Roll Call 176

I voted mail in

I have new booties on. Black one with zippers on the side, a buckle and metal half zippers going around the top. Super bad @**

I feel rubbed raw today. Like everything is bothering me. IDK if it is that I am being overly sensitive (probably) or what exactly. It's an uncomfortable feeling.

I’m sorry

Hopefully you’ll start to feel better. For me, that’s the start of anxiety.

The booties sound cute too!

Feeling nauseous

You didn't let anyone down Newtus, you're still doing great

Many people eventually learn they don't need traditional schooling to be successful.

This is true...many people in IT worth billions are college dropouts....

Omg you guys

Y’all are so kind

I just seem to be super persistent in my writing and business but school is something that like... school and I don’t seem to click. I feel like a societal failure to not get a degree tho.

I really need to clean. And go grocery shopping, will try to go Thursday since I have appointments tomorrow. I think either friday or this weekend I'll stop by the pizza/fried chicken place on the corner and get a couple slices and a soda

This is why we have alternative learning centers like libraries.....there are no grades and you can learn whatever you want at your own pace and it’s even free. You might do better with something self paced like a coursera course or some equivalent.

I actually am gonna do that! With either coursera or udemy. Whichever is cheaper.

What are you up to SP?

Has anyone checked the event board on AC to see if there is any events coming up?

Ugh I gotta take down the Halloween decor in AC oh mannn

Doing homework mostly but have the day off because we are an election location.....

The other things to consider is when people become famous they often get honorary degrees from colleges.......so keep working on writing....and one day you’ll have th degree for free

Eating a bag of maltesers

Having a panic attack. Just took klonopin. It's my own fault though. I drank too much coffee today. I'll have a cup of sleepytime tea later tonight

I keep ending up using my old ED behaviors again. I don't know why I want to lose weight so badly. I'm 147 lbs. I've lost 15lbs on Metformin, I should be satisfied. But old habits keep coming back. Somewhere in my head I think I have to weigh a lot less to be happy.
Anyway, I started posting in the What are you eating? thread again to hold myself accountable. I don't want my eating disorder to come back.

Just found two hairs in the stew my mom made for us. Plus the rice last night (she made too) was so extremely salty that I felt sick all the way into today.

Finding hair in my moms food is like so common with her. She doesn’t put her hair up idk why. It’s long.

That's how it was with my mom too lol

Had a 5 hour nap lol fack

Yeah I had a panic attack when I drank two cups of coffee at work.

I don't think most people make coffee as natural like my cup every morning. I use full dry coffee beans, grind them up and drip using a filter.

Don't drink work coffee or buy pre-ground coffee, a coffee machine, and especially Keurig coffee pods - Those are the worst.

Coffee must be dark as hell not looking .. like watered down stuff - Cuz then you'll just drink more and added water in the blood while feeling jittery is no good you just need to use the washroom all the time. I know during a panic attack I'll pee 5 times wondering "Why do I keep having to use the washroom??" - It's like the adrenaline dehydrates. Coffee is a diuretic?

A pot of coffee is no good either. There's many different psychoactive chemicals in coffee apart from caffeine - Those help balance out the caffeine maybe.

Lemon water is good too maybe with MCT oil - It detoxifies the body well. I put MCT oil in my coffee every morning and went from 177lbs to 173lbs but I stopped cuz I can't be bothered to learn about ketosis right now with all the things I'm doing.

I think coffee is so bad for panic attacks because it reduces the quality of sleep by binding to adenosine? Melatonin receptors? Idk.. But it's like modafinil in a way.

Soz. This is maybe useless information I'm quite tired. Maybe I need a coffee.

Praying for u muricans rn