Roll Call 126!

I stayed up all night. 8.34 AM. Still can’t sleep. Mind is racing and soul is restless. Took another dose of Zyprexa, I’m on a very low dose anyway not like it’d hurt me.

12am feel better dear.

The last thing i said to my psychiatrist is "she should of bought a swiffer". I thought it funny.

Good morning. Made it until 6:30! Slept great. I feel good.
Going out later this afternoon. I’m going to dress up but still not going to use makeup lol. It’s going to be 95. I think it’d melt.
I can’t believe I’ve been married 16 years. My kid finally figured out that I was pregnant when I got married. Ooops.
Hope everyone has a good day.

hope the extra Zyprexa helped.

I think I’m going to book a moose tour! I’ve never seen one in the wild despite my many attempts. I think the kids would get a kick out of it.

My friend is here, and it's his birthday. I couldn't get him a gift because of being locked up here without a credit card. Yesterday we thought maybe we'd go to the beach but it was so hot yesterday I don't think I can stand the heat today.

Morning Angelique. Glad to hear you’re getting to spend his birthday together.

I woke up at 5:30am I went to sleep at 9pm. It’s 6 something now. earlier yesterday I smoked some high grade medicinal indica and i was out like a light! It was a nice change for things to be able to sleep a good 8.5hours.

I need to separate my laundry to do it downstairs I have no more clothes to wear, everything is dirty and I ran out of socks to wear. It’s going to take at least an 92mins.

Unfortunately I have to wait until 7 to go down and do my laundry.

the humidity here makes the heat unbearable

esp because I'm on invega and it makes me sensitive to heat

woke up to a message from my roommate asking me to clean up my dishes

I felt embarrassed. I've been slacking a lot. I'm not really taking care of myself at all

I've always been aware of this drive within me to make my circumstances so bad that the only option left is sui

I fight it every day but some days it wins

Good afternoon/morning everyone. How are things going?

I'm sorry you guys aren't feeling well, 12AM and junkDNA. I hope you both feel better soon.

I'm doing okay. Went to the festival and watched my bandmates perform. Went to the stores as well with my partner and her BF as well. I was tempted to buy some lipstick, but didn't. I am denying urges to buy stuff till I set up my home studio. Came home and belted out some vocals to try and get myself hyped up a little more.


What's everyone up to today?

Thank you I woke up at 6 PM, three and a half hour ago and still drowsy which is not surprising due to double dose. Tried to fix my laptop but the WiFi wouldn’t connect due to bad signal.

Does your T know about this? At least talk here if he doesn’t, being alone when you feel like this is the worst idea

he knows. i cancelled my appt with him tomorrow though. i know ill just cry and whine

going to work helps for the most part. its just a distraction

I’m sorry you are struggling junk. I hope you feel better really soon.

I hate myself when I whine and cry. I isolate myself a lot during bad depression. But fiancé told me there’s nothing wrong with whining and crying as sometimes we just need to let it all out. We all need a shoulder to cry on and some other times we are the shoulder to cry on for other people.

I’m glad you find working helps. Hang in there DNA, those feelings will pass

Morning......

Happy July 1st.

Today is gonna suck.

I dont think i want to talk to my friend for awhile. She made me really upset.

She called me drunk 2 days ago in a manic state. Saying she sees her dead moms body floating in her pool. Then yesterday she got mad at me for contacting her friend to see if she was ok.

Omg Russia won

Here too. We went to a cafe for brunch and the day is just getting hotter and hotter. He went back to my place to start going through stuff. It all has to go in storage I guess.

I hope you're staying in AC today.

Thanks, yes. We had a nice couple of hours. It was just too hot and I couldn't have walked more than a block. I'm very gloomy today. I hope I wasn't a wet blanket.

It sounds like me too, although I haven't been very self aware about it. I hope you'll feel a lot better soon.

Got my haircut. I'm looking like a smooth criminal. I'd take a picture but I'm in public. Maybe later.

I do not want Russia to win. They can't win. I hate Russia for electing Trump.