Feeling wet when I see a therapist

what I think I've finally figured out is that for me it's my body's response to fear.

eastcoaster, did you discuss it with your T yet? Can you give us an update? I'm so curious as to what she thinks is the reason it happens. I think it's a combination of things as some have said: fear, intimacy, adult reactions, etc.

LydiaB,

Thanks so much for your response. I think I just crave some sort of closeness that I didn't have with my own mom, who is emotionally unavailable and judgmental. I understood the other transference feelings (general love, wanting hugs, allowing the "child" to come out, wanting attention from therapists), but the wetness is confusing. I didn't think that it had to do with sex, but at the same time, from what I understand it is a sexual response to some sort of stimulant. It's like being loved by a mother is some sort of the ultimate pleasure for me, almost better than/replacing sex? I've particularly noticed the wetness during and after sessions when I totally open up and completely be myself, share my deepest, darkest feelings inside of me. It feels very good to be able to do these things because I know that I am not judged and am loved even more by my therapist for showing these sides of me.

Your suggestion about talking to my current therapist about the masturbation images is probably the right thing. My fear, though, is that she'll think that I could feel the same way about her, which I don't. I do want to be close to my current therapist - lots of motherly hugs, but that's it. I don't want her to feel awkward as she hugs me, I'm really sensitive to this. I guess with the previous therapist we shared so much of ourselves emotionally (she didn't reveal things about her own life, inappropriate, etc., but our relationship was emotional, tearful, and challenging) that masturbation would be another way to share a special form of closeness.

Thanks again for your thoughts.