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#1
Jan 12, 2005, 07:18 AM
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People think i'm gay, i don't know if am, i don't want to be. I'm afraid that i may be, and it's affecting my life to a point where i don't even want to socialize with anyone. What do i do? How do I know? If you are, how did you know?
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#2
Jan 12, 2005, 10:06 AM
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Hi Jay.
Whether you are gay or bi or straight or pansexual is something that YOU will decide/know when you allow yourself to experience things. We all have different sex drives and sexuality is a wide field, too wide to be kept under labels. Lol None of us would be here if our makers hadn't had sex. I'm sorry that you worry about other people's perceptions of your sexuality, though, and that it makes you afraid of it, because it's your business and nobody else's. One thing that might help you decide is the kind of image/fantasy that makes you feel good when you're pleasuring yourself. Sexual pleasure is a wonderful gift that nature has bestowed upon us humans. When you realize that, it will probably make it easier for you to come to terms with your wants and needs. Please, try not to punish yourself, though. Please try not to let your godsend sexuality overcome who YOU are. Who you are is not to be determined by who you sleep with. Best wishes. (what's so funny about peace, love and understanding?) |
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#3
Jan 12, 2005, 07:26 PM
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I really wish the creator would have created Adam,Even and Steve. Woman, man, and gay. That would have prevented controversy.
Please know we are all incredible and with talents of all kinds, who we want to sleep with does not have absolutely anything to do with how wonderful every single one of us are. I am straight, but can love and respect everybody whether they are gay, or whatever. PLEASE! That is only one element of the many elements that makes us who we are. Before anything, love yourself and allow yourself to be free of prejudgements. Happiness is found when we learn to love ourselves, regardless of who we are.
__________________
gab |
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#4
Jan 12, 2005, 07:43 PM
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hi jay. im straight, as far as sexual preference anyway. i mean usually... okay fine some chick are hot but anyway...
you shouldnt beat yourself up about it. i know it doesnt seem ideal to be gay, especially with the whole american dream being about family and white picket fences. i know a lot of successful gay people though. there are plenty where i work because we support a diverse workforce. and they are fine with it. we dont have very many closed minded people there because the job (social work) requires us to take everyone's perspective into consideration. one of my son's friends has gay parents.... two men. they adopted these two brothers, they live in a comfortable home, they attend school functions together, etc. you just gotta give yourself permission to be yourself. maybe you will find out that you were confused and really straight, maybe you'll find out that you are gay.... some people will not like it but all that matters is being true to yourself. |
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#5
Jan 12, 2005, 10:10 PM
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I've had quite a few male and femle gay friends. Don't really know why -- I'm hetero.
Those I've met were at a point where they were comfortable with it and OUT. Some of them described earlier times in their lives where it had been hard for them -- usually if they had grown up in a small town, or in a family/neighborhood where religious/cultural beliefs made it "bad/wrong" to be gay. So, hopefully, no matter which way you go -- or even perhaps both ways and bi -- I agree that it probably is a matter of coming to accept yourself. Best wishes -- |
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#6
Jan 13, 2005, 01:01 AM
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Sorry this is included in your insecurity! If you sense you aren't and don't wish to be, then odds are you are not. Often when hormones are in a spurt or changing, you might have such wonderings.... an awkwardness. Please don't withdraw from all socialization... just be who you are at the time, and don't allow anyone to coerce you or tell you who you really are!
Welcome to psychcentral, btw!
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#7
Jan 13, 2005, 04:29 PM
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All we need is love......
All we need is love...... All we need is love, love Love is all we need.... (love from ourselves to ourselves, self acceptance) Take care.
__________________
gab |
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#8
Jan 14, 2005, 02:05 PM
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</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
love from ourselves to ourselves, self acceptance </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> That's the greatest LOVE of all!  (Gloria, you just warmed the coccles of my heart and put a great big smile on my face!)
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Psalm 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. |
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