Roll Call CIV (104)

I'm enjoying a little down time......can't really get started until like 11:30 this morning....have to harvest some cells I transfected with the glowing protein. Then I've got to finish up some western blots, you can come over and do my work for me and I'll browse PC......

Haha it’s a plan. I might mess up your experiment though.

I called the school but Im gonna have to call later. I was put on hold for awhile. I might have to be heading out the door soon.

Not even sure if i should call without talking to my admissions advisor first. But hes on vacation this week. Ill shoot him a text tho.

"If you want to stop taking propranolol, you should ask your doctor for help. If you stop too quickly, you could get withdrawal symptoms and they could be dangerous for your heart. These symptoms include: ... chest pain, which may be angina or a heart attack."

Awe damn it.. even propranolol has withdrawal..

Hmmm maybe not then I've already been working on it like 3 days.....

Did you stop taking it or something?

This is why I make sure I never run out of that med...

I am so sleepy. I didn't get enough caffeine this morning.

Oh my g. The doc or np was just here to see me and she was glad that I was dressed and not still under the covers. I get so afraid of these little meetings. Luckily I think I still have water in my pitcher.

She increased my Prozac because of my late sleeping, but I don't feel any different. She wants me to read in different places.

If anything, now my anxiety is rising up through the atmosphere here. I'm so tired. I wish I could make that disappear.

Im sorry for acting like im angry. Im just scared i wont be accepted. This school is my last hope. Its like my mind is preparing for future stress or something.

I just need to be thankful that my chest pain is getting better and that im not under a severe amount of stress right now. This month seems to be a lot better than the past few months. Im just happy about that. Yea no month is without challenges, but it seems better. Not trying to jinx it tho, you know. I still got a lot to do before the year ends.

Upped my Lamictal to 75 mg today. Still depressed. Bf is at work, second day of his new job. He said his first day went okay. He is very excited about working, to make money and come to see me. He told me that last year around this time I was depressed too. We haven't dated on October last year and I disappeared from him for a while due to depression.

Did my nails, I find it calming somehow. I love the process of coloring the nails. I love the colors. Brighten up my gloomy world. So yeah I'm depressed but feel calmed if that even make sense.

Been watching YouTube videos about grammars and pronunciation lately, my oral English is way worse than my written.

It was ASU right? as far as I can tell you can get an sat waiver if you have a 2.5 or higher if out of state so you can either spend a little time bumping your grades up in community college or just take the test at a testing center....its not the end of the world.

Oh well your written English is perfect though. Sorry you're depressed. What color nails? Maybe a pic?

https://students.asu.edu/admission/competencies

See i didnt know that. Not sure when they have testing for sat. Ill look on collegeboard.com. But i might have to go back to community college.

Gonna wait probably til i talk to my admissions advisor next week tho. I just sent him a text. He might could help me out further.

I get really scared about everything. I have a lot of fears which drive me. My health, my schooling, my family etc

There is always a path through........the fear is temporary....

No thank god. I'm thinking of trying it for a while and then slowly going off of it cuz Idk what else to do at this point but I see the doctor in 25 minutes so maybe he will have other ideas.

I don't want him to check my heart beat with the stethoscope again cuz I'm scared lol ^^

Fear.. the opposite of love..

Anger.. the internal fear..

My lips are tingling and my spine is electrical too. I feel like I'm on a low grade amphetamine. I don't like it.

Maroon? Idk what color is this..

Could it be an allergic reaction to something, maybe you should tell someone?

haha I don't know either but its nice

Burgundy!!!