ParRoll Call 97

For those of you who feel like life is zooming by.....something worthwhile to do is volunteer but there are also apps you can use that will donate to charity for some action like running or in my case taking pictures. I really like this app called donate a photo it's by j and j.....what happens is they donate roughly $1 per day per photo you donate...you're typically limited to one a day but they also have surges.....ideally you link to your fb or insta and get your friends into it too although I forgot my password for insta so couldn't link. Anyway it keeps a record of all the causes you've helped and of the pics you've taken so it feels like you're really accomplishing something

I went to the ER last night because really I could keep myself safe from the voices so I was there for 6hours before the ER doc came in and prescribed me olazanpine 5mg then sent me home at like 3am close to it then I took all my night meds and woke up at 11:30am to a knock at my door they were doing fire inspections but I have felt like shiznat the whole day!

They're listening to me. They have listening devices everywhere. In my house in my vehicle in my computer. They might have even tapped into my microphone on my phone.

If they can do that they can see me too. They're constantly watching me are they watching my phone watching me type is nothing safe

If you're watching me type this just let me know stop hiding

My dog does the exact same thing! Runs out into the garden any chance he gets to bark at nothing! I've often wondered why he does something so pointless, but then tonight I realised that I do the exact same thing! I sit in front of my computer/phone screen and 'bark' nonsense at nobody/nothing; pissing into the wind, getting wet feet and yet doing it again and again hoping for a different outcome. They call that the definition of insanity!

TL;DR - Dogs can teach valuable life lessons.

*Willow*

After work and feeling much better. Labour endorphins probably.

I still hear messages in the music a LOT almost 100% of every lyric is giving me a message and I'm somehow able to comprehend it. My focus is unreal. Probably because the stimulant messed up my dopaminergic but more specifically, my serotonergic system.

People are spying on me and controlling my thoughts for sure and I should take my olanzepine but it's not to hurt me or to do me good, it's to use me for something else. Or for someone else.

65-100 years isn't enough. I want, when I die, for my body to be dissolved with every single atom with the energy that moves the atoms around with some extra energy to outlive 100% the multiple time vacuumed sealed liquid and then have a written and digital copy of my DNA for aliens to find me and create me again so when I die, I wake up immediately in case the universe isn't infinite.

But sometimes I think to myself, what's the point of living?

Mostly for loved ones.

But most importantly..

Ain't no one, even God, is gonna tell me how to live!

We could just be in a computer came of life with programmers programming us and playing by inserting certain thoughts into us by typing the literal thoughts and hoping that they win.

But isn't that what we do ourselves? So why care about someone else doing it? Unless their motive was to make us do something bad, they would have done it already.

Unless they are that sadistic as hell and want us to build up our thoughts for a huge disaster.

Then that would be bad. I guess it goes both ways.

The, paradox..

Because if it is a game, even though there is an end, there's a TIME for it to be an end. If time and space (Existence until infinite matter in a black hole causes another reality) is the same thing, then that means that time doesn't end until it ends which means that if there is a time that exists (Which clearly there is), it stops when we die or for the motive to be in place where the "Spies" have to live our life and watch our life in order for that to happen or even stop spying when bored and then click the button that ends our existence because in time, when a game is over, it gets shut off anyways.

The only thing that I believe is time. And we don't know whether or not it stops yet. If we did, we would know the truth to the meaning of life.

I hope that it does stop. I believe it does. Because if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to ignore these thoughts that are destroying my life.

Something that doesn't matter to the world in existence, but it matters to me and a few other people so I'll keep myself sane because that makes sure that those people and myself, are safe from fear.

There is love and there is fear.

The thing is, I don't know whether or not God exists so I chose for it to not exist because I don't have proof. Agnostic atheism and agnosticism is they key to living a life that can end and can be not worried about.

That VMAT2 activation by a certain stimulant that I was taking, is called "The God gene" so apparently when it's activated, people believe in a God that they don't know exists unless there is proof that only they themselves see. And if they think they are God themselves, it's even worse.

Certain drugs activate the God gene (VMAT2) serotonin vesicular monoamine transporter 2.

And that is pretty weird. And kind of confirms everything.

Knowing the truth and unknowing the truth are what I have to figure out properly with antipsychotic medication to keep myself sane.

The answer is 9

Dad talks about were he was when he was in the miltary... Saudi Arabia... I asked him if he met Aladdin... He didnt like my sense of humar.

I think I have a chip in me. I don't know where but I know it's there and I have to find it.

Welp...the kids are off to school
Working today. Trying to decide if I have enough time for a nap but I don't think so. I have to be ready for 9.
What's everyone else up to today? I hope you all have a good day.

Morning.

Having my bottle of water before the coffee

my parents are dead and they got replaced by imposters that the police sent out and paid off
the police killed them and now they are after me too

@Blue_Bird are you OK today?

Did you forget your meds today, Kori?

It feels like autumn this morning. I'll need a jacket here soon. Hope everyone is having a good morning.

It sure does feel like autumn

I was wanting to go swimming one last time this year... It's rainy and cold. lol

73 degrees here

Chilly

72 here right now... suppose to get up to 77 sometime today

65* here, Fahrenheit. :/

60 degrees here.

same here---are you having rain due to the hurricaine?

Not really. Maybe a bit

Its really humid tho.

I agree it feels like autumn this morning also. It is 67 F right now here!