Roll Call 176

I always make hair spiky!...

Your spiky hair looks good Desoxyn!

Not feeling well. Think it’s allergies. Can’t breathe fully well, nose isn’t runny but stuffy a bit, and coughing.

This happens when it rains, and it rained for the first time in awhile today. And will be raining for the next 2 days.

I took an allergy med and we will see if that helps. Should’ve taken it this morning when I noticed I couldn’t breathe well and coughed til I threw up a bit.

Sorry tmi. Just scared with everything going on in the world...you know.

Have a 4 o'clock appointment for Esther on Wednesday for the vet.

Zyrtec, an allergy med, made me feel better. So it was just allergies.

I feel I should stay accountable with u all, especially bb. So, I cleaned house today. Did a lot of sleeping tho.

That's great!

Glad you're feeling better.


I go through spells where I have to sleep a lot. My T says there are worse things.

I cleaned the cat litter boxes this morning. But that was the extent of my cleaning.

Yeah I'm still sleeping 14 hours a night. Have been for ~3 weeks.

We did a food giveaway at Church this weekend. We've been doing it once a month. This month though we got hooked up somehow with a local food bank and they dropped off 150 boxes of fresh milk, eggs, produce, and meat to give out along with our bags of non-perishables. It was awesome!

That’s good tho!!!

I'm loving this Ashwagandha. It's like an opioid and makes me have deep MIND RESTS...

I’ve been feeling depressed. Unmotivated at work. I’m trying my best. I just talked to my psych on Thursday. I was feeling fine on Thursday. Just kicked in over the last couple days.

I just want to get drunk and go to sleep and not work in the morning. Sigh.

I keep failing at taking my meds as prescribed. I'm still doing good but I could do better.

Every time I alter my meds or add new things even slightly, BOOM.. Depersonalization/derealization!!

I just need..... I need.. To be ok.. Things are not ok for me..

I'm just trying to survive. I think I will go down with this ship.

I need to be optimistic but this is the darkest time of my life. I've never been in such darkness before - I used to ignore even darker with psychoactive chemicals.

I'm not ok. I'm alone, scared and confused.

Maybe I'll feel better when the olanzepine kicks in and when I get the Invega injection on Friday.

I'm just so scared of panic attacks. If I knew that I would never have one again, I would be so happy. But I think my afterlife will be an eternal panic attack.

I didn't take my Abilify today.

Why did you put a trigger warning on the photo? Your hair is great!

Take it tomorrow...

Then talk to your prescriber about concerns. What can happen is psychosis from withdrawal of a lot of abilify. You need something to replace it :/

Thanks!

It's so theres more anonymity if I put it in a trigger - Less sketchy people (Weird scientists that study roll call) will see cuz not everyone will click.

No, we are well from every illness and affliction in the afterlife. That's what they say in all the NDE books I've read. I hope you feel better soon.

Yiiiiiikes. Why do I do these things?

I guess I just do whatever I want most of the time with meds. It doesn't really help me too much.

I wish I could just take like 15 mg of Zyprexa and no Abilify or something like that.

Edit: Then again, I hate Zyprexa.

Same my friend... It's harder than it sounds.

Yknow... It's crazy to say this since I've been an atheist for most of my life (Until my trip).. But if that's true, I could easily hold onto that and stick with life. It's like having a benzo just in case.. But with fear of death..

I can see why religions help people..

Under 10 hours until the morning vape! They switched me back to Group 2. Maybe they switched the cute guy to Group 1 lol.

My friend only got me 30 mls of the menthol vape, and 2 30 mls of cinnamon roll. No caramel apple. Oh well, I'll try again next time. For now, I'll be vaping my menthol fruit flavor in mere hours! Yay!