[EJ711]

Thank you to everyone who has prayed for my cousin Anne before. She has been in the hospital fighting for her life this week. I believe I will be hearing from her daughter any time now, with news that she has died. They are in New York, and I am in Kansas, so I am limited to communicating by phone.

My cousin Anne fell and broke her hip last Saturday. She also has significant heart and lung issues. Because of the broken hip, Anne was placed on the orthopedics wing. What is perplexing me is that my second cousin, Cindy, told me the other night that her mother was in so much pain, she was wailing.

They had not been able to operate yet, b/c Anne was in congestive heart failure.

I understand that Anne's heart and lung issues limited what she could be given for pain, but to have a patient crying out and waililng in pain sounds barbaric to me.

Anne suffered a severe stroke in the middle of the night on Thursday. The medical staff were unaware that this occurred, and her daughter unfortunately is the one who found her unresponsive the next morning, when she came to visit.

It sounds like my cousin might have received better care in a non-orthopedic setting. Does anyone else have any experience with a situation like this?

I thought pain care was more advanced than this.

I have many wonderful memories of laughing with my cousin on the phone over everyday life events to hold in my heart.

EJ

[SeptemberMorn]

EJ, your cousin is in a hospital, right? It seemes to me that the problem lies with the staff and not the fact that it's an orthopedic wing. It's not right that they should let your cousin be in so much pain. Don't they make night rounds to see if everything is okay or if anyone needs anything?

This just isn't right to me. Not at all! Ask your second cousin to have a talk with the doctor to find out what he thinks and where he's coming from, then take it from there as to how far up the ladder you go or your second cousin goes.

This is terrible!

[EJ711]

September Morn,

Thank you for your supportive post, especially at this time.

My second cousin is very good at advocating for her Mom, so I don't know why this has happened this way.

I had been consoling myself when I knew my first cousin, Anne, had been taken to the hospital, that she would be receiving good care.

I'm feeling like my cousin has already passed away, but can't get ahold of my second cousin to find out.

Thank you for your support ~

EJ

[bebop]

((((EJ))))) will be keeping you and your family in my prayers hon.

[SeptemberMorn]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{EJ}}}}}}}}}}}}}} Keeping you and your family in my prayers.

[eskielover]

(((((((((EJ))))))))))))),

I find hospitals to be so much less than we expect from them. It is sad & I know I felt like I was fighting the system when my Mother was dying 4 years ago. Where they choose to put a patient doesn't make any sense.....but it seems they base in on the current problem.....not the main problem that the person has.

First off if someone is having heart failure, they should be in ICU on a heart monitor & round the clock monitoring....not the orthopedic wing what doesn't have the capability of that type of monitoring. Bad choices on the hospitals part.

The sad part is when we end up advocating for our parent, then we become the bad person, the person who is being pushy & just a nuisance to how things work. Don't ask questions, don't rock the boat.....that is all hospitals know.

The issue with the pain med, I think you might have hit on it however....in the middle of heart failure & narcotic pain meds that slow down the heart even more could be considered the combination to kill the person, so they choose to leave the pain rather than give a medication that might mean a law suit by some families.

I hold a lot of anger at the way my Mother was treated everytime she was in the hospital dealing with her cancer........I could write pages on how bad it was & how cruel they were including the arrogans jerk of a doctor that my mother thought the world of (& she shouldn't have as he was a looser) Sadly, I can draw a correlation from what happened directly to the way the Dr & hospital handled my Mother. When I requested that they make sure I be there when they talked to my Mom, they ignored all my requests....because my Mother didn't insist on it. She thought they would just do it because it was the right thing to do.....they don't give a dang......just do their job & ignore what is good for the patient. Then the BS about how the social workers write down all the right words in their notes....yea, they put things down in writing & then never follow through on anything.....so nothing right happens either........oh yes......a very sore subject with me.....& we are trapped with their arrogant incompetence.

Sadly, there aren't any options that are better & most other countries are worse than ours......how scarry.

I think how my Mother was treated & I was there to look out for her.....how am I going to be treated when all alone???? It's scarry to even think about.

I wish I had positive things to say about our hospital system....but my experiences aren't any better than what your family is going through.

My heart goes out to your frustration & anger.....it is definitely well founded however....just don't know how to change such a huge mis-manages system.

Debbie

[Zen888]

((((((((((EJ)))))))))))))))))

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family!

Zen888

[sabby]

(((((((((((( EJ & Anne & Family ))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry to hear of the pain and suffering your cousin is going through and yours as well waiting for information.

It's so unfortunate that hospitals and their staff seem to be so uncaring or incompetent at times. I feel your pain in this

Warm thoughts and prayers going out to you and your cousin and family.


sabby

[SweetSunshine]

So Sorry for what you and your family are going thru Jane. Please know I am sending you all my thoughts and prayers.

[EJ711]

Thank you everyone who has written to me and prayered for my family and me through this experience.

My beloved Cousin Anne went home peacefully early Wednesday morning, with her daughter and grandaughter by her side. They finally got her on a morphine drip, and she was fine after that.

I'm very glad at age 76 she is home, and I won't have to worry about her suffering. We have had a lot of happy times together, so I've been quite sad this week.

I've been down with the flu, and feelings of sorrow and loss are sweeping over me.

Thank you everyone for your support.

EJ

[(JD)]

It's so easy to become ill when we are sad, stressed, our tolerances are down, even if we are feeling well prior to any event.

Be gentle with yourself. I know you wanted to be there...you're just that way.

[Christina86]

(((((((((((((((EJ & Anne & family)))))))))))))))))))))

[EJ711]

Christina,

You hit the nail on the head. I wanted to be there. If I had been able to be there, it's not far from where I grew up, and the medical care there is supposed to be the second best in the U.S. I could have advised my cousin on the importance of morphine, when it comes to broken bones. I would have had her moved over to an appropriate floor lickety split. However, now my much beloved cousin Anne is home, none of the pain will ever come to her mind again.

I know my sadness is making it harder for me to bounce back. I just loved her a lot. We were more like sisters than cousins. Loving her as much as I did and do, is worth every sad feeling I have to suffer now that she is gone.

Thank you, Christina, for always being such a sensitive soul to me and so many others here.

I hope you had a terrific retreat!

EJ