Roll Call 53

thanks guys now i want taco bell again

That's what I'm doing come May. I'll be getting on a bus at 5.50am to get me into Dublin before 9am. Think it's about 3 hours, then getting a 45 minute tram to the centre where I'm doing the course. Same then after to get home. Think it's about 35 hours a week travelling. I'll be doing that until September and then continuing until the following May to get my batchelors degree. I have no choice, I can't afford to live in Dublin. I am lucky though, with disability benefit here you get free travel so it'll cost me nothing to use the busses and trams.

"The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people." - Randy Pausch.

You're not "the other people".

Haha, go for it! Treat Yo Self!

haha i treated myself already to two burritos two days ago. thats 600-800 calories just those burritos alone. minus everything else i eat. i have to watch what i eat on my meds. im in the middle of diabetes testing right now.

but yea idk about the disability thing but i live out in the country so theres no buses here or any public transportation. barely anyone can find their way here to my house. all the time. so id have to drive.

if anyone pops up with any experience with college life or advice on living alone for college give me a holler.

i think i found out i can take some core classes online but not all but by the time i get to this school ill be done with most if not all of them

i appreciate you guys talking to me. thank you so much

Never go to an Elvis themed karaoke bar alone.

hahaha ok

Over here we have societies in College and Uni. They're like clubs that you can join and vary quite a bit depending on what you want to do. For example you'd have guitar soc, networking (IT) soc, banter soc (just for the bants), religious societies, kayaking soc, etc etc. I'm not sure how it works over there but I'd say they'd have something similar. Anyway, my advice is join as many as you can to fill your spare time. It's a great way to meet people and you're all doing something you mutually enjoy so you'd have stuff to talk about and things to do.

Also, this was a biggie for us, suggest and start a private group Facebook page for your course or even just a module. You find yourself chatting to people more online and that seeds through to real life, you can have the banter and you can help each other out with sharing lecture notes, important bits of the course and just keeping everyone on the same level.

yea they have clubs and organizations at this one too. even at my current one but i cant goto my current ones clubs because i also live wayyy more than jusy an hour away from my current colleges campuses.

i learned so far that the town this university is in is a college town. it has two universities there next to each other. like right next to each other. the school i want to goto is known as a hipster school. so i should fit right in. maybe? and then the other school is a womens university but any gender can go.

the town has a big music scene and is akin to Austin TX (for anyone familiar with Austin). its a lot like austin but way smaller scale. ive been to the town and ive been to austin and yes i can confirm that that is true.

the university even has a private facebook page for people to get to know other people.

I'm going to just ask for the money back instead of the coke and opiates.. It kills me because I get looked down on... And I'm a person just like everyone else.. I'm prescribed amphetamine ffs.. My psychiatrist told 3 friends here that have addiction problems to leave.

Today a good guy that just needed help was told by my psychiatrist to "f off", "I don't care in you're homeless go find a place. Not in this f'ing hospital" and didn't ask him if he was suicidal.

I'm not doing well. I'm afriad of the staff because the nurses from when I came here are on shift right now.

They threatened to lock me up again for saying "I might go crazy".

Damn I'm getting more angry. I feel like I'm going to have a breakdown but nothing like yesterday..

I was given 75mg seroquel it didn't work at all

What for? That's a low dose for antipsychotic properties, usually around 100 and lower is just used for sleep, higher doses for mood stabilization and so on

maybe sleep?

newtus when i first moved out on my own i was scared. i was also around your age. well, when i started living on my own. its an adjustment but i love it now. like i said it takes time to adjust to it. but its better to figure it out now than when you are older. i wouldnt get a roommate.. im too used to living on my own now. just me and toby !!!

went to see It Follows. it was strange and creepy. I liked it. we were under a tornado watch but nothing happened. i feel pretty good. i dont feel as sick. i think it's allergies

I'm going to try calmly talking to my doctor tomorrow at my appointment about my weight concerns with my meds, when I went in last month demanding to get off everything and telling them I don't have a disorder it didn't get me anywhere...

I had a very random tornado warning while I was at work today. My phone started making this high pitched squeal which Ive never heard before. Then I read the message and it says "seek shelter immediately!" So the natural Floridian response is to go and look outside.

Glass of wine and an episode of River Monsters on tap

I can't. My sleep schedule by day went from 12 to 10 to 8 to 7.5 to 8. I've never been this confused in my life. I can't talk properly anymore. I forget what I'm saying in EVERY sentence. Even when I dry my mouth. I get this weird side effect where I touch my left hand and it feels like someone else's hand and arm.

I don't think I'm schizophrenic either. It's all lies. There's no proof that I am. Just theirs.

I don't have schizophrenia. It's people that are screwing with me that causes a psychosis. It's a scam.

I don't really know what to believe anymore. It's just that people are so stupid and they win.

I was supposed to be doing better and leave happy but I rebelled against the staff because of delusions. Which makes me want to idk.. I said pretty much this to my psychiatrist where it lead to delusional thinking at the end that I figure it out.

I'm afriad of the staff. This is their fault. They won't listen I don't want to talk to people. I'm sitting on the bench here chain smoking.

I'm not reading over this because I'll never get an answer..

I think I'm going down a dark path.

^ I'm a bit better now after Zyprexa PRN.

Idk if that's the amphetamine of not. So I'm stopping.

Methylphenidate probably won't be given back because "They're all the same".

NO THEY ARE NOT THE SAME!!! 0.o

So ya.. I'm going to ask for a switch back to Concerta 90mg... If they say no.. Then I think that's it for me.. I'll just idk.. I'm so dependent on stimulants but Ritalin is a seriously calming stimulant.

They won't believe me. I don't think they ever will unless I stand up and say... Is everyone just completely insane?

Hey Tweaky, im sorry you're stuck in there for now. I hope you get out soon so we can trade imagininary product licensing again.

Pdoc appointment later today, hoping it goes well

good morning.....seeing T soon then nurse practitioner.

thanks junk!!!
thats good advice.
i need a pet friendly place for my cat too!

gonna see my therapist too this morning.