[Rhapsody]

How do YOU deal with life when you and your spouse of 21 years are no longer on the same page as far as God and Spiritual Beliefs/Faith go?

- even though you both are Christians and started the marriage as such (together in God).

[bebop]

this was kind of the topic at our church tonight. what was said was that we should stay together and keep going to church and maybe the spouse would come back around basically. not sure how I feel about it really. there is a verse in the bible about being unequally yolked.

[Direction]

If you are both stil open to prayer...pray together as a couple each night...pray for each other...unfortunately it is not something that can be forced...

[EJ711]

Rhapsody,

My husband and I have not been able to find a church home since moving to rural Kansas going on five years ago.

When we lived in Orlando, FL, we found a wonderful church, with an amazing preacher. I felt like every week we went to church, it was like going in for a wheel alignment. During this period we didn't pull in opposite directions as much.

Just keep praying, and asking God for strength, and maybe a special sign from Him that you are right where He wants you.

Hugs,

EJ

[Rhapsody]

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bebop said:
there is a verse in the bible about being unequally yolked.

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Yeah...... I know that verse, but I take it more as before marriage - not after a Christian marriage has taken place and then once back slides or doubts God for a period in life.

[Rhapsody]

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Direction said:
If you are both stil open to prayer...pray together as a couple each night...pray for each other.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Sad to say, but PRAYER left us as a couple many years ago - hubby is not so comfortable with it..... I still pray with in myself.

[Rhapsody]

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EJ711 said:
Just keep praying, and asking God for strength, and maybe a special sign from Him that you are right where He wants you.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I do believe I am right where God wants/needs me - for while my husband and I may have grown apart (emotionally & spiritually) and hurt each other at times.... we have not done any thing that God would consider reason enough to divorce or seperate from each other.

I am just so lost still being so connected to God and then having my once Christian husband - doubting God now.

... How does a spouse deal with this when it happens?

[sunrise]

My husband of 20 years has become increasingly hostile toward anything religious. I feel it is impossible to even mention God in the house or anything at all spiritual, even in an intellectual discussion. He gets all angry and is very insulting and belittling to anyone in range. It's not like I'm even that religious, but this atmosphere of religious intolerance in our home is one piece of the puzzle of why I am moving forward with divorce. One of my children will be leaving home soon and she confided to me that she looked forward to being able to explore religion once she was out of the house.

[Rhapsody]

<font color="purple"> ((((((( HUGS ))))))) ~ ~ ~ ~ ((((((( HUGS ))))))) </font>

I am sorry that your life and marriage has had to come to such a point, may God ensure your soul with PeAcE during this time of change.

While my husband is pulling away from God - I am glad to report that he does not mind that I still have my Faith - he just does not want me to push it onto him while he is doubting and probably searching in a round about way.

[Direction]

Anything in particular that shook his faith?

I know mine has been shaken and I was holding on to a large limb of an oak tree before it fell of the trunk...sometimes we hang on to branches...sometimes we hang on to the trunk itself...

maybe just love him. I think sometimes people get afraid of others who question their faith... but maybe be afraid of this part of him... talk openly if he likes to or just accept him if you can. As someone who is going through that very thing.. I'm suprised at how many people who were close to me before.. now feel like they can't relate. Perhaps it has changed me, but maybe that new part of me is still likeable.

[Rhapsody]

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Direction said:
Anything in particular that shook his faith?

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Many things have.......................... He feels let down - left by God.

[Rhapsody]

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esthersvirtue said:
maybe just love him.

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I am..................... it is just hard for his lack of Faith right now has changed him and how he goes about life and with life events - his actions while not terribly bad are indifferent to mine and what God expects of us.

... living with that is the hardest part, for we no longer see eye to eye on things - that which effects us, our marriage, our childern and us the people in this together.

[bebop]

rhap I can tell you what my hubby did when he was going to church and I wasn't. he prayed for me all the time. I have been back in church now for a year. now we are there together. pray pray pray

[Direction]

I would agree with bebop...what ever he feels let down by...pray that he may see all that God is...pray that God would soften his heart again...pray that God would take away those feelings he has...

Could you add me in there somewhere too?

[TYMBERWOLV]

Rhap,

I know that this is a hard time in your life and that u feel so compasionate about your faith. As most of the members here have said "pray" that God will bring him back to you and to God himself.

We seem to fall from Grace cos we do back slide from God and Godly ways yet God is a forgiving God. This is yet another trial that u and hubby are going thru at this time. Possibly hubby still has faith but organized religion is out of the question .. This seems to be the mantra lately amongst people.

Suggestion is keep with your faith never let that down cos God is Gracious God and will give your heart desire if you believe in him. I scream at my mountains everyday calling my wife back to me (seperated ) and calling her back to the Lord

I declare Blessing on you and ur family Rhap that God will bring you wisdom and prosperity and strength

I declare Blessings over Direction that God brings in Strength , wisdom and prosperity

I declare blessings of Grace to my dear friends here because as sinners we dont deserve Grace but our Lord is a forgiving God



Dave

[Gracey]

I've been where you are Rhap. . .and the only thing I can tell you is what someone wisely told me all those years ago.

Men are unique creatures to begin with. Don't ever try to measure him. . .lol. . .but you probably already know that anyway. The ONLY thing that you can do is continue to grow in your own development and don't worry about being "unequally yoked" b/c if he is a Christian (and you said he is) then are you ARE equally yoked. Unfortunately, it's just your turn to carry the heavier end of the yoke. It sucks for you, I know.

Consider marriage like any other investment, you know? you guys have paid into it over the years; you'll continue to do so for many more years. So. . .sometimes you're able to pay more into it, sometimes he is. When one of you can't, that's why the *interest* is there, you know? You get to *borrow* on that when you need to.

I know this isn't really helpful sometimes when you are feeling like you're the only one doing the right thing.

If you ever want to chat, PM me. DH and I went through something VERY similar in the last four years. We made it through though. . .I'm not an expert by any means, but I've walked this road.

[Rhapsody]

Thanks to every one for your help and advice........ please keep us in your prayers for it is hard at times for hubby feels so let down and forgotten by God that is he is now DOUBTING the mere existence of a higher power at all - this is hard on me both emotionally & spiritually.