these men online, get very excited by them immediately, claim how happy you are with them within one day's time and without knowing them at all, then they do something to hurt, betray or seriously disappoint you in some way - each and every time.

Many members have cautioned you around this, yet you ignore all advice given and do as you please. And you keep repeating the same mistake over and over again.

It's hard to understand why you don't listen to the wise words of caution from everyone... or most who post in reply. Then it's also very hard to understand what you really want out of each thread?

Most members keep advising you to slow way down. You get overly excited about each man you meet SO QUICKLY. And then just as quickly, you have to dump them, or they've dumped you, and you have to move on. See the pattern here?

Dear Have Hope,

Unfortunately, these are the times which online dating apps are being used by men seeking hookups. I did not sleep with this man so am happy it is over! I did not get hurt too much. And, I found someone else who I have been in contact with over 6 months. He is more like me so I believe it will work out. The man who slept with other woman has been married several times so his track record is not good. The new man is from my area in the USA and is American and the same ethnicity. So, he likes me a lot, and I like him as a person. I have talked with him off and on for awhile and sort of know him personally. So, I am happy we met finally. I am also sorry to hear your relationship is not doing well. I know how it is to divorce. So, please hang in there and try not to become bitter. Take care and best wishes!

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by bpforever1

Dear Have Hope,

Unfortunately, these are the times which online dating apps are being used by men seeking hookups. I did not sleep with this man so am happy it is over! I did not get hurt too much. And, I found someone else who I have been in contact with over 6 months. He is more like me so I believe it will work out. The man who slept with other woman has been married several times so his track record is not good. The new man is from my area in the USA and is American and the same ethnicity. So, he likes me a lot, and I like him as a person. I have talked with him off and on for awhile and sort of know him personally. So, I am happy we met finally. I am also sorry to hear your relationship is not doing well. I know how it is to divorce. So, please hang in there and try not to become bitter. Take care and best wishes!

@bpforever1, thank you very much about my divorce. The good news is, I am no longer bitter.

I am very glad to hear this news of a guy you like and have been talking to for 6 months! That's great to hear, and I hope you pursue that, if he is indeed a good person for you. I hope things work out with him, and I wish you all the best as well!

[bpforever1]

We met again and are doing well. He likes me a lot. We had a nice dinner and talked for hours. I hope we continue seeing each other.

[buddha1too]

"Kids these days!" (He said in his best old man voice!) I don't even remember how we ever hooked up in the B.C. (Before Computer) era!

[Open Eyes]

I give you credit for "trying". I can't imagine looking for someone to romantically connect with online tbh. I imagine it must be a bit of an emotional drain.

[Breaking Dawn]

Hi, @bpforever1! I'm glad to hear you are out & about & doing well. You seem to be following your instincts & learning lots of things about yourself & others. Good luck with everything in your life! You work so hard & deserve some fun & to find a good relationship eventually. Hugs & love to you!!

[bpforever1]

I think Have Hope has a point. I ended it with the old man who took me out and was nice to me. He kept trying to have sex with me. I liked him as a person but did not feel any attraction to him as a man. So, I ended it.

I also did not like his mentality. He is half-Asian and said he does not identify with Asians. He also said he never liked Asian women before, so why is he in Asia? He sounded screwed up in the head so it irritated me. He was ok but he is not attractive at all then he brought up these identity issues. He is close to 70 years old and has identity issues? I also knew he would rape me eventually because he kept trying to have sex with me.

Today, he was at the park I walk. He is supposed to be working today. He thought I would say something, but I ignored him. He does not live in the area and lives about an hour away. He is stalking me. I am fed up with him and will have to report him to the police if it gets out of hand. This is a nightmare!

I think I must have a problem but finally after dating many men from online dating apps I realize that they all want sex. So, if I want sex, I will go out again with a nice hot-looking younger man who makes me feel on fire, instead of an old toad with some identity issues. I learned my lesson hopefully. And, I need to just be alone for awhile and work on myself.

Thank you all for your messages!

[Open Eyes]

It sounds like there are a lot of problem people with these online dating sites. I noticed they also tend to hang out at bars/clubs too. They tend to look for easy routes when it comes to meeting others.

I think it's better to look in a more community type environment. These bars and dating sites are not "community" environments and a person is more apt to get singled out as you have mentioned where it's just you and that person. This sets the atmosphere of being singled out right off the bat without seeing how the person interacts in a more community type atmosphere. You are more apt to get a loner looking for someone they can isolate and control.

[AzulOscuro]

Originally Posted by bpforever1

I think Have Hope has a point. I ended it with the old man who took me out and was nice to me. He kept trying to have sex with me. I liked him as a person but did not feel any attraction to him as a man. So, I ended it.

I also did not like his mentality. He is half-Asian and said he does not identify with Asians. He also said he never liked Asian women before, so why is he in Asia? He sounded screwed up in the head so it irritated me. He was ok but he is not attractive at all then he brought up these identity issues. He is close to 70 years old and has identity issues? I also knew he would rape me eventually because he kept trying to have sex with me.

Today, he was at the park I walk. He is supposed to be working today. He thought I would say something, but I ignored him. He does not live in the area and lives about an hour away. He is stalking me. I am fed up with him and will have to report him to the police if it gets out of hand. This is a nightmare!

I think I must have a problem but finally after dating many men from online dating apps I realize that they all want sex. So, if I want sex, I will go out again with a nice hot-looking younger man who makes me feel on fire, instead of an old toad with some identity issues. I learned my lesson hopefully. And, I need to just be alone for awhile and work on myself.

Thank you all for your messages!

It’s weird and scary. Be very cautious, hope this guy leaves you alone.

[divine1966]

He lives an hour away but shows up where you go for walks? So fishy. If he keeps bothering, you maybe telling police isn’t a bad idea. Be safe.

[Damiannt]

All these online apps are not working as we expect them to work, probably because of the people there, maybe because of us being naive...

[wolftrap]

Hi - the reason online dating doesn't work is because the matching method is algorithms, and algorithms are too simplistic to match two complex human beings. This is a good article to read about this topic: Attention Required! | Cloudflare.


The article concludes that it is more effective to spend the time meeting people - good old fashion meet people who know people dating. Course, that's not an option right now, and many of us may be shy or wary of this. But, I think the human algorithm is probably more successful than the computer algorithm.