Roll Call 27

I never mentioned this before, but my family also calls me bean and beanie, but most of them do not know I have schizoaffective. I always thought it was a cute nickname, idk why they called me it though.

That's way cool...thanks!

I don't know about that ....I know there is the hearing voices network but they don't focus on hearing more voices so much as normalizing hearing voices...they even give you coping strategies etc.

i slept 15 hours. yesterday was bad. lots of paranoia. T checked in with me a lot thru text. and reminding me when to take PRNs. he texted this morning and things are still bad. he says my shot is wearing out. he calld pdoc and pdoc is gonna try to write an order for the shot today. i hope insurance lets me get it early. i work today 2 to 8.

how is everyone this fathers day?

im having a some paranoia and anxiety but im hoping my morning meds will clear that up soon. at least the paranoia. i gave my dad some gifts and a card.

my dads dead so fathers day is hard for me.

im worried that CVS wont have my shot in stock and will have to order it. so i might not get it today. and its earlier than a month by 5 days. they usually never have it in stock. idk im just kind of freaking out about a lot of things. there is so much going on in my mind. i feel like the voices are gonna come back. T told me to take an invega pill and a seroquel so i did. im hoping it calms me down some.

im sorry junkdna. didnt mean to put you in a bad position...

Told my stepdad happy Father's Day. Didn't really get my mom anything for Mother's Day so I didn't buy anything for my stepdad.

its ok. its not ur fault

I'm okay. My dad is dead and my son's dad left years ago, so I don't think much about father's day.

Do you have to get it from cvs? A lot of hospitals have internal pharmacies that pretty much stock everything. I was always dealing with the grocery and cvs not having meds but pdoc suggested I just used the hospital pharmacy which was literally in the building where I worked and I never had an issue again.

So about a month ago I had posted on Facebook some jams I got from Michigan from a place called american spoon. My dad was like I hope one of those is for Father's Day. I didn't want to blow the surprise by asking which one so I got him all three something called winter compote which is a big chunky pear spread with spices, tart cherry and rhubarb/strawberry. I sent it early because I didn't want to forget. It turns out the cherry was the one he wanted and he decided to save it for Father's Day. Apparently the pear is already gone though which yeah it was really excellent. Anyway I forgot it even was Father's Day until you reminded me because that was all taken care of already.

Eh, I no longer speak to my father so today is just another day to me.

T just texted me and said that they will fill the shot today. so i can get it today before i go to work. i called CVS and they said it would be ready at 12:30. so yay. i dont know about the hospital. i live in a very rural area in western north carolina. its mostly horse farms around here. i live on a 100+ acre horse farm in an apartment. the hospital thats the closest is pretty small. so i dont know if it has an internal pharmacy

My sister is stealing my chargers and it's pissing me off >

Im so sleepy today like all my energy has been zapped but I did doodle around with that image from before that I posted and am creating a story board for it.im not so good with using proper punctuation but have been practicing with it for the comics so they are more professional.here is the intro to the storyboard I am working more on it as I go now.if you click on it a second time it takes you to another window where you can magnify it you might want to do that because it probably is going to show up smaller its a big picture.kairai teishu means puppet master in japanese by the way.

This is so awesome...I love it!

thank you! I need to work on writing out the story board for the next few chapters then I can put the artwork to it and it might take a few days but YAY! it gives me something fun to do!! I love writing stories and I love art looks like I found my calling making manga will let me put both of my loves to use maybe I can actually do this for a living someday?but for now its a awesome way to pass time and occupy my mind so my mind wont wander around and start creating new delusions lol.

Most if them do so if you have trouble getting meds I would call to see if they have it in stock.

I have already started writing out the first chapter I am going to introduce new characters in the first few chapters.a love interest a old grumpy yet funny man a arrogant young man who will become Hiroshies closest ally and a small child who is a lot like Hiroshi and a camp of survivors from some of the villages that have been taken over by Ghanghasu and his henchmen.

I am having such massive sharp pains in both of my sides right now owowowow
I think my umm..*time* is coming on soon lol.

im gonna go lay down for a while

Today my kids honor me on Father's Day because I've been both mother and father to them. I'm going to brunch with my daughters and dinner with my son. I will enjoy their company and the good food but I still feel depressed.

thats what i did on mothers day. honoured my dad because hes been like a mother and father to me.