Roll Call 139

It's so fun when you misread something as totally bizarre

I've been reading about weighted blankets. I wonder if one would help with my anxiety in regard to sleeping

Feeling tired. Gonna make coffee then I go to work. There's not much to do at work because it's not busy so meh..

Roommate is having a party where we live. Apparently pretty girls were not invited because they were annoying during trip to Canada. Lol so I'm agunna pass on this party. I went to the library, then the bar, now I'm going to stay at Panera bread as late as possible, working on my manuscript and book my psychologist told me to read. So far it's a real page turner!

Didn't realize how hungry I was till I ate dinner. All I had eaten prior to dinner just now today was a small bit of soup and a salad.

I feel great today, I'm so thankful. Way better than I've felt the past week or so. My concentration was horrible, completely scatterbrained, anxious, depressed somewhat, crazy sleeping pattern/routine, exhausted and feeling like crap physically.

About to go grocery shopping

Feeling out of focus foggy headed slightly depressed. Used 150mg CBD today and an extra atenolol last night because my heart was beating faster. I think taking ativan while being physically active is a bad idea because it makes my heart beat much faster. Was able to have 2 coffee's today because of CBD and atenolol..

I use 100-200mg CBD a day. So with 4 grams, it should only last about a month. That's why I need a prescription so insurance or disability can pay for it. Otherwise I'd have to find something else for anxiety..............

Went to a friend’s baby shower today, then afterwards got Starbucks, went for dinner (had two drinks, brussell sprout app, gluten free burger with fries and broccolini), did some grocery shopping, then went and bought hand cream and leave in conditioner, came home and took my meds.

Done for the day. Time to fall asleep watching TV.

Fun day!

Did you get anything good?

Not really, just regular cheap food

This sounds a little like hypomania with racing thoughts, and insomnia. Do you ever have really low low's?

Yeah I'm diagnosed with Schizoaffective Bipolar Type. My lows are nowhere near as extreme as they used to be but I do still get them



My highs aren't as high as they used to be either, I used to have full blown manic episodes but not anymore

So things aren't as extreme anymore but they're enough to create quite a disruption in my life.

It seems I've been alternating. I was very depressed for 2 months then started feeling good and did well for awhile, then spent a month barely sleeping then I spent the past two weeks depressed now I feel better

Cleaned my kitchen and did some stress relief yoga

I wish I was hypomanic

I have a headache, probably from too much caffeine but I have nothing I can take because I just have excedrin and it has caffeine in it lol

I'm really craving oatmeal

Saaaaame.

I had a very productive day. I got some assignments done, cleaned, did yoga, took a walk. Tomorrow I have to do laundry, finally. I've put it off as long as possible. I like the convenience of the laundry room at this complex but since they're doing construction repairing the foundation collapse I have to take my laundry on the bus to the laundromat.

I fell asleep on the couch earlier watching TV and now I can’t sleep. I took a bit extra seroquel hoping that’ll kick in and knock me out... bleh I just wanna have a nice long sleep I look forward to the weekend because I get to sleep more and not work.

I notice that your need and anticipation for sleep could come from depression. Sleep is like in between life and death. Dreams and endorphins from sleep.

I'm kind of that way now too. I take the seroquel because I don't want to live anymore past 11pm.. like theres only so much that I want to do before I say "**** it, life is boring I want to dream instead".

I don't know how to fix this. I remember saying this before about getting tired of being awake and that dreams are the same thing as being awake and it's never ending hell.

Oohh ****k it's lateeee

I dieeeee

gn gn

Good morning, slept good. Going to church in the evening, other than that not much going on. I have to go do laundry later. Will be relieved to get it done.

I'm going to the science museum down the street from me during the week. They have a planetarium too. I can't wait. I love museums but haven't been to one in forever. I've literally lived in this apartment 3 years, it's a 10 minute walk away and I've never gone due to anxiety. Being a library patron I can get a free pass. Going will be a big step in facing my anxiety over doing something new and different than usual