[AlteredState01]

I am noticing that as I get older (40ish+, sort of), I am becoming more set in my ways - as we all do when we mature - but it is making it difficult for me to accept new concepts and ideas that may help me to recover from my mental illness.

I find I am not so open to "new" things as I once was to different therapies and medications, and find my skepticism rising, but in a different way than what I usually experience through my illness.

I have reached a certain level of acceptance with my illness, yet I worry that, as I get older, that 'certain level' will become, and remain stagnant as this process of being 'more set in one's ways' becomes more prominant in my personality. It is like a giving-in attitude, and since I am borderline with histrionic and narccicistic tendencies, I just know I will become much more stubborn as time goes on. I am already noticing it.

How does one counteract this "natural" narrowing of the mind with the narrowness one already experiences as a result of illness?

[biplol]

AS, I have found that in me as well. I was 25 when I got married , my husband and I used to talk about the older people not wanting to hear anybody else's opinion and how wrong they were.
Well, look whose got to that point!
I wish there was a way to feel more open, maybe being aware of it, would make you feel like listening at least to the 3 fisrt words somebody has to say, lol.
Ohh well, I tried!

[(JD)]

From what I am studying (Positive Psychology) this could be something like learned pessimism. I know as time goes on, I am prone to think, oh I've tried that... or everytime I did such and such the result wasn't so great... and thus I am less likely to try again. I am working hard on learning Optimism now... hoping to counteract this trend. TC!

[Perna]

I think it's more a personal perception than a set-in-cement state? There's nothing wrong with accepting one's illness, there's no rule that one has to become better or evolve, etc., that's all internal "wants" or needs? I think we rail against our illnesses in different ways at different times in our lives. It's a little bit like when a loved one dies; we are disbelieving, numb, angry, all sorts of things but eventually we get less "disturbed" about the person being gone and perhaps recognize they are still in our hearts and their memory is helping us, etc. I feel I "wasted" a good 15-20 years of my life when I was young and my T even once mentioned what a shame that was. However, I also got something out of those years, they, along with everything else, went into making me who I am now. I think the older we get, like a GPA, the harder it is to change the larger picture because there's so much of it? It's like kids when they're in elementary school and think summer lasts forever but we get to be adults and summer gets shorter and shorter each year

I don't think any of this is "bad" or narrow minded. I think it has to do with interest and how one wants to spend one's resources/energy? I'm much more focused now than I was even 10-15 years ago and I like that. I had a heck of a time when I was "exploring" and trying to find how to combat my illnesses, etc. and all over the place with ideas and projects and things I thought I wanted. Now I'm overall much happier because I have a few routes and ideas of what I want to pursue in earnest.