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So now, I won't think.

That would have killed me a few years ago.
A bit late though my ex psychologist told me about people like you.

Costello, I think the concern here isn't necessarily trying to insult necessarily. But, this is a very difficult and sensitive issue. It's not an "on purpose" or "lack of thinking" issue.

The issue is in wording things. You can't argue this away. It would be like someone trying to convince you that the sky is purple with yellow polka dots. The help that is needed is not arguing or telling people that what they are experiencing is invalid or wrong. The point is to help people toward healing, which is a long road, and that healing may include the fact that this belief is a forever thing, but perhaps not always one that paralyzes one from living.

Read this article:
http://www.slate.com/articles/health...sus_jesus.html

I don't at all share Kureha's ideas about an organized enemy. While I cannot be 100 % sure, I think he has paranoia and misinterprets things and puts them together wrong. But by no means that is childish. I know someone in his 50s who has delusions so no it's not an age thing or something you can control. Why would you willingly create something that scares the heck out of you? I have tried to "reason" with my paranoid friend but it doesn't matter what I say. He just doesn't trust my take on things.

I think we should be able to differ without disrespect. I don't share Kureha's view but he has not given me a reason to disrespect him as a person.

It just amazes me how people react to this. Gang stalking is real. Mind control is real. It's not a matter of opinion. It's fact.

Real or not real isn't really the issue here, though. That's not the point of this forum, I think. What's important is that someone feels unsafe and what they believe is making them unsafe isn't a lie or a joke or a bid for attention. It's something that is believed 100%.

Working towards wellness, not judgment.

as a target individual coming to this board. i not only know gang stalking to be real but believe in kurehas paranoia. i am not kureha but i have 2 things for kureha = i have empathy and information.

ive been a TI for many years now and take it militantly serious. if that makes sense.

i wake up. i am briefed every morning. and i make my way into battle.

i am briefed by the news.

i fight i fight i fight. everyday.

Gang Stalker or disinformation agent - usually when people don't believe you - they don't mock you.

Newtus - they've been in my house - so be careful.

Jimi - it's her not him

yes



also
i suspect for myself that too.
i know theyve been around mine. and i do know they are hitched outside in a cabin watching me. 24/7.

Oops.. sorry getting your gender wrong. I kind of halted before I wrote "he" and thought I actually don't know but somehow I decided you were a him afterall. Should have listened to my gut feeling there! Ack.

Jimi - It's hard to tell with just a username

Newtus - No where is safe from them - they are constantly around.

I just hope my nurse doesn't find out - I started going out with my knife again.

I think you should leave the knife at home, Kureha. Or talk to your nurse about it.

It's just I don't feel safe and they will have a weapon.
It's not to use - just to pull out if I have to, I told the nurse I was thinking about it last time.

I know you don't feel safe.

Just tell your nurse, okay?

I see her with the Dr on the 7th - if she knows though - then she'll know I'm more anxious - then she won't believe me when I tell her I don't need meds.

Maybe being honest is best in this case.

I agree to be honest with your doctor. The only way someone can help you is if they get the whole truth. I know that's hard.

It can be a bad idea to walk around with a weapon. Be careful and stay safe.

Can you accept that sometimes I make mistakes?

Yeah maybe, I've been really anxious the last few days - I don't if that is because they have been in here.

I don't know if I should call the nurse - I don't want to look like I'm attention seeking though - so I might just wait until my appointment.

I'm not sure about telling them about the knife - they aren't really cool about it - if I bring it there with me.

You may note that I did not use the word "childish". But, people in their fifties or even later can act and think in non-mature ways. Heck, I do it; I should know!

I can understand that.

I imagine they aren't cool with it. I agree with them. I understand you're afraid, but lots and lots of smart decent people have told you that carrying a knife with you can make you less safe in many ways. You could be hurt by it. You could accidently hurt an innocent person and end up with criminal charges and the guilt of knowing you hurt someone who meant you no harm. And just the fact that you're carrying it may make people see you as 'dangerous' - which can have a whole bunch of unpleasant consequences.

And frankly in the long run carrying a weapon doesn't make people even feel safer. The weapon itself becomes one more constant reminder of the danger. That's how I see it anyway.

I think I'm going to be weak and call - if I still feel the same.
It's weird calling then, didn't think she would be there.

The knife, I'll not be out much over Christmas, last time I stopped for my ex psychologist, she always said I would pull it out on the wrong person as well.

I don't want to use it, I'm not having those thoughts this time.
I just want them to back up.

It just helps me feel safer, like less vulnerable.

I often carry a knife and this is what I've noticed. I have become dependent on one strategy of self defense. I disconnect all the other methods and in the back of my mind I think if there is an attack I can always stab them. Once when I didn't have it, and decided to walk though an area in the dark where I didn't expect meeting anyone at all I came across a runner with a night light. I was terrified.

And mostly because I became dependent on my knife strategy and this time I didn't have my knife. Now this person was just an innocent exercise freak that basically ran past me. Before I started carrying I had many more ideas how to defend myself, run, hide... you know. But because of this habit I felt totally vulnerable without my knife and couldn't even come up with a simple thing like hiding!!

i saw this man openly have his knife on his belt.

i started carrying a knife every once and awhile. not all the time though.

I never used to have anything, not even my phone sometimes.
I should have been at least raped twice - but they say being a gamer makes you more aware - so I avoided that.

In England - its nothing - because this -

"carry a knife in public without good reason - unless it’s a knife with a folding blade 3 inches long (7.62 cm) or less, eg a Swiss Army knife"

This doesn't help - even though it says that it's ok to.

But being a TI - there is no way to hide - I just have to hope they will back up.
They have all this advanced technology - I have a knife