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Old Jan 14, 2005, 12:27 PM
stupidme stupidme is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2004
Posts: 20
Hi guys,
Just to say that I want some advice on how not to clam up with my partner when we get intimate and wondering if anybody has any tips??? It's 3 years since my rape and I love my partner dearly and trust him 110%. He's helped me so much so does understand what I'm going through.... yet when we make love I clam up sometimes even just in foreplay but we've NEVER managed to fully make love or enjoy it. If I do get past the foreplay stage, then I usually end up panicking during the big event and need to stop - which of course he understands but it can be sooo frustrating for both of us and akward..... any tips???? please any will do I am desperate!

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  #2  
Old Jan 14, 2005, 01:07 PM
heartbroken heartbroken is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2004
Location: Indiana
Posts: 12
Have you been through any counseling to deal with all of the pain and hurt and emotions that came along when you went through that horrible situation? I've never been in your position, but I want to encourage you to overcome all of this. It will take time I am sure, but it's awesome that your partner is definitely by your side, not pushing you. I don't have any sound advice that will automatically help since we are all different and we all cope differently. I would say to take it slow and try not get frustrated because you have been through such a trauma. It will take time, how much, I don't know, but keep your spirits up and take care of yourself.

Heartbroken
  #3  
Old Jan 14, 2005, 01:09 PM
nothemama8's Avatar
nothemama8 nothemama8 is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2004
Location: PA USA
Posts: 7,878
Need to find you a better name , okay on to your problem.
Have you got a womens victim program there, you need to talk to other women that have gone through the same thing you have, remember no matter how compassionate a man, he can't feel a female emotion
Angie
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