[Blades]

I have currently been working on a new short poem for my girlfriend, Mandy and I would appreciate some opinions on it before I give it to her as I haven’t written many poems for quite a while and I am only now getting over writer’s block. Do you think this poem is cute or corny?

I want to be the pillow that you sleep on
The blanket that keeps you warm
The sweet melody that sings you to sleep
And the dream that you see
Each time you close your precious eyes

[afterrain]

I like it, it is very nice poem.

[RomanSunburn]

I think it's very sweet. I took a couple poetry classes when I was in school (I'll probably take a couple more when I go back!) and one thing that has kind of stuck with me was that the way to become a better poet is to read a lot of poetry. If you're having trouble with writers block, try checking out some books from the library. Pablo Neruda has some amazing love poems, but I also really like the romantics as well.

When I write poetry, it can take me months. I do a first draft, then I go back when it's cold and change it up a little, figure out what sounds better. Poetry can't be rushed

[Night*Blossum]

Awww. I think it's soo sweet ^_^ I wish I can write poetry like this. <3

[eskielover]

That is very nice......it's always an appreciated feeling when someone gives something so personal of themselves to the other.

I had several guy friends when I was in college. One was great at poetry & wrote me a very sweet poem....another guy friend had problems with his hearing....difficult thing being a music major. I was there as a friend for him through his rough times & he wrote a magnificent composition while being deaf that he dedicated to me & gave me the score for it at the original composition workshop. I wasn't a GF sort of friend to either....just a good friend. I felt so honored that they would care that much to give to me from their wonderful talents especially being JUST really good friends.

I would imagine that your GF would appreciate such a special poem that comes from your heart.

[Onward2wards]

The word "squee!" comes to mind. That is sweet and heartfelt. ♥

[Blades]

Thanks everybody. I gave the poem to Mandy tonight and she loved it. She said it was the cutest thing anybody had ever wrote for her and she kissed me. I am working on some other poems for her too and she wants me to write her a song. I’ve been trying to get over writer’s block so I can quit this stupid job I have now and become a songwriter again but it’s been very difficult since losing Rachel. She was my inspiration after losing Jessica and when she passed away it was like the well had dried up. Now I’m with Mandy I feel like I can write again and she wants me to write as much as I can because she thinks I’m very talented.

I might go back to my novel now and try to complete it so I can accomplish my dream of becoming a horror writer like Stephen King. I would be happy to share excerpts from it with the members on here but I would prefer not to post them publicly in case other writers are reading this forum and steal my ideas. I've already had tons of ideas stolen from me by a bunch of low life criminals when I was working in the country music industry and I am not going to allow it to happen again.

Here is an excerpt from another poem

In a subtle but interesting way
The mystifying things you say
Are casting a spell over me

[beauflow]

I think that's sweet! , I am glad she love your poem!

My bf thinks he is a cheese factory but the things he says are very reassuring for me... So don't doubt your writing,

[Blades]

Thanks beauflow. I won't doubt my writing.

[Brianna84]

I just want to add: sometimes corny is cute. Actually, usually it is. Wish my bf could write poetry...