Roll Call 63...

i texted T and said i would like to borrow that paranoid and suspicious thoughts book again. it helped me a lot before... i want to read it again and do the exercises again. he said ok cool. i am feeling better than before i think the prn has done its job

Failed not taking added sugar on the first day.

My record.. I want to last a month at least.

Off to work for a jerk! Later everyone!

Morning! It's thundering here. Makes me want to sleep but I see T in a little while. My son is going for molds for braces. I'm currently on his **** list for making him get them.

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morning.

please forgive me.
the nights are hard for me.

How are you doing today?

im sick and im stressed out more because my sisters here so im having symptoms. but anyway i am getting another cold or the flu again idk. i feel extra miserable. my body feels worn out even after all this sleep i had overnight.
my throat is itchy and im coughing and have congestion. but anyway im super stressed out and its making everythigg come to the surface.

thank you for caring and asking

I hope you'll feel better soon. Drink plenty of water!

I'm sorry you are feeling ill again, having colds back to back is horrible...

I hope you feel better soon.

i think all my viibryd is expired. what does that mean? is it less effective? maybe i should just stop taking it

Good morning =]

At my moms work to help out because it's therapeutic for me.

My dad is going to pick me up and my sister then we're all going to the city for the weekend before he goes back to Argentina.

He must have so much air miles. I already know that I could go to Argentina for free because he's been flying everywhere every few weeks or months for like 6 years.

I hope you feel better soon!

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Waiting on T. I'm super anxious this morning. I opened my door to let my dog in and all I saw was an empty collar at the end if his run. Thankfully he came barreling in as soon as I stepped outside. My last dog was hit by a car and that sent me into a spiraling depression. I'm so grateful that he didn't run off. If never make it through losing another one. Ativan is on board and I'm feel ma little better.

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Wow talk about typos. Stupid autocorrect only seems to work when it feels like it.

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Omg I am so stressed. **** the Ativan I need something better. Maybe a horse tranquilizer would work lol. It will be good to see T today. I'm feeling bad about the braces and I almost lost my favorite dog. Sshhhh don't tell the other two that I have a favorite.

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I'm really stressed today too. I went back to sleep around 2:30 am and slept until 8 am. That's late for me lately. I can't seem to get organized today. My mod is spitting and everything is going wrong.

(My mod is my vape thing.)

thank you angelique and loial and ofthevalley. i feel aboslutely miserable

Left a message at the clinic, hopefully will hear back next week, what to do with this horrible agitation and anxiety

Do you still have Klonopin? It always helped me.

I do but I don't want to take it if it's not a current prescription, I really need it though. I used to be on it but then management changed and they either don't prescribe it and I'm too afraid to ask to be put back on it and be seen as a drug seeker or something

I know what you mean. It's so frustrating to have relief in sight but be afraid to use it up, or like me not have it at all anymore. It worked like a charm.

Screw vaping I'm buying a pack of smokes

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vaping is hard to stick with but once i came to the realization that its too far to get a pack of cigs was when i stuck on vaping. i can buy liquid and supplies online and have it shipped to my door. i still goto shops though because the liquid lasts me so long. im a bit agoraphobic. nothing extreme though.

Yeah, vaping can be a pain but it's way better than smoking. Cigarettes taste like crap the farther you get from your last one, and they make me feel sick now too. Anyway I have too much lung damage now to smoke again.

a pic of my Ts hand and a big spider from a few yrs ago. my friend took the photo. we wanted to show how big the spider was..my T said it looked like he was shooting the web out of his wrist like spiderman