Self help suggestions?

Since I can't exactly get help from anyone or anywhere else I have decided to look into self help but I really don't know much about it or where to start? I'm so new to all of this even acknowledging to myself that there are problems I need to deal with is really hard.

Hello Akane: Well... I looked at your bio & it said you're extremely shy & have a lot of anxiety. I can certainly relate to the anxiety part. I'm not necessarily shy. But I do pretty-much just keep to myself. (I'm an older person, by the way.)

You wrote you can't exactly get help from anyone or anywhere. I don't know why that is... if it's financial, due to where you live, or because you feel you wouldn't be up to it, or if your husband or other family members would disapprove. All of those sorts of things can be deterrents when it comes to seeking mental health services. But really, individual therapy & perhaps something such as CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) would be the types of services individuals would ordinarily seek I believe.

I personally am not on psych med's nor do I see a therapist. I've tried both in the past. But neither was of any great benefit to me. So I guess you'd say I'm on a self-help sort-of path myself. And, based on my own personal experience, I'd have to say it can be a tough way to go. I myself am a follower of the writings of the Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön. Ani Pema teaches the ancient Tibetan Buddhist practice called "Lojong" or "mind training". (By the way there are some short excerpts from Pema's book: Start Where You Are- A Guide to Compassionate Living in my bio here on PC.)

However, another very good option I'm familiar with is contained in the book Full Catastrophe Living- Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness. This book describes, in detail, the program of the Stress Reduction Clinic at the University of Massachusetts Medical Center. It is written for the person who wants to try to implement that program on their own at home.

So these are a couple of "self-help" sorts of resources I'm familiar with. I'm sure there are others as well. Hopefully some other members, here on PC, will have some additional suggestions to share.

I have issues with the idea of so-called "self-help" since we cannot heal ourselves, but I think you might be talking more about something like "independent research and study" and then learning to actually do some of things we can all read about...and that has definitely been helpful for me.

It might be an idea to look into Amazon and use words like: 'self-help depression', 'self-help anxiety' or "self-help + the word for what you need most help with". You can look into the books and decide what appeals most to your needs.

Good luck!

I went though a period like this but most self help books were crap. Still however, I found a few good ones that i stick with today that DID help me.

For Anxiety I found
"full catastrophe living" by Jon Kabat Zinn and the "Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle.

Full Catastrophe takes a buddhist view on depression and anxiety and likely it is something that you have never heard before. But an example to give you an idea is instead of saying to yourself "I am so fat" you say "I happen to be overweight at this particular point in time". The first line is like *I am so fat and likely always will be* the second is like *I am fat right now but it doesn't always have to be that way*

The power of now was also excellent. He presents an entirely new way of thinking. Stay in he present. But beyond that his was the first book to suggest to me that the "thoughts" I had in my head, I didn't have to act in conformance with them. My thought was not me. He suggest that there is an "ego" inside all of us that is very self destructive. You don't have to listen to it. You hear it say "you could never do that" and you just laugh and pet Mr. Ego on the head and say, of course I can. I see what your trying to do Mr. Ego. He puts it like you disassociate from your negative thoughts.

Finally a good book that always motivated me is "DO IT" lets get off our butts-- I can't remember the author's name. Peter I think. This book is mostly motivational quotes. It always makes me feel like I can do anything.