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#1
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I don't know why, but I did.
I met this man online months ago. We started chatting and then he asked me for a picture. I quickly sent him a picture of my so-so friend. I knew it was wrong, but I had no self-esteem at the time. Then, we started talking on the phone every day and I kept sending him more pictures of this friend. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I love him; I really do. We both say we love each other, but we have never met. I always think to myself; why did I do this? what have I gotten myself into? He's tried to break contact with me a few times, but I couldn't stand to lose him. We are still going strong, but he is caught in my lie. He wants to meet and I keep putting it off. I want to tell him that the pictures aren't really me, but I'm scared he will hunt me down or hunt her down. I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose him, yet I have to and that's why I keep putting it off. What should I do? Is there anyway I could slowly break it off without even telling him that I lied? |
#2
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((((((( liarliar ))))))))))) I believe honesty is the best option in your situation, be sure to explain why you did what you did maybe he will understanding.
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#3
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Yeah, I think honesty is the best way to go too.
I have been in a similar situation myself in the past and I'll tell ya, I never did meet with him and I regret it. You could even email him this info, be honest, be yourself and just tell him you were scared at the time and got caught up in a lie. Maybe he would want you to send him a new pic of you and then go on from there. If you want to end it, then be honest with him about that as well. It will work out Im sure...just give it time. ![]() Good Luck to you.
__________________
Dance as though no one is watching you.... Love as if you have never been hurt before, Sing as though no one can hear you.... Live as though heaven's on Earth! |
#4
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You should send him a picture of you.
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#5
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Boy, I would just get out of the whole thing. You're lying. Maybe he's lying. Too much uncertainty. Too creepy for me. I would just say that your life is moving in a different direction & you need to focus on your career or something & an on-line or developing or committed or whatever (?) words you would use for your relationship just doesn't fit into your life right now. I hope you didn't give him any identifying info.--where you live, etc. (cringing)--Suzy
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#6
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I would try and end it asap. The fact that you didn't feel comfortable enough with him in the first place to send a picture of yourself makes me feel he is not the guy for you. The longer you put off ending it the harder it's going to be for both of you. The sooner you end it the sooner you can move on to meet someone who is right for you.
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#7
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Do like I did last night. Tell him the truth. You didnt have the self esteem to send him one of you, so you sent one of your friend. If he loves you enough he will forgive you. If not, it wasnt meant to be.
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#8
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It's a shame that you couldn't just be honest with this person when you first met him by explaining to him that you don't have very high self-esteem in the first place. Yes of course you should come clean with him and hope for the best, but you also have to understand that if you want to be in a meaningful relationship with somebody then you've got to be honest with them about the way that you feel about things, otherwise you'll just be a wolf in sheep's clothing. If I were you I'd be scared and reluctant to come clean with him too because there is a chance he may not be so understanding. If he isn't, then I empathize with you in losing someone you love, but at the same time I don't think you'd really want to be with somebody who doesn't fully understand the depths of your character. I'd hope that your standards are higher than that.
I agree with the first few posts that advised you to be honest and come clean with this person, but I think its most important for you to come clean with him for your sake and not his. By keeping the lie alive you're simply denying the fact that you have (what seems to be) serious self-esteem issues, thereby running from them when what you should be doing is confronting them head-on. It's scary sometimes to talk about issues like this with people, but I think you'd be really surprised at how common low self-esteem really is. A lot of people have experienced it or are experiencing it right now, and if there's anything that can take the edge off of rough times it definitely includes not having to experience those rough times alone. |
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