Roll Call 73

A song was planted on my spotify playlist made by the people i hear under a famous bands name. I listened to it and it was written to scare me.

I wish Paxil helped more with my anxiety

Hey bud, are you okay?

Hey, everyone, long time no see!

I tried to read all the previous messages on this thread, but that's too tedious (sorry). I hope everyone is doing well and I'm sorry if that's not the cause. I'm kind of meh with my eating disorder as it's screwing up my classes severely, but other than that I'm alright. Still hallucinate here and there, but it's not too terrible when I'm not alone. I've been trying to enjoy things by myself like nature walks, but I always hear footsteps and voices so that sketches me out.

No they have access to my computers now, I'm going to have to wipe them all again. I have 4 computers.

Hope you feel better soon.

Thanks Falcon, I hope your pdoc appointment goes well

Hey, good to see you!

Glad things are ok but sorry there are still some things that aren't going great...

I know it isn't rational for me to hate cameras, but I hate it on my laptop. Put a bandaid over it.

Hearing voices again, telling me to do ****.

Prozac helps me 100% but at a high dose. I seemed to have some superhuman anxiety tolerance over the years. I liked that but it was good while it lasted. I hope Lexapro works the same because my psych said that it works better for anxiety. Benzos don't work for me that well and tolerance builds really fast.

Why do you have 4 computers?

(Granted, I had 4 at one point but just because 3 were broken & I hadn't bothered to throw them out yet! )

Oh, and sorry things aren't going well...

Thanks! I'll try to be on more often and see how everyone is doing. I noticed this thread moves kind of fast now though so that may be difficult. How have you been, Loial?

Hi medicalfox, good to see you

im really hoping that God gives me some sort of change in my life that is going to ease me out of this situation.

its hard to see everyone around me doing something fun and positive while i just have been in the same position for many many years.

I wish my brain would just shut off at times, full of voices and noises.

Why isn't risperdal working

i feel trapped.

Hi medicalfox, good to see you.

Why?

(extra characters)

On a scale of 1-10 how bad of an idea is it for me to call emergency services so I can become stable again inpatient.

Feeling really off-center right now

I suppose it depends on what your treatment plan is like----I've only gone inpatient once....IMO its only useful for changes in medication or suicidal/homicidal thoughts....usually if I feel bad I call the pdoc directly looking for a solution, they can often change your meds over the phone.

nothing has changed over the many years despite the things i HAVE tried. im a late bloomer to everything from music, socializing, college. i catch onto things an average 5 years after most people my age do. i have a list of goals i want to accomplish and i feel trapped by my dad.

macbook for coding in eclipse and keeping those projects together, macbook pro for surfing the web and music, one sony running Ubuntu for practicing bash shell and my Asus Windows 10 for coding with Visual Studio.

Idk if you go to college, but if you do are you or have you majored in Computer Science?

Moving on Friday

Yeah I have a higher certificate (ireland's associates equivalent) in comp sci and I'm starting a level 7 in computer programming to get my degree.