girlfriend needs space

he started saying that I was a care taker of her and that I was only her room mate, he made does remarks to a mutual friend of hours. I am sure if she confronts him he will deny everything but who do you think she will believe?????

also, she has kissed me but the relationshipp is still not there she said she needs time and space. I am doing everything to give her time and space but I am sure he will deny ever said that and I am wondering who she will believe.

she said she loves me and Although we are not together yet she said today she would go with me where ever I moved in the US. She hasnt spoken to him so its good for now until she confronts him.

What do you think will happen? she still said she loves me and I asked her if she saw me and her together again and she said yes. I guess she is thinking and getting over her emotions for him. But what will happen when its his word against mine?

Opinions???

Need opinion....

My girlfriend started using the ring again and has agreed to commit to me. The bad she said she will stop comunication with ex boyfriend when she is ready. She calls him every now and then when I am not there and has marked in her calendar his birthday.

She said she is 100% mine and wants to be with me but wants space because supposedely, I am drowning her by not giving her space (NOT TRUE) but I agreed.

Question: IS this something I should worry? Will she ever get over him? Do I need to do anything? confront him? Let him know whats happening? let him know we are engaged?

I wonder if everything will be fine if she will be able to move forward with me and forgeet about him. We havent even had intercourse since we are back, she is very loving with me and shows lots of affection to me. But no intercourse, is this a sign she want him?

What should I do????Opinion on all these questions greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

OH the last thing you should do is confront him. He has nothing whatsoever to do with your relationship with your gf. Their relationship is entirely under her control. It sounds very much like she wants to have her cake and eat it too.

You're girlfriend's actions about her ex are very suspicious. I was sitting here thinking, attempting to remember my exs birthdays and the only one I can recall is from nearly 30 years ago. The only reason I remember it is because it is the day after mine and he was born and St. Patrick's Day (named Patrick).

Are you familiar with the old poem If you love something set it free, if it returns to you it is yours, if it does not it never was?

Yes, I am familiar with the term. I asked some people I know and some told me to be careful while the mayority told me her ex is a non going relationship. The fact that he wont leave in the state we are in because he used to leave here and left. He hates it. He now lives at 1500 miles away and wont move back here.

My girlfriend wont move there for several reasons, her daugher goes to school here and does not want to move anywhere else, she made it clear she will stay here if my girlfriend decided to move. Her entire family mother, sister, brother, nieces, nephews live here and she wont leave them. Third, I am here and we both have jobs here.

She left him because he hurt her several times, he is a player, and because she knows she doesnt have a future with him at all.

The mayority of the people told me: give her the space, dont worry abou th emails, or messages and give her the space she wants. She wont go back to the same thing that she left because she got hurt and was lonly to start. People told me to not mention him, and not worry because doing anything is like beating on a dead horse.

His done. It may take sometime for her to realize it but at the end it will come to her senses.

Even if I get taken for a ride, I will go on until either she is with me forever, or she goes with him. I have 2 options leave her or stay with her and see what potential future we have together. Cuttiing everything right now is like quiting and I will always look back at what if..... So, If i get hurt or taken for a ride then I will eventually get over it.

I decided to stay with her and see what our future will be. I know she has been very loving with me and has swored to me she is 100% mine and she loves me. She told me she still has some feelings for her ex but thats normal after 3 years of been togetehr and she will most likely be over him soon.

Let s see.

Comments??????

Good for you, I'm glad you came to a decision.

based on my last desicion , am I doing the right things? right approach? annyone????

Only you know what's best for you, and if you think this is the right thing then it is. My advice is that now that you've decided to stick it out, you have to leave the past in the past. Trust her to deal with her issues and not let them eat you up. There is a fine line between compromise and sacrifice.

the reason I asked for advice is for people who have tons of more experience then I to tell me what they think I should do. I have agreed to let everything in the past and move forward. I am not bringing stuff from the past into our relationship she has been more caring and loving with me since I have given her all the space I can.

It hurts me internally to know that when we have intercourse I am the only one to get to the finish line and she doesnt. She says she is not in the mood. She has in the past gotten there but for the most part she doesnt and it turns me off because it makes me feel that she doesnt love me.

I understand sometimes the mood varies and we can do it but its the mayority of the time she is not in the mood and she is only 40 years old.She had a daugher dont know if makes a difference. I also last long and not a superman.

Any suggestions????

anyone suggestions? above comment?