[SarahT]

i have been dating a great guy for about a year now. I am 31 and have made many mistakes in my past so I feel blessed to meet a man that is so caring. The only problem is he is depressed and is going to seek a therapist in the next 3 weeks but all of a sudden over the last month I have lost any desire to see him. I make excuses all of the time and it is really taking a toll on us. A little background about me: I am very ambitious, work all of the time and like to go out to have fun every once in awhile. He on the other hand is content where he is in life, never likes to leave his house and suffers from depression which he is finally going to get help for.

Has anyone ever had this happen to them?

[trippinmickey]

Just dump him ~Im sure he is use to people who say they care about him walking away when times get hard .Most people with a metal illness are use to having friends, family love ones turn their backs on them .So go ahead think about your self you are what matters the most.

[TaintedGoth1]

I wouldn't leave him just yet. I'd take a look into why you are feeling this way. Have you tried to be honest and direct with him? Tell him how you've been feeling???

[SarahT]

I don't want to just dump him!! I care about him deeply and do love him. I took 4 years off from dating until I could meet someone that I actually trusted with my heart and I found it. I am just trying to find out how long someone should stick by their side if you don't see any improvement.

[sunrise]

Sarah, it's a really good sign he is recognizing he is depressed and going to get help for it by seeing a therapist. That is huge! Tell him how great that is! You seem to be saying you haven't seen any improvement yet, but he hasn't even begun therapy. Why don't you tell him how glad you are he is getting help and give therapy a chance to work before writing him off?

[Perna]

Do you all have the same style; help with his depression isn't going to make him a different man who loves going out? I don't know if what you like to do is going to be the sort of thing he likes to do; I would discuss that with him. It's great he is getting help for his depression but that's not going to change who he is. If you all's likes don't match, that's a whole different story, not necessarily related to the depression.

[chaotic13]

I would look very hard at what you are feeling and why. Your lack of interest in seeing him and making excuses suggests that at least some part of you is not happy. I'd recommend that you focus on this while he is getting help for his depression.

[anabel42]

I would definately give him a chance. My boyfriend broke up with me, probably because I'm so depressed, and it's so hard to deal with. Recovery is long and hard, and he is going to need someone who cares about him that he can trust. It will make his life so much better. And I think life is about trying to make the lives of others better. Good luck, and I hope he is getting better!

[nightbird]

the fact that he is seeking therapy for his depression is great - how many Guys do you know who will do that without the sky falling down on them?

he seems worth looking into a bit further.

he may be depressed, but he's damn sure smart!

you may want to ck out what depression is, and your obvious repellant 'thing' going on.

could be because he's vulnerable?

and you have every right to love whoever you please, so think about when this Guy is on his feet will you waltz back in, (if you leave) - that would be awful, see?