[Blue_Bird]

Here's a fresh Roll Call, last one hit 100 pages

[Angelique67]

Thank you, Blue_Bird!

[Blue_Bird]

I'm debating what hobby to start doing more regularly, I want to do all of them but I don't want to get overwhelmed. I want to start drawing again, playing my ukulele, and learning to crochet. Hard to pick

[Blue_Bird]

I have some vanilla bean buttercream scented wax melting in my Scentsy

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I'm debating what hobby to start doing more regularly, I want to do all of them but I don't want to get overwhelmed. I want to start drawing again, playing my ukulele, and learning to crochet. Hard to pick

You could put them all in a row or semi circle and see what you're drawn to now.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I have some vanilla bean buttercream scented wax melting in my Scentsy

That sounds good!

[cogladaid]

Listening to music instead of sleeping.

I feel wrong. Hyper aware that I’m wrong.

[falcon09]

Struggling hard with sleeping.

Clozapine makes me sleep at least 12 hours after I take it at night and I feel foggy headed all day even while awake, very annoynig.

[cogladaid]

Just keep going over my head what the say to my doctor tomorrow.

Basically: I think the pharmacy is poisoning me and the meds are poison. I stopped taking the meds Wednesday afternoon. I just want to say **** the psychiatrist at this point I’m so exhausted with everything. I contacted a crisis hotline on Saturday I felt so bad. I’ve also had eating disorder thoughts and have barely ate anything the last few days.

That really sums it up I think.

[Desoxyn]

I don't feel well. I lied down in bed and my thoughts were kind of psychotic. The thoughts were like Alan Watts philosophy type. Then the olanzepine kicked in and I lied there for hours.

My mind feels like mush.

[WastingAsparagus]

Yeah, I am talking to the doctor on Tuesday. I think I know what to tell her. Just that the Klonopin was destroying me.

[WastingAsparagus]

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I don't feel well. I lied down in bed and my thoughts were kind of psychotic. The thoughts were like Alan Watts philosophy type. Then the olanzepine kicked in and I lied there for hours.

My mind feels like mush.

My mind feels similarly when I take olanzapine. I don't know why. Nor do I wish to discourage you from taking it. But it seems to have that effect on me.

Also whenever I listen to Alan Watts stuff I get similar stuff going on, so I get what you mean by that.

[WastingAsparagus]

Also my psychiatrist said I should not be on olanzapine long-term. So that's good for me. I guess I don't know what I'll use to control positive symptoms though.

[WastingAsparagus]

Anyway, just listening to some music instead of sleeping. I wish days weren't constrained by sleeping hours. This band is so damned old too. I mean like still 2000s. But still. That's damned old by my standards.

[cogladaid]

I feel annoyed by Facebook groups. Every group I’m in regardless what it’s about I only ever get maybe a couple likes and a couple comments. Everyone else seems to get lots of replies and likes.

I know I shouldn’t care but like they’re talking about baking a ****ing cake and I’m like ‘hi I’m literally losing my ****ing mind can someone give advice’.

[Desoxyn]

Originally Posted by cogladaid

I feel annoyed by Facebook groups. Every group I’m in regardless what it’s about I only ever get maybe a couple likes and a couple comments. Everyone else seems to get lots of replies and likes.

I know I shouldn’t care but like they’re talking about baking a ****ing cake and I’m like ‘hi I’m literally losing my ****ing mind can someone give advice’.

Same thing happens with me. I think people get replies when they've been posting for a long time idk

[cogladaid]

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

Same thing happens with me. I think people get replies when they've been posting for a long time idk

I’ve been part of these groups for years and am fairly active. It’s just dumb.

I feel like no one cares.

[Desoxyn]

Fukkk guys I took kratom and phenibut and now I feel worse in some ways and better in others - Mostly anxiety reducing. I'll try and quit these + weed as well.

I can't wait for the NAC to arrive. I have a feeling that it helps but also because I know it helps, I'm aware of a placebo - That I'll be much happier.. being like how I was and able to have an improved cognition.

I went to work and then spent like 3 hours researching crypto with no break.

I'll try and go to sleep soon - Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

[falcon09]

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

Also my psychiatrist said I should not be on olanzapine long-term. So that's good for me. I guess I don't know what I'll use to control positive symptoms though.

If Olanzapine is the only thing that works well for you there are adjunct meds that can help with the weight gain and metabolic stuff. My doc put me on metformin and that helped.

I understand not wanting to be on it though.....Olanzapine made me feel like a zombie.

[WastingAsparagus]

Originally Posted by falcon09

If Olanzapine is the only thing that works well for you there are adjunct meds that can help with the weight gain and metabolic stuff. My doc put me on metformin and that helped.

I understand not wanting to be on it though.....Olanzapine made me feel like a zombie.

Yeah the thing is it controls my positive symptoms well. Abilify for the negative symptoms and severe depression. I should maybe not be so hasty this time about going off of olanzapine. Probably not to be honest. Last time I went off of it, it was quite nasty. And last time I went off of Abilify it was also quite nasty. These were all changes my past psychiatrist wanted to make. I don't know why. Just to cause trouble I guess. Seems like Klonopin was causing my severe depression lately too. So that's great. At least I know now.

[Desoxyn]

I feel hella like a zombie. I feel pain. But it's ok.. I'll stay on these meds for a while but not forever!!

[WastingAsparagus]

Yeah I also realized that a higher dose of olanzapine (10 mg) helps my anxiety, too. Like a lot. So I somehow have to communicate all of this to my psychiatrist on Tuesday.

[WastingAsparagus]

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I feel hella like a zombie. I feel pain. But it's ok.. I'll stay on these meds for a while but not forever!!

I used to feel tons of just tactile emotional pain. I don't know if I still do. Sometimes I do I guess.

[cogladaid]

I slept from 1130pm until 330am and I’m awake again. Boo.

[cogladaid]

I can’t tell if I fell back asleep or if I just tossed and turned and stared at a wall for three and a half hours.

But I’m up now getting ready for work! Yay?