[justmeandmyhead]

A place to voice/vent psychotic or unsafe thoughts.

[justmeandmyhead]

I feel like the sky is closing in on me. Everything feels wrong cos I can perceive other dimensions again. Maybe the meds just suppressed my abilities and I'm supposed to be this way. Whenever I go outside I can feel the beings watching me absorbing my soul. I can't live like this for the rest of my life

I think this is a good idea, because roll call moves so quickly and sometimes important posts get missed

*Willow*

[justmeandmyhead]

Originally Posted by WeepingWillow23

I think this is a good idea, because roll call moves so quickly and sometimes important posts get missed

*Willow*

Thanks willow, that's the idea. Then people won't feel ignored

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

I feel like the sky is closing in on me. Everything feels wrong cos I can perceive other dimensions again. Maybe the meds just suppressed my abilities and I'm supposed to be this way. Whenever I go outside I can feel the beings watching me absorbing my soul. I can't live like this for the rest of my life

I can relate to feeling watched and it is horrible. I hope your injection kicks in soon, and the relief of a break in your exams means that things improve soon for you Justme

*Willow*

[justmeandmyhead]

Thanks willow

[Atypical_Disaster]

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

I feel like the sky is closing in on me. Everything feels wrong cos I can perceive other dimensions again. Maybe the meds just suppressed my abilities and I'm supposed to be this way. Whenever I go outside I can feel the beings watching me absorbing my soul. I can't live like this for the rest of my life

I can definitely relate to this. It's a horrible feeling to know that you're being watched like that.

[justmeandmyhead]

Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster

I can definitely relate to this. It's a horrible feeling to know that you're being watched like that.

Thanks atypical sorry you can relate

I have to cover all of the mirrors around me because they watch me through those. I don't understand how that works; if it's extra dimensions like you talk about Justme, or something else? I just know that they do. They also watch me through Dog's eyes: I think they monitor his brain waves like they do mine. There's less people obviously watching me in person lately, thought they could just be better at blending in, but they've gotten birds involved now too. I guess it's cheaper. I've seen some of the birds wearing camera contact lenses that look like this:


It freaks me out. I really HATE leaving the house, but also it's hard to love a dog that's spying on me, even though I know that it's not his fault :/

to all those being watched. I wish they'd leave us all alone.

*Willow*

[justmeandmyhead]

Originally Posted by WeepingWillow23

I have to cover all of the mirrors around me because they watch me through those. I don't understand how that works; if it's extra dimensions like you talk about Justme, or something else? I just know that they do. They also watch me through Dog's eyes: I think they monitor his brain waves like they do mine. There's less people obviously watching me in person lately, thought they could just be better at blending in, but they've gotten birds involved now too. I guess it's cheaper. I've seen some of the birds wearing camera contact lenses that look like this:


It freaks me out. I really HATE leaving the house, but also it's hard to love a dog that's spying on me, even though I know that it's not his fault :/

to all those being watched. I wish they'd leave us all alone.

*Willow*

I've covered mirrors before because I thought that spirits were coming out of them. Sorry your going through this willow. For me the extra dimensions is that I can sense other worlds overlapping this one and there are entry points like portals.

[justmeandmyhead]

*trigger* I've started having thoughts about ending my life in the park again. My pdoc asked if I was having them when I saw him and I said no because I wasn't but they're back.

[justmeandmyhead]

Willow I can't imagine how hard it must be to not trust your dog when you want to love him

[Door2015]

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

*trigger* I've started having thoughts about ending my life in the park again. My pdoc asked if I was having them when I saw him and I said no because I wasn't but they're back.

Perhaps you can try to get in touch with him before your next appointment. Is there anything that relieves those feelings, or are they constant?

This thread was a good idea. I'm sure that many will benefit from it.

[Blue_Bird]

I'm sorry justme, I was having suicidal thoughts last night, it's rough. I hope things improve for you

[Angelique67]

I'm frightened I'm never going to get out of my apartment again. I need serious help either moving or clearing this place out and I just don't have the money. I need a place with laundry, a full bath tub, garbage chutes, and no stairs! I'm never going to find that here. I'd have to move back to Chicago.

[justmeandmyhead]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I'm sorry justme, I was having suicidal thoughts last night, it's rough. I hope things improve for you

Thank you blue bird sorry you were having them too

[justmeandmyhead]

Originally Posted by Angelique67

I'm frightened I'm never going to get out of my apartment again. I need serious help either moving or clearing this place out and I just don't have the money. I need a place with laundry, a full bath tub, garbage chutes, and no stairs! I'm never going to find that here. I'd have to move back to Chicago.

Can you ask for support from your local authority? I'm not sure how the system works in America. Maybe a move might be good for you if you could do it, a new start. I always like new starts. Clean and fresh

[justmeandmyhead]

*trigger* I went to the bridge today to see if I could jump off it. The water is a portal underneath it would open like a mouth and swallow me to the other side. Away from the beings. My uncle killed himself the same way on that bridge and people move on that's what I've learned. To better things. Maybe it would stop existing once I left the simulation would have no need to carry on.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

*trigger* I went to the bridge today to see if I could jump off it. The water is a portal underneath it would open like a mouth and swallow me to the other side. Away from the beings. My uncle killed himself the same way on that bridge and people move on that's what I've learned. To better things. Maybe it would stop existing once I left the simulation would have no need to carry on.

You shouldn't think that way. Please don't go back to that bridge. I would miss you so much if you did anything foolish.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

*trigger* I went to the bridge today to see if I could jump off it. The water is a portal underneath it would open like a mouth and swallow me to the other side. Away from the beings. My uncle killed himself the same way on that bridge and people move on that's what I've learned. To better things. Maybe it would stop existing once I left the simulation would have no need to carry on.

Justme if you're thinking like this you need to get help right away either by calling your psychiatrist or going inpatient. The water is not a portal and you could drown if you jump off.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

Can you ask for support from your local authority? I'm not sure how the system works in America. Maybe a move might be good for you if you could do it, a new start. I always like new starts. Clean and fresh

The only thing they could do is maybe take me inpatient again. I don't want to go back in the hospital. It's boring and scary (although the food was OK). No they can't offer me any practical help as far as I know. I don't want to go to a horrible nursing home either. I'm stuck unless there's the money for me to move. I'd love to ride my bicycle again which I could if I lived someplace without stairs. And even maybe take the garbage out.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

*trigger* I went to the bridge today to see if I could jump off it. The water is a portal underneath it would open like a mouth and swallow me to the other side. Away from the beings. My uncle killed himself the same way on that bridge and people move on that's what I've learned. To better things. Maybe it would stop existing once I left the simulation would have no need to carry on.

I agree with sometimesp. If you are feeling this way, you should probably go to the hospital. It isn't a punishment - sorry what I said about it being scary, I just meant the shower at this particular hospital where I was was scary because it was a weird build. I'm sure it's not like that where you are. The hospital itself isn't scary and they did stabilize me. And the food was good. You should go.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by Angelique67

The only thing they could do is maybe take me inpatient again. I don't want to go back in the hospital. It's boring and scary (although the food was OK). No they can't offer me any practical help as far as I know. I don't want to go to a horrible nursing home either. I'm stuck unless there's the money for me to move. I'd love to ride my bicycle again which I could if I lived someplace without stairs. And even maybe take the garbage out.

You're in new york right---have you heard of the NYT neediest cases fund? They may be able to get you money to move out of there..

The Neediest Cases Fund - NYTimes.com

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

You're in new york right---have you heard of the NYT neediest cases fund? They may be able to get you money to move out of there..

The Neediest Cases Fund - NYTimes.com

Thanks sp but I'm not in NY now. I'm in a neighboring state.

[Door2015]

Originally Posted by justmeandmyhead

*trigger* I went to the bridge today to see if I could jump off it. The water is a portal underneath it would open like a mouth and swallow me to the other side. Away from the beings. My uncle killed himself the same way on that bridge and people move on that's what I've learned. To better things. Maybe it would stop existing once I left the simulation would have no need to carry on.

Justme, I'm so sorry that you've felt so badly to start thinking that about this to such an extent. I do hope that you will get help quickly. Please dont go back to the bridge.