A few Measly Steps a Day

Avoid AmeriMark. Scammer, liars, & cheats.

They've managed to filch $21 from me. Well, now with belated research I can see I'll never get the goods or get my money. PayPal, through which I paid, seems unwilling to use their muscles to call them on their tactics and return my money. So far, I'll know more after I hear back from Paypal's CEO (or the FTC, or attorney generals, or one of the law firms compiling cases for a class action).

So I once again join forces with other marks* & we'll be a team of gnats, bees, & hornets. I will warehouse information on a google site about class actions, where to complain, responses, and their crappy reviews on BBB and other complaint sites.

* a mark in slang language is the unwitting receiver of the attentions of swindlers and con artists.

Who is the super hero for Consumer Justice? Patron Saint? Not St Anthony, he's busy with lost causes.

Seems I'm dealing with scammers a lot more frequently in the past few years. Indigogo "campaign" called unobrush was a full-on scam and they're likely getting away with a dirty $2 millions, my hit, $129. Link: v.gd - Shortened URL (click through)

Wench.com full on venture capitalist backed scammers. Overcharged me $110. My pages on them is here: v.gd - Shortened URL

The wench alert page will be my model for AmeriMark's. I'm settled in for having fun writing this up. It'll get spicier over time as I track literary quotes about knaves, thieves, scammers, crooks, and pickpockets.

Sigh, permanent on guard now and will run a "credit check" on any new company I'm considering business with.

In the Hall of Shame for Thieves, Amerimark joins some prestigious company: Wells Fargo (opening unnecessary accounts), Sears (rest in hell, hiking up repairs on cars, stealing patent for ratchet tools), BeechNut (diluting apple juice for babies, geesh), Ford (exploding Pintos), ... my fingers getting tired.

Rant easing, thanks for lending me your eyes. R.

You can try to contact their Cleveland, Ohio corporate offices to make a complaint and ask for some resolution.

If the above doesn't work, you can try to resolve this through:
1. The Better Business Bureau
and
2. The Attorney General in Ohio

If all of the above doesn't work, you can also sue them and take them to Small Claim's Court (if you have the means, wit, time, energy, and strength to do so, jus to get your point across).

There's also some Consumer websites where you can publicly make statements about certain companies and what you feel about them. Some of those websites might require paid membership though.

Name one step you can take to:
- do self-care
- bring a smile to your face
- feel a sense of safety
- feel a sense of calm
- feel a sense of peace

For me:

- do self-care: rest intermittently
- bring a smile to your face: find and post fun photos (I did that in a different thread under the dissociative disorders forum)
- feel a sense of safety: watching reruns of "Good Witch" (just the background noise and scenery helps me to feel safe
- feel a sense of calm: look around my bedroom and see my stuffies - some of which are Christmas presents that I gave to myself/little alters and teens
- feel a sense of peace: remind myself of all the things that I'm grateful for, including my own privileges

Quote:

Originally Posted by SprinkL3 Name one step you can take to: - do self-care - bring a smile to your face - feel a sense of safety - feel a sense of calm - feel a sense of peace

Luv this! Can I count the ways?
Self-care - “Don’t sacrifice yourself too much, because if you sacrifice too much there’s nothing else you can give and nobody will care for you.” ― Karl Lagerfeld via goodreads

Bring a smile - “We must risk delight. We can do without pleasure, but not delight. Not enjoyment. We must have the stubbornness to accept our gladness in the ruthless furnace of this world. To make injustice the only measure of our attention is to praise the Devil.” ~ Jack Gilbert

Feel safe - "When we feel safe the present comes alive." Source: Ourbond.com

Feel calm - "We can't control what happens on the outside but we do have a say over the quality of our mind. No matter what's going on, if your mind is OK, everything is OK. Right now." source: Psychology Today

Feel peace - "When you feel peaceful, you accept the challenges and face them with a newfound resilience." Source: Drivethru

Thanks Sprinkle for this. Finding quotes was fun.

I'll start mediating on the Test-Operate-Test-Exit psychology set-up in my Steinbeck Warmups thread if you care to come visit. I'm playing it keyed it songs & poetry.

@Revu2 - I love all the quotes - how creative! THANK YOU!

I've been moody lately. I'm trying to be positive amid the negative.

Hi, Steppers,

I'm procrastinating shamelessly, but I'm still making some headway into my yuck list. It includes health issues and housecleaning.

R, sending you good vibes for your condo tasks. I admire you for taking it on.

SprinkL3, it sounds as if you're making progress. Congratulations. When you add all the steps together, it amounts to an impressive achievement.

Concerning scammers - I don't usually cruise Facebook, but a couple of days ago I did that and found a very cool video. (No, I don't have the link. Sorry) An engineer designed a box which he leaves for thieves to find. It contains skunk spray, a glitter bomb, four cameras which transmit videos to local police stations, two rods which prevent the box from closing, and a recorded countdown sequence. He can somehow get addresses for scammer phone numbers and sends glitter bomb boxes to them as well. On the positive side, he also leaves boxes by apartment house mailboxes. Most people ignore the boxes, a few call the number on the outside of the box to warn that the box is in a location likely to attract thieves, and of course a few of the people who pass by steal the boxes. It made me hopeful. Also on the hopeful side, the police caught some of the thieves who have been stealing catalytic converters in our area.

Okay, I'll go attack some of my things to do.

Good wishes to you.

Hi, with 2 weeks of a lite schedule I've taken too many books & books on CD from the library. Even streaming something I've borrowed, too.

Tonight, I made the connection that condo ownership has elements of poker play, not the stakes-gambling parts, but the playing part. In Hold 'Em, everyone antes up to play get dealt a pair of cards face down. In a condo, that's your unit. Then there are 5 cards face up which are the communal cards, and in the condo there are communal spaces. The betting is reversed! In poker, players bet to win the pot, in condos people maneuver to avoid the "pot," the burden of taking care of the communal spaces.

Breaks down here, because ownership follows people until they sell.

Thanks for admiration. It's just something I need to be part of if I want a roof over my bed the rest of my life, 60% self interest. The challenge is not all of the owners feel the same pinch since nearly half don't live here. A few have never lived here.

The big challenge is to reduce the time I spend bellyaching. The ratio can be as hight as for every hour of work I might spend 2 hours bellyaching. If I can hold the bellyaching to about 10 minutes per hour of work, even with the known a**holes and freeloaders trying to stir trouble or avoid work, I'll do just fine. That's my focus as I prep for this round of service. It's my 4th time I think being on the board in our 12-unit condo. Would I move into a condo this small again? No. So what, I'm here, I'll deal.

Revu2

Great poker analogy. People are imperfect, and getting them to agree on something, especially money, is a challenge. And then getting them to follow through . . . Anyway, kudos to you for stepping up. Me - I'm doing Christmas stuff today.

Have a merry holiday season, everyone.

I really wish I could move to a "safe land" with "safe neighbors" and "safe medical professionals." I just want to feel safe again. I don't feel safe, and I certainly don't feel free. I want to be able to walk outside without fear of being attacked - by a human, a virus, or anything.

I also wish I had more space in my home. Ideally, I'd like a two-bedroom. I prefer to rent, so as to minimize responsibilities and have the freedom to travel as I please, if I need to. I don't know if I'll ever settle on a place, but I'm hoping to in the distal future - if I'm still alive. For now, I just want to pay off my bills and focus on savings for the 2022 year. I have at least 2 credit cards that I need to pay off quickly, in order to avoid some interest. Once I pay off my credit cards, I don't use them. They'll just sit there with zero balances. I have 2 paid off so far, but I have about 4 or 5 left.

My health is important, but I'm doing what I can with the limitations we have. I'm also sticking to the minimal friends I have locally. They are nice, and I trust them. I don't know any neighbors yet, as I don't feel they are that nice or safe. I wished I lived in a different kind of home with a backyard and a frond door that opens to fresh air. I'm sick of living in hallways with shared air spaces. I would be so much more free if I didn't live in an apartment. But I can't afford a house. Maybe a duplex or triplex townhome or home rental would do, but everyone's selling those these days - no one is renting those things anymore. It sucks how the housing market took advantage of this pandemic, because they know that houses are safer than apartment and condo dwellings.

Still, I wouldn't want to buy or own at this time. The prices have inflated so much that I swear they tripled in price where I live. Only the rich seem to be able to afford houses.

Besides, with all the wildfires, sinkholes, earthquakes, tornadoes, hurricanes, potential tsunamis, climate crises, viral issues, economic issues, pandemic-related changes, uprisings, political changes, and more, it's not safe to truly own anything at this time - unless you are rich, able-bodied, privileged, employed, have a good-enough nest egg, partnered, and healthy (minimal risks).

Hi Thread. Sprinkle, yeah, I sense your constrictions through the 'net. Sucks.

My Yuck list update (completed in green):
Tracking a repayment for a fouled up order via Paypal
confirming a training date with client
paying local taxes in another state (online)
sending cousin a holiday wish and note for his share

The repayment this is on back on delay as I await Paypal getting an answer from the company. The company is a real con artist, so I'll be curious what they say to mollify Paypal, who'll try to mollify me. Fat chance, I know when I've been robbed.

Merry holidays to all, Revu2

Hi, got a notice today that PP has ruled "in my favor" and I can expect my refund to land in my account in a few days. Success!

My health is sundering, might be a mild case of covid (just got my booster on Thursday) as my partner tested pos. a couple of days ago. I tested negative, then, but here I am feeling achy and blahhy.

Quarantined according to the new, shorter CDC times.

Revu2

Congratulations on your refund!

I hope you don't have covid. But if you do, I hope you have a speedy recovery. The boosters are fully protective after 2 weeks from the shot, so if you get infected before then, that is because the booster didn't have time to strengthen to full capacity.

Sometimes the tests will appear negative within a certain amount of days of being infected, so you could try to get tested again just to be sure.

(((safe hugs)))

We're snowed in plus C-tests are in very limited supply. Not leaving the home, so I'll just have to ride this out.

Just checked my bank balance. PayPal refund is there! Case Closed.

Congrats on the refund!

I'm sorry you're snowed in though.

The C-tests are very hard to find since everyone stockpiled them for things like travel and attending multiple people's homes for the holidays and attending events like NYE parties and other festivities, Sadly, the ones who don't vaccine or mask may not even care to use the tests when they go about their business, so it's mainly those of us who are health-conscious.

I'm indoors all the time for NYE anyways. There are too many drunk drivers, rapists, muggers, strong-armed robberies, burglaries, domestic violence issues, intimate partner violence issues, and other violence reported around this time, which is why I've historically remained indoors. The only exception were the rare times I had felt safe around a group of friends who invited me out, but it's been over a decade since that happened. And I'm not about to risk everything during a pandemic. I'd much rather watch different events online and join in with the rest of us lonely ones on these forums.

I hope you'll be online here during NYE.

Happy New Year, Measly Steppers! Lurkers, too!

Just wrestling with things like passion, work, duty, luck. Random thoughts. First, in 2020 I achieved a long time goal: helped a client secured our building and land in a transfer from the city. Against the (deep interests) and desires of the Mayor, with the full support of the City Council. Took a year away from politics to recover.

Used the time at home to try my hand with gambling, of sorts. 6th time in my life, maybe charmed, but I exceeded my goal by a good margin.

Now this year. Oy.

1. The govn'r has dropped a major effort to do something with building more homes. This may be a good time to repeal a law limiting cities' powers to keep rents increases within reasonable bounds. [politics]
2. My tour do duty begins on what I call my Better Homes Project. [politics]
3. I'm still a working consultant. Some of the work sucks, some yucks, and some requires pluck.
4. I'm continuing my gaming ways.
5. I'm seeking to play Bridge in person 22 times in 2022.
6. I'm adding a gig for reviewing book drafts (minor honorarium, intensive work)
7. I am rebuilding my friendship network, too.

Several of these have some intensity for the first 98 days (14 weeks) of this year. Looking for mottoes or mantras:

Caretake this moment. Immerse yourself in its particulars. Respond to this person, this challenge, this deed. Quit the evasions. Stop giving yourself needless trouble. It is time to really live; to fully inhabit the situation you happen to be in now. You are not some disinterested bystander. Participate. Exert yourself. — Epictetus

In the midst of the storm, I stand serene. ~unknown

Know when to hold em,
Know when to fold em,
Know when to walk away,
Know when to run. ~ The Gambler

Revu2

Just in case anyone needed to see this today...

As you can tell by my absence, I've had a lot going on. R, congrats on your refund, and yuck to catching the virus. I hope you get well quickly. According to powers that be, you won't get it that badly if you've been vaccinated. Hopefully they're right.
SprinkL3, I'm glad your taking care of yourself. And thank you for the kitten. cute cartoon.

Me - I'm having the sewer line to the house replaced. I freaked out when I found how close he put the sewer line to the water. I've talked to several people including a friend of mine who used to be a plumber. Apparently, it's okay the way he did it. So I'm not freaked anymore.
I've heard this before, but the sewer incident really brought it home. Men do not hear women's voices. They're not horrible people, they simply do not hear us. An important piece of information for both genders. As a woman who wants to be heard, I'm thinking that there's a middle ground between being so polite that I'm dismissed and screaming obscenities. I need to find that middle ground.

@delightful - I was just discussing with my therapist yesterday about how my past traumas affect my abilities to connect well with men, the opposite sex to me (a cisgender female). But then there are also societal factors, such as women being ignored, treated as less-than, dealing with ongoing historical traumas (rape culture, discrimination, put-downs, chauvinism, gender-role expectations), and being lied to. It's hard when our kindness or our hormonal composition are seen as weaknesses, as opposed to just who we are as relational beings. Some women can be physically tough, as evidenced by many women in what society would typically consider male-dominant fields (police, military, firefighting, etc.). If you've had a traumatic past, my T says that it's challenging for us to deal with trauma triggers in the form of the people who remind us of our past abusers or perpetrators. The problem is when there are systemic issues at play, such as what you've eluded (or is it alluded?) to. It's understandable that you would see your reaction as "screaming," when it could be any reaction from any human of any gender or nonbinary stance who would feel the same way if their concerns were ignored - esp. safety concerns, such as the sewer being so close to the water.

I'm so sorry you are struggling with all this.

I hope you are able to find ways to feel safer and at peace. Perhaps there might be a solution such as installing a better barrier between the sewer and water pipes, if that's even allowed. I don't know anything about plumbing though.

But there are scientists out there who have stated that even standardized tests for spatial intelligence and otherwise are biased because females are typically not socialized in our families and in schools to be exposed to spatial-building skills. The toys that build such skills are made for boys, for instance. The emphasis on teaching and rewarding certain spatial intelligence, such as that with geometry, engineering, etc., to boys and males, as opposed to females and women or those who are nonbinary and considered "feminine." It's sad that we grow up socialized to be oblivious about plumbing, blueprints, architecture, and other things (like buying cars) that used to require men to assist women with making those decisions, often by silencing us and having a man speak in place of us - even on things like customer service issues. Those times may be long gone, but are they when the very people who are still in those fields treat women as if we're stupid or something.

It irks me that this still continues.

EDIT: The above expressed, I also have met some really kind men who do treat women as equals. I still struggle with my past traumas, but I now know how to differentiate my feelings and fears, for the most part. My T helps me understand why I struggle with those things, and why I'm emotionally in pain at different times. -Perhaps you can relate.

I hope you feel better.

Hi fellow steppers. Getting quite busy again. Got around to discussing raising my fees with my client. She maneuvered to put it on me to "think" about alternatives for a couple of days. Got back today.

Much work to compress in a few days. Seems every motion must fall near it's mark. Using time away from tasks to visualize what I want to do. So far, running smoothly enough.

Sad reading about being "not heard." I didn't feel "heard" when first talking with Amerimark while trying to find out where my stuff was. They heard paypal a lot better. But had the gall to write to claim they never saw the money ... thieves are hard of hearing for sure.

Revu

I ticked a few items off my to-do list today. A good thing. A few of my friends and family have tested positive for COVID. These are people who follow guidelines, don't go out a lot, and have had boosters shots. None of them are seriously ill, which is a good thing. According to my daughter, a doctor who is heavily immersed in dealing with COVID, omicron spreads like crazy, (20 times the cases) but is much less virulent (2 times the hospitalizations) than the previous strains. This makes sense. From my previous bacteriology days, I learned that viruses and bacteria tend to mutate to milder strains. (If they kill their host, their strain dies out.) That seems to be what's happening with omicron.
I'll do a bit more writing, and call it a day.

SprinkL3, I'm glad you added the comment that you've also met some men who do treat you well. I think it's so important to see the good in people. It's so important to give people a chance. It's less stressful than always being on the lookout and expecting insults.

My sewer work is probably just fine (speaking of making snap judgements.) He installed it better than building codes call for. I probably overreacted.

I'm ticking off chores/projects on my to-do list. It feels as if I'll never catch up with the things I need to do, but, one step at a time. I just paid the bill for the sewer line. One more piece of paperwork to go and that project will be completed.

Sometimes writing is a lot of hard work, and sometimes it's fun. Lately it's been fun. Yay!

Hi, R. good wishes for your projects.

Hi steppers, had a decent win yesterday. We presented the work of my client to their peers via Zoom and I composed the slide deck and MC'ed the 'performance.' Funder claimed "it was the best collaborative learning event, ever" and one of our peers noted how the processes we used (which I had a heavy hand in leading) got "his mind whirling" with possibilities.

Gotta get back to other work, allotting myself 2.5 or 3 hours today, just waiting for my mood to say Now! Meanwhile, I'm conducting a side fun research project on poker as a laboratory for dealing with confidence, psychology, philosophy, and even law! ? There's a book in the legal library on how lawyers can learn from poker. I just love my side projects.

Since I'm still coughing, I have some appointments to re-arrange while my symptoms die away. They can't leave fast enough and, yes, they can let the door slam as they go.
Revu2

Congrats R. I hope your cough goes away quickly.

Hello thread. Cough still lingering so I canceled plans to play bridge today to keep up my recovery and to just avoid any awkward moments where I would have to try to debate science I barely can recall about the duration, severity, etc. of COVID.

Meanwhile, I'm looking at a new goals challenge and I don't even have the language yet to search for studies. So, if you have a site or study to share, please help me.

Context: 7 years ago, way back in 2015, I spent my summer and fall doing my solo best to help educate my City Council on the benefits of stepping up and managing rents. This was one of my vague fantasies of when I get beyond 'work' I'd be just the mosquito in a tent on some important change.

I was 'tween work and saw a chance to be of service.

Well, the Council did vote out a Resolution to ask the state to repeal the law that limited it's ability to adjust rent increases across the city. Twice: 4-3 in committee, and 8-1 in the full Council. Big Win.

Now the Governor wants to address housing, and to win that he needs to get the Legislature to go along. Hence, laws will be in play around this very issue. I see that, so do I want to get back in, and if so how?

Here's the thing, From 2017 and still ongoing, I've helped a client face up to the Mayor and secure a property transfer. This is my legacy.

At the pure motive level it's a huge win for me: I set out to make a change and I have.

Can I let go of the original motive around rents?

I'm divided. I know things and hold a perspective that few others in the public sphere share. Yet, I won big on something like it. As an activist, I've serve and served and served. I'm up to get super busy on condo stuff, and I'm exhausted from the endless spirals of dialectics which is politics.

Yet, nudging this will help millions of people live more stable and secure lives. And it'll definitely inject a dose of fairness into the cruel steamroller called capitalism.

Yet if I were too ill or dead ....

Oy vey, R.

Joining the Fray; Fraying the Join

Wrestling with this "join in" or "pass" back n forth. Felt an uprush of sensation in my chest which with quiet reflection traced back to my childhood. It's an accidental feeling, some random bodily surprise which has connected itself to "motivation," "advocacy," and "making changes." ... more
[to keep this to reasonable length, and because it's less a step and more a reset, I'm continuing my 3+ days of reflection over on my Warmup thread.]