Do you wonder what T's partner is like?

same. I knew about T's marital status from the first session. my feelings towards him are paternal but sometimes I crush too hard so it's not upsetting that he's married. I'm married too. I suspect that makes a difference. i bet I might feel more emotions if I wasn't in a super loving marriage.

My T had gotten married shortly before I started working with him. We have a very open and easy relationship so I know a good bit about her, what she does, where she works, some familial stuff. I have a long term relationship with my T so a lot of it has just come up in the course of therapy.

It doesn't bother me at all honestly. I like knowing about who I'm working with and I'm in a very happy, loving marriage myself so I don't have any desire for a romantic relationship. He makes a good therapist and that's what I need

I do know about my T but only because I saw all before I went to see him. Psychic medium. If I wasn't I would only know his name. Lol

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I think I may have found my T's (ex?)husband on a website. A few hints she made about her Dad's line of work led me to find his organization which, as it turned out, was in an area I was Googling anyways. There was a man on that site with my T's maiden name (her dad) and also one with her current last name. I assume this is/was her husband. She doesn't wear a wedding ring and I get the strong vibe that she's been divorced at least once but I don't know. They have at least one kid together.

I felt a flicker or disillusionment, not for who this guy seemed to be but for the fact that he was still 'in the picture' then I caught myself and realized I was projecting my own Dad Stuff at him and let it go. Ha! It was an informative moment!

I also found myself thinking of some other little moments she showed her some emotion about something and realized the two could be connected, or I could just be projecting.

Overall I just had to check myself and I came to like the idea of who this guy seemed to be. But ultimately, it doesn't really matter to me, in the end.

The one has an older therapist for a husband. Second (or more - not the first at any rate) marriage for either. I have no idea what they sit around doing - feeling at each I suppose.

I'm a woman and have a female T, and still, i'm very curious about her husband and kids.
she never mentioned her family, but i know she's married and has at least one child.
after using all of my googling skills, i found out that her husband is also a T... found a short video of him, and thought that he looks really cute and sensitive.

anyway, snooping after her private life on google made me feel very embarrassed.

sometimes after session, i wonder if her husband noticed how beautiful and sexy she was today and if he still appreciate it...
occasionally i wonder about their sex life, and pretty sure it's great.

since both of them are T, i have this image of them being the perfect couple who can work out any problem and be in love forever.

I have the opposite problem - I know too much about my T.

I know where he grew up, a bit about the different places he has lived, his education, a bit about the crap /abuse etc he experienced in childhood and has had to deal with, what he did during Vietnam. I don't have the trauma of knowing he's married, I have the trauma of knowing he's divorced. And boy is that ever trauma - he's available so it's a heck of a lot easier to fantasize about him. (I even know his ex-wife - we have worked together, in the same sort of way that T and I have worked together, years ago before he was my T that is - we have all been service providers to the same client - can't really explain more thoroughly). His office is in his home so I know a bit about how he lives. I know about his kids (both adults) and his involvement with his grandchild. At times I wish I didn't know so much about him - and I wish this town weren't so small, I keep expecting to run into him on the street (and I have, from time to time, although only once since this last bout of therapy with him) and so I am always so conscious of my appearance and how I carry myself when I am out and about.

I know my T is married and has kids. I often wonder what it would be like to be a part of their family. I'm sure they aren't as perfect as I think they are...

I know what he's like. What's she's like. Their kids. Not perfect by any means but I'd prefer it to mine....

To those who don't know but are curious: What's the worst thing that could happen if we just asked?

When I asked my T multiple times, each time she would answer with "why do you want to know?"

The worst that could happen would be if she actually answered, then I would be heartbroken and know for sure I have no chance of marrying her, ever, which ruins the fun of my fantasies.

Wouldn't this be a little beneficial for you then? I'm sorry if this is insensitive or incorrect, as I've never had to deal with erotic transference, but wouldn't some reality to the extent of your relationship possibilities be a good thing? You can't marry her, she has a husband or wife, and wouldn't it be better to know that she's being taken care of then to sit with the thought that not only can't your relationship happen but she's also alone? Again, I'm honestly asking not passing judgement.

To be told that it's none of our business and then end up feeling like crap for having violated that boundary. A T I had in the past disclosed absolutely nothing about herself. All I knew was that she was married and had adult kids (hardly a difficult deduction), what part of town she lived in (the affluent part) and where she had a summer place. That's it. There were a few times when I thought she was on the verge of giving something away (for example, I'd mention someone in my field who is prominent and well-known and be speaking in terms of my aspiring to be like them) and this little smile would play about her lips and I'd accuse her of knowing that person (all the while thinking "oh god, what's she telling him/her about me?" - nothing of course, she was entirely professional and would never break confidentiality) but she never admitted or denied anything.

My current T does not work that way and is quite prepared to reveal info about himself - to the point where I have been a bit taken aback with how open he has been. But then I realize that I can be fairly open with my own clients. Maybe it's just a style thing??

All I know is, one time my therapist inadvertently mentioned having sex with her husband, like, "do you think my husband would want to have sex with me if (fill in the blank)...?" And I got so grossed out that I changed the subject. I think because she feels like a mom to me lol.

My ex T is married and has kids. I know their names, but that's all. I looked her up online, found one picture, she seems nice. I actually spoke to her on the phone once, when my T was sick and she answered. She sounded very nice and welcoming, I almost poored my heart out to her

I'm not jealous of her, I don't have romantic feelings for my ex T. I'm actually happy for him that he has a nice wife and lovely kids, I wish him all the best.

Ugh! I'd be absolutely mortified if my T said anything like that to me. No way do I want to talk about her sex life or even think about it.

OMG I know! I was sooo uncomfortable! Ick!