[AnxiousandAlive124]

I just have to express here how much I care about my therapist. Some of it is hard to express in words.
On top of that, I'd really like to tell her at some point since I trust her and she's been my T for 3.5 years. I don't think it will exactly freak her out, she has shown me pretty stable care during my 3.5 years.
Anyway, I have deep feelings for her (I'm a bisexual female). I don't dream about sex with her or anything too intense, but in reality I have a crush.
I have thought about kissing her, taking her to bed, performing oral on her, and being intensely close physically and emotionally. In therapy we mostly get the emotional part to a degree. I just wish I could expose how much she means to me and have her accept everything, even though she probably doesn't feel the same way. I get that I am a very attractive girl a lot, but I wish she would see that. It's funny how you can get attention from other girls and still think about her at least from time to time in the romantic sense. Just wanted to post, any thoughts or feelings/ advice would be appreciated. I just want to get my feelings out in the open even if it's not with her directly

Hello Anxious. Transference takes different forms and shapes. When i was younger i often ran into people that expressed friendships by sleeping with their friends. Not everyone is up to that sort of expression. There is a professional boundary there that cannot be ignored. If you tell her how you feel you risk losing her as your T and then you would be devastated. I am glad you could express how you feel here. Everyone at some point in their life have fantasized about another who does not feel the same way. Often we tend to fantasize about what we cannot have. Keeping a journal is helpful. Then going back to read later helps us see where we were emotionally and what was going on to make us feel the way we did. I just recently got divorced. I can say this, think before you get involved with someone, and is it really worth it. I say NO, it is not worth the effort of emotionally exhausting ones self if you have a mental illness. First you have to get better yourself before you can try to give to someone else, otherwise it leaves you worse off then you were before. Take this time being single as a time to sort out your feelings, what you want in life, where you want to go. Then work at those goals. I wish you all the best. Blessings and tc

[nicoleflynn]

An ethical therapist doesn't abandon you /any client, if they express feelings for a t. We should feel safe to express ALL of our feelings.

[Ididitmyway]

Originally Posted by mrsassy

Hello Anxious. Transference takes different forms and shapes. When i was younger i often ran into people that expressed friendships by sleeping with their friends. Not everyone is up to that sort of expression. There is a professional boundary there that cannot be ignored. If you tell her how you feel you risk losing her as your T and then you would be devastated. I am glad you could express how you feel here. Everyone at some point in their life have fantasized about another who does not feel the same way. Often we tend to fantasize about what we cannot have. Keeping a journal is helpful. Then going back to read later helps us see where we were emotionally and what was going on to make us feel the way we did. I just recently got divorced. I can say this, think before you get involved with someone, and is it really worth it. I say NO, it is not worth the effort of emotionally exhausting ones self if you have a mental illness. First you have to get better yourself before you can try to give to someone else, otherwise it leaves you worse off then you were before. Take this time being single as a time to sort out your feelings, what you want in life, where you want to go. Then work at those goals. I wish you all the best. Blessings and tc

I don't know how you got from the OP's post that she wants to start a relationship with her T. She is only talking about wanting to tell her T how she feels about her and she wants to express herself fully.

[Ididitmyway]

AnxiousAndAlive, you can say whatever you want to say in therapy. Your T should be able to handle everything you say professionally and I hope she does.